I love the concept. There are some grammatical errors. Caps, dialogue, things like that. There isn't a lot of descripition, which isn't necessarily a terrible thing.
Reviewer: Dreamingofalifetime Signed
[Report This]Date: April 03 2014 07:35 am
This is a sweet and funny story. So far so good! I like how we are in the minds of the characters.
Author's Response:
Awwww! Thanks! :)
Reviewer: LadySade Signed [Report This]Date: May 13 2013 06:22 am
Hi Pot I'm Kettle. I have grammar issues as well so I won't even go there but there is something missing. Maybe if you increased the length of the chapters to give them a bit more meat but glimpses could be what your going for.
Author's Response:
Hi! The pot kettle thing made me laugh lol! more meat?
Reviewer: Acdromance Signed
[Report This]Date: May 13 2013 12:28 am
Thanks for the update. Yes. You still had some grammar mistakes like I, was lower case.
Reviewer: Divsionred Signed [Report This]Date: May 13 2013 12:07 am
Does Matt own MP? Thanks
Author's Response:
Yea lol
Reviewer: Divsionred Signed [Report This]Date: May 13 2013 12:05 am
Good start. Thanks
Author's Response:
thank you
Reviewer: Divsionred Signed [Report This]Date: May 13 2013 12:03 am
Good start. Is this your first?
Author's Response:
yea
Reviewer: Brenda1257 Signed [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 10:55 pm
Very good start
Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 10:20 pm
The element of story needs more. Its a really good story
Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 10:20 pm
Great so far. Please update soon. I want to see where this is gong. I know M.P. is Matt's company.
Author's Response:
Thanks! :) And well just have to see! LOL! :)
Reviewer: Sharise Signed [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 02:13 pm
This story will be good, probably great, but you need an editor. I see several grammatical errors and that makes it hard to read. I like the concept though.
Author's Response:
Thanks and i know but i dont know where to find an editor. :(
Reviewer: KittyOh48 Signed [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 12:15 pm
Awww! Matt is infatuated already! I think you're getting of to a nice start. Yes there are some grammatical errors but just keep researching writing techniques and practicing and you'll be fine. There are also online spell checkers and plenty of other resources out there for us budding authors. Keep going, writing is so fun and theraputic. Happy writing! :-)
Author's Response:
awwww! Thank you! I tried to go back and edit out all the mistakes, im gonna look into the online spell checkers so thank you bunches! :)
Reviewer: kitten84 Anonymous [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 09:25 am
was the mis-spelling on purpose?
Author's Response:
I tried to go back and edit the spelling mistakes as well as i could
Reviewer: Anonymous Anonymous [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 04:48 am
I like the direction your story is going...so much so that I hope you continue with longer chapters!
Author's Response:
Aww thank you! My first review thats not about my grammar mistakes so thank you bunches! :) I hope you enjoy the chapters to come! :)
Reviewer: SunshineChica73 Signed [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 04:39 am
Check your grammar... Please.
Author's Response:
I know im going over it now! Thanks for the advice though.
Reviewer: LolaWrites Signed [Report This]Date: May 12 2013 03:28 am