Your story is funny. However it was a bit hard to read because it seemed to run on a bit. Not sure why. The part about Grandma and the 9 and bible was really good, but again, I had to go back to reread because it tended to run on.
I think it is because you have one long paragraph and it should be broken up for an easier read because it makes it like a person talking nonstop without a pause. (Hope Im making sense).
Reviewer: Brenda1257 Signed [Report This]
Date: 08/11/11 01:06 am
This is very funny. Full of humor and wit!
Reviewer: FranklinsMuse Signed
[Report This]Date: 28/03/11 01:26 am
Where are you girl. I love this story! Update please.
Reviewer: Anonymous Anonymous [Report This]Date: 21/08/10 05:15 am
Gurl you so crazy. This story was recomended by a friend. I love it . Its funny as all get out. Please keep writing
Reviewer: cimmy1 Anonymous [Report This]Date: 27/05/10 02:24 am
Ugh...have you ever wanted to just slap someone so badly?
I feel like slapping elizabeth lol
Man shes a bitch, I hope edward realizes it soon.
Date: 01/12/09 02:16 am
oops, I meant Keisha not Heather. I'll get the characters down, eventually. :0
Author's Response: That's ok I knew who you meant.
Date: 12/11/09 03:50 am
This story is pretty funny.
Author's Response: TY that is what I a going for funny, However there will be some drama in the future
[Report This]Date: 12/11/09 03:05 am
I love grandmamma. Looks to be another fun read. Looking forward to the next update.
Author's Response: TY
[Report This]Date: 11/11/09 11:28 pm
It's a good start. I injoy it and hope you write today.
Author's Response: TY
[Report This]Date: 26/10/09 07:36 pm
Would love to read more about how this plays out so please update soon and often.
Author's Response: I will try to update more. TY for reading my story
[Report This]Date: 26/10/09 07:24 pm
I love the start of this story. Can't wait for the next chapter.
Author's Response:
Thank you.
I will have one next Monday
Reviewer: raven004 Anonymous [Report This]Date: 20/10/09 04:50 am
Me likey.
Author's Response: Thank you
Date: 20/10/09 02:48 am
I think it's really a good start. You might want to re-read it before you post it, just to get the feel for the read. But I think it's a great start and I'm interested in seeing where this goes, since Heather's daddy is already married. Hmmm... great start!
Author's Response:
Thank you for your comments. I will try to do better on my editing next chapter.
All I can say there will be some Lucy and Ethal moments between Keisha and her best friend. Who will be putting in an appearance soon.
Reviewer: Dsmoothone Signed [Report This]Date: 19/10/09 07:04 pm
Hi Dimples,
Nice start!! There is a lot of potential here.
Keisha needs a job but wants her big singing break. She will have to thread very carefully for Edward to believe that she didn't use the nanny job to get next to him. (She did, but it's not something he'd soon forget or forgive.) I also can't wait to see what you do with the suicidal dog angle. LOL
Readers absolutely love nice long updates on a regular basis.
Please continue.
Author's Response:
I am glad you in enjoyed what you have read so far.
As for the suicidal dog angle her best friend is going to help with that, lets just say the four of them (Keisha, her best freind, Heather, and Charlie) will have some Lucy and Ethal moments in the story.
Reviewer: Bluegardenia Signed [Report This]Date: 19/10/09 12:47 pm