Beginning: 1. The original part or early stages of something. 2. The point in time or space at which something starts or comes into existence, or is first encountered.

I suppose every story has a beginning right? That also means it has an end, like everything else. Let me tell you the story of our beginning. So, that you carry no misconceptions of our relationship and us. It was a Friday night and Lucas wanted to feel like the twenty-four year old he was instead of the thirty something he felt.

He and some friends had heard about this club called 'Vixen' and decided to check it out. He was here for one reason and one reason only sex. He needed wanted mind numbing, pulse pounding, toe curling sex and he needed it tonight.

That's when he saw her dancing on the floor by herself her hips swaying to the beat. Her eyes closed and her lips slightly parted. The lights illuminated her curly dark russet hair and showed of the strands of red scattered throughout her hair. The white blouse she wore clung nicely to her shape giving an outline of her egg-shaped breast. The first two buttons on her blouse were undone showing off the lacy black bra underneath. He imagined how those breasts would feel in his hands, how they would taste as he enclosed his mouth around her taut nipples.

She was wearing a pair of heels on her feet. Her white pinstriped Bermuda shorts hugged the round of her hips showing off her shapely legs. Lucas couldn't help but imagine those legs wrapped around his waist as he taught her a thing or two. The look on her face as she quivered beneath him and arched for more the feel of her lips pressed against the nape of his neck. The smell of the curve of her neck as he buried himself to hilt as they moved in compete harmony.

At that moment, Lucas knew he didn't need to keep looking because he found what he wanted. Lucas sat in the back drinking rejecting every woman that approached him and just watched her. Lucas wasn't one to procrastinate but he knew she wasn't like the others. She called out to something inside of him that he thought he had omitted along time ago, his heart.

He waited until she approached the bar then set his plans into motion. He excused himself, escaping from a tall blond woman who had spent most of the night pushing her fake body parts at him. He approached her, his face cool and collected.

"Hey," that was smooth not.

"Hi," she had one of those meek voices that made Lucas wonder how loud she could scream. He'd find out tonight.

"Lucas Maxwell," now that he was closer he noticed how short she was. She couldn't be more then five foot her head stopped at that space were his abdomen met his torso.

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"Bea Phillips," she turned to look at him, lifting her head and smiled up at him. They talked for a while about nothing and everything at the same time.

"Dance with me?" Lucas requested. His exterior softening as they locked eyes with each other. Bea eyes never left his, she had not idea who Lucas was but she wanted to know him all of him.

Grabbing his hand and directing them to the middle of the dance floor. Grinding to the heavy beats emitting from the stereo they danced throughout the night bodies' close. The beats died out as slow song stated to play wrapping his arms around her waist just above her derrière. Pulling her closer to his torso her head resting comfortably against him they danced.

"Lucas?" Pulling herself from her thoughts and away from him, she looked up at him.

"Hmm"

"I'm not the kind of woman that does this but" just say it already!

Using his index and middle finger Lucas tipped her head up and looked her and the eyes."Say it, I won't deny you."

"Well, will you spend the night with me?" Biting her bottom lip fretfully, Bea waited for his answer. Taking in his form the tall structure, lean physique the black hair falling on his broad shoulder. His fuck me body, bedroom eyes and kiss me lips. His body was that of a warrior she wondered if he worked out a lot to get that physique. Bea waited for the classic 'not that your not attractive it's just you're not my type' line.

"No," his voice was strong and bearing. Bea turned her head only to have Lucas tip her head up and look her and the eyes."I don't want to just spend a night with you." His breath fanning against her face ass he licked the shell of her ear. "Besides, I want to do more then just sleep."

"Do you really I mean are you sure?"

"Ever since you said 'hi' I've be thinking about all the things I want to do to you."

Her face flushed and her eyes widened to the size of saucers. Lucas took matters into his own hands and kissed her eagerly using his mouth to convey what he just couldn't say. He crushed her body closer to his.

Lucas rushed her to his Ferrari by the time the were at his place they were making out like to sex crazed teenagers. Lucas gently laid Bea down on his sovereign sized bed eyed her like an animal would its prey. Her were lips parted and her breathing was irregular. Lucas looked down at the women laying across his bed his cock pushing painfully against the zipper of his jeans. He wanted her bad.

r09;­

Bea watched him those beautiful grey eyes of his now reminded her of pools of swirling grey mist, dark with desire for her. She watched as he shrugged off his jacket and approached her. He resembled that of a panther eyeing its prey. He moved stealthily towards her his clothes not making a sound as they hit the ground. He hovered over her putting most of his weight on his knees. He reached a hand out to her blouse stroking the exposed flesh with his hand. Using his other hand and lengthy fingers to unbutton the rest of her blouse Bea's body began to burn with impatience. Sliding the blouse off, of her shoulders and flinging it to the side. Lucas kissed the bare flesh burying his lips within her neckline. Her smell, her lips, her moans, everything about her elated him made him want her more.

Bea pushed Lucas onto his back her lips never leaving his. Her shaking fingers toying with the buttons on his blazer. He pulled back looking into her smothering brown eyes. Placing a firm hand against her cheek looking into those brown eyes he had come to adore within the last three hours. He pulled back her lips following his finally detaching from hers.

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

Bea was touched by the tenderness of his question; most men would just climb on top do their business then disappear the next morning. However, he wasn't like most men he was gentle and treated her body as if it were made of the finest glass and could the wrong touch could destroy it.

"It depends."

"On what, may I ask?"

"If you promise, not to wake up and feel disappointed when you wake up next to me instead of a gorgeous model."

"I can't be disappointed not when you're around."

Bea smiled and crushed her lips against his. Finally getting his shirt off, of him, she reached for his zipper the bulge sheltered by the denim of his jeans. Enclosing his hands around hers, he pushed them above her head. Planting feathery kisses on her face down and along her neckline lower to her shoulder releasing her hands he huskily said: "Don't move just focus on me."

With that said Lucas kissed her locking lips, slipping his tongue into her mouth. His tongue exploring the crevice of her mouth leaving no place foreign to him any space left unknown to him. He poured so much passion into the kiss as if trying to commit her to memory. Finally breaking for air Lucas removed her bra his eyes leaving Bea's to look down at her breasts he was going to make her feel all those things he imagined at the club come true.

He tenderly took them in his hands; using his thumbs, he stroked the lining of her nipples. Bea moaned and arched her back towards his colossal hands. Then he enclosed his oral cavity r09;­

around one enjoying the taste of her flesh her scent intoxicating. Her skin softer then the finest silk in the entire world and he loved it.

Her hands finding his black tresses running her fingers it. Enjoying the softness of Lucas's hair Bea laid there as her stole her senses rendering her helpless. Lucas took his time exploring her chest. Sliding off, of Bea's Bermuda shorts Lucas had to hold himself back at the sight of her exposed legs. She had beautiful shapely legs like that Lucas couldn't help but touch kissing her ankle first up, to her calf, then back of her knee until her reached her inner thigh placing chaste kisses along the way. She was wearing a pair of lacy black boy cut panties, hooking his index fingers to the sides he slowly pulled them down.

Bea felt subconscious now there she was naked and Lucas still dressed. Swallowing her fear Bea reached up to Lucas slowly stripping him of his clothes. There were both naked Bea to modest looked over to the side avoiding his smothering gaze as it glided over her body. Heats rising up toward her face leaving her scarlet. Lucas noticed her hesitance and placed a finger under her chin making her look up at him.

To Lucas Bea was the most beautiful women he had ever seen. Lucas needed her now. Her egg-shaped breast were know free rising with her as she breathed in and out. Her stomach was slightly rounded. Lucas let his gaze travel further down to her core covered by a thatch of curly hair lower, encased by her curvy hips leading down to her legs.

"I like your body don't ever be ashamed of it." His voice was husky and raw with emotion. His hair falling around them liked a curtain.

Lucas pushed her on her back her hands attempting to cover her intimate spots only to be stopped by Lucas. Finally, releasing her arms his hands sprung into action caressing her breast he using his thumb to stroke her nipples. Lucas moved his other hand lower using his index finger to stroke her outer folds. With his fingers, Lucas followed full length of her slit after applying pressure to her clit emitting a moan from her throat. Lucas pushing his fingers deeper into her silken folds listening to the sighs and moans Bea made and growing even more exited.

Bea's body shook against Lucas as he pushed his fingers in deeper stroking her walls. Bea's knuckles turning white from holding on so tightly to the bed sheets. Her breathing irregular as he slid in between her legs his erection scraping against her inner thigh. Lucas kissed Bea's face interlacing a hand with his. He entered her slowly only to be rushed by his desire as her legs wrapping around his waist pulling her further into her.

Bea watched Lucas admiring the moonlight as poured into the room spilling over his back giving his black hair a blue taint. Lucas kissed every spot available to him from her face down to her chest he was wild. Holding on to each other Bea urged him on faster and harder. His balls slapping against her ass finally her walls began to throb and tighten around his shift. A growl erupted from his throat as her walls contracted around him, her body spasm beneath him as she half moaned and screamed out his name. Bea let the feeling submerge her and lay waste to her doubts she could worry about tomorrow.

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Tiredness washed over her eyelids dropping as Lucas lay besides her wrapping an arm around her midsection. Pulling so her head rested against his chest her breast pressed against his side. They fell asleep in each other's arms.

Bea woke up alone she wasn't that surprised Lucas wasn't the first guy to do this and he wouldn't be the last but she couldn't help but think he was different. She wrapping as sheet around her body she sighed, then stood finding her clothes and walking towards what she thought was the bathroom. Nope, it was a closet. Lucas strolled in to the room carrying a brown bag smiling at her, showing off those glowing whites teeth of his.

"Breakfast?"

Desire: A craving, or longing for something. 2. Find someone sexually attractive; to want to have sexual relations with somebody. 3. A strong want for sexual relation with someone.

Lucas sat behind a large cherry wood desk; his head ducked low and eyes staring intently at the computer screen in front of him, his fingers moving swiftly across the keyboard. But she just wouldn't leave his thoughts. Her smooth brown skin her, the fullness of her lips, her full figured, and her endless brown eyes. He wanted nothing more but to spend the rest of the day lost inside of Bea; watching her wrath with pleasure as he coaxed the moans and sighs out of her. God, if it wasn't for his damned phone he could have spent the rest of the day learning all of her.

He stopped at the sound of Natalie, his assistant's voice over the intercom."Mr. Maxwell, Mr. Xanthus, is here to see you."

"Send him in." Lucas's finger continued to type stirring fluently across the keyword. He sat silent waiting for his friend to beleaguer him regarding his disappearance from the club.

Adonis Xanthus was a practical man he believed money was a necessity but the way Lucas worked himself was how did the Americans say it? The shit was bananas. He took his usual seat in front of his long time friend and business associate. Wait, something wasn't right. Adonis took a moment to observe his friend today Lucas's dark hair was pulled back into a low hanging ponytail. Wait, what is that peeking over the collar of his azure shirt; is that what I think it is? Adonis narrowed his eyes for a closer look and confirmed his suspensions Lucas Maxwell had a vibrant red Hickey. Well, someone had fun last night.

He couldn't stop his lips from pulling up at the corners creating a gap that showed off his pearly white teeth. This was good, no it was great.

Lucas' fingers stalled over the keyboard, he fingers laced together and sat under his chin, his elbows pressed against the armrest on either side of him. He could feel the indigo orbs of his long time friend bore into him.

The lingering stillness settled.

Not awkward by any means just silence perched there between two life long friends. A friendship forged by Lady Fortune's sick sense of humor and misery's exorbitant need for company. Lucas leaned back and sighed in into his clasped hands, he then ran a hand threw his hair knocking it out of his ponytail.

"Did you meet any beautiful women and have a world wind passionate affair?" Before Lucas could even open his mouth Adonis continued with his monologue. "Oh, how I missed the days when all I had to do was walk into a club alone and leave with a woman or two on my arm."

"I don't think that Briana would like that."

"Do you really think Briana would let me get away with that type of offence?"

"No she'd probably castrate you while you were a sleep."

"Knowing that wretched women; she'd do it while I was wide awake." Lucas smirked at that mental image of Briana, Adonis' beautiful plus sized wife; her coffee colored tresses in total disarray as she towered menacingly over he husband.

"But you married her."

"I know and I wouldn't change her for the world." His voice glossed over with absolute adoration as his lips broke into a grin. The men broke away in robust mirth, immediately calming down. "Now enough about my psychopathic wife how's New York been treating you?"

"Fine, actually but I can't shake the feeling that shit is just about to hit the fan."

"Someone had to take care of the American branch of the company."Adonis continued "and your grandfather wrote down in his last will and testament that he wanted you to take over as head of the company."

"Now, this is the part were you call her." Adonis stood to leave slipping on his jacket. Standing and ready to go, he walked to the door but not before telling Lucas. "Moma said she wants to see you some time this week or your ass is grass."

"What's his name?" Bea sat at her kitchen table, a leg tucked under her rear; making strips of confetti with a napkin. Nikko stood in front of the stove making his world famous 'French Smiles' using chocolate chips as eyes, a thin orange slice as a mouth, and powdered sugar to make frosty hair on the egg coated slices of toast.

"Who's who?"

"The guy who has you smiling like you're in a Kool-Aid commercial." Nikko tucked his blond bangs behind his ear and his sea green orbs bore into her briefly. Bea gave him a recap of her night minus the sex. Nikko glared at her knowing that wasn't the whole story and glared the rest out of her.

"You're telling me you were screwed ten ways to Sunday. By a man so gorgeous you have orgasms just by looking at him and you didn't ask him out to dinner or anything?" Bea went to open her moth only to be stopped by Nikko's falsetto voice."I should punch you in the uterus."

Bea just laughed as she listened to Nikko's triad vernacular as he swore, a few times in French. He perched a hand on a popped out hip and looked intently at her. Well, more like Nikko looked down Bea's head while Bea was stuck staring at his neck, due to their acute difference height.

"Slut…"

"Manwhore…"

"Tramp…"

"Brat…"

"Bully…"

"Ass…"

"Oh, yes please."

"Nikko you per..."

"I thought you weren't expecting any phone calls."

Bea shuffled threw her bag in search of her cell. Only stopping when she heard a 'rang' from behind her and Nikko's falsetto voice answered. "Hello?"

Bea eyes widened to the size of saucers as she stared at her best friend, with a look that could only be described as pure malice. She tried to take the phone only to have him evade her every attempt. She could only hear one side of the conversation and dammit, she wanted to know what was going on!

"Nikko Jorgen, yes I am."

"No, you called the right number."

"She's right here." Then Nikko threw the phone at her, barely catching it before it hit the floor. Nikko just smiled and took a long sip from her tea cup. She opened her mouth to curse at him. "He's still on the phone, Love."

"Hello?" She answered tentatively not really sure what to say.

"Hey." His voice was deep in husky as he spoke."It's Lucas, I was wondering what are you doing say around seven?"

"What am I doing around seven, hmm?" Nikko's eyes perked up at the conversation.

"She's not doing anything; I can have set and out the door be six!" Bea shot her friend a glare.

"I'll pick you up at six." Then he hung up. Bea frowned at the phone and then at Nikko as he sat grinning at her from her table.

"What time?"

"Six."

"Well, then lets call Gorge and do something about that head of yours."

"Hey, just got a perm two days ago."

"Sweetheart you're getting curls because you look sexy with them and you're wearing those red pumps; I brought you for your birthday."

"What have I gotten myself into?"

Bea sat fidgeting with the large flower attached to her right shoulder. The dress itself was made from jade silk and stopped just below her knees. Flowers of sorts started at her knees and wrapped around the bottom trim flowing up her right side. The neckline if you could call it that, wrapped around her right shoulder, leaving her whole left shoulder bare. It was a tight form fitting dress that Nikko had designed just for her. A pair of brown and green pumps adorned her feet which Nikko deemed the 'Fuck Me' pumps.

Nikko just looked at her, gave her a cheeky smile, then applied eye shadow the color of burnt sienna. Painted her lips a dark ginger and applied an overcoat of gloss for what he called the 'Fuck Me' affect. He added bronze to the apples of her cheeks and tried to take her glasses from her but that's where Bea drew the line. She wanted to knock him off his feet not fall over hers.

Gorge had curled her hair in the Shirley Temple style but differed in the bang by flipping it out over her right eye. By the time Gorge and Nikko were finished Bea took on a whole new façade. The only thing that would hint at the demure woman behind it were her glasses that opened up to her big coffee colored candid orbs.

At six, like clock work, Lucas stood in front of her complex with a long stemmed Daisy in his hand. He led her to a grey Lamborghini and opened the door for her. He was striking in a tailored black and white Armani suit; the shirt underneath was black and reflected against his olive skin and grey eyes. He'd left the first two buttons undone giving her a glimpse of his broad chest. The man was sin on a fucking stick and she wanted to devour him.

He looked absolutely feral, predatory in the way his eyes scorched her as he mentally undressed her with those eyes. Bea instantly felt her nipples harden into turgid peaks and her panties dampen. She pressed her thighs together trying to alleviate the ache that thinking of him had caused. She shifted in her seat adjusting the shoulder away from her sensitive breast. After her haplessness with the belt she tried to push her back into the plush leather seat behind her. She stole a glance at Lucas. Only to find him looking at her as though she was something bedazzling, if she were two shades lighter he would have noticed her blush.

"Do you like Italian?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Good. I know just the place." The guttural timber of his voice stroked Bea's insides and she felt a foreign tempo contract along her inner walls and resisted latching on to Lucas' calloused hands to alleviate the ache, by pressing her palms against either side of her thighs.

____

Lucas pulled some strings and had the restaurant setup a romantic dinner for them out on the balcony. And to be completely honest the attention was going to Bea's head. Lucas had ordered everything in Italian.

 'He's bilingual that's a plus.'

Toward the end of dinner owner came out to greet them. He was handsome with dark brown eyes, somewhat stocky with curly brown hair. He greeted Lucas like a father who hadn't seen his son in ages. "Lucas it's so good to see you, and you brought a woman, Bella!"  His accent was thick and heavy as he spoke.

"Ciao Bella, may I ask what's your name?"

'Bella the men in the restaurant have been calling me that all night.' 

"Bea."

Before he could say anything a short, coffee haired woman walked up behind him putting a hand on his arm. "Cristiano stop harassing these two can't you see he's romancing her!" She introduced herself as Signora Costa, and told them their dessert would be out shortly, and then dragged her grinning husband back into the restaurant. 

By then they were having a conversation. "I tell you no lies. I took off my bra and threw it on stage."

Lucas got the biggest grin on his face at Bea's story. He couldn't imagine the demure, Bea throwing her bra anywhere, but in a hamper.

"And here I thought you were modest."

"I had a slight lapse in judgment that night." Bea grinned at him slyly."Ok, it's your turn to tell me something equally, if not more embarrassing."

"Well, let's see, when I was in college I streaked across campus." They laughed a little more when the house band started playing. He asked her to dance and of course she said alright. They slow danced Bea's arms around his neck, her head tucked under his chin; Lucas' arms around her waist holding her close to his body. She could hear the smooth tempo of his heart.

Turns out they had more in common then Bea expected them to. Lucas went to school for architecture and business. He was born in New York but grew up in England. He was a thrill seeker and skydived almost every weekend. He was an early bird and ran every morning for 3 to 5 miles. When he smiled his dimples showed. That and he spoke several different languages.

After dessert conversation just flowed between the two. Lucas learned that Bea has a degree in psychology and is currently going for her doctorate. She was born and raised in good old New Jersey. When she is thinking her head tilts to the side and she bites her bottom lip. She likes dancing for fun.

After they finished dinner they waited for the valet to come around with Lucas' car. Somehow their hands became interlaced with each other and neither seemed to mind.

"I hope you enjoyed your dinner, Signora!" The owner's wife called out from the door.

____

Lucas had a gentleman and walked her to her door. He kissed her hand, then left. Not before leaving her hot and needy. They were outside her door saying goodnight when he kissed her and it was not one of those little pecks. It was a full on evasion, his lips fell on hers in a passionate drop.

And consequences be dammed Bea was ready to do anything he asked. After there thirty minute make out session. He could have asked her to strip and she would have. But instead he pulled away from her and kissed her forehead mumbling something about 'taking it slow' leaving her hot and bothered in front of her door.

Bea entered her apartment in a dewy eyed and dazed her lips kiss swollen. She shrugged out of her dress, slipping it onto the wooden hanger hanging from the knob of her armoire. Nikko was very peculiar at how his creations had to be washed so every time he made something for her to wear. He'd demand that she put it on a hanger so he could wash it. After her shower Bea fell into her full sized bed and huffed when the shower proved useless to the ache settling between her legs. She tugged on her large nightshirt, tying her silk scarf around her head after she managed to comb her curls down to a wrap.

'Damn that sexy man'

__

His hands slid over her thighs, his lips traced her neck. Her lips parted and moans erupted from the back of her throat. Her hands fell into his dark hair fingertips stroking his scalp. Orbs oh so grey looking down at her lovingly. A raspy voice whispering promises of endless passion. Lovingly whispering, 'You never disappoint me'

Ring...Ring...Ring

Bea's replay of last nights dreams were cut short by the impatient ring of her house phone. After stepping out of the shower, wrapping a cream colored towel around her body. Slipping on her fluffy bunny slippers she ambled down the hall.

Ring...Ring...Ring

"Hello?"

"Have you read the news yet?"

"Nikko wha-"

"Answer the question, Amie"

"No-"

"Be right over." Then the line went dead. Huffing Bea's walked over to her front door snatching up the newspaper from the floor. And she nearly passed out.

'What the hell.'

About an hour later Nikko sat at Bea's kitchen table, his blond hair pulled back into a pony tail staring at the front page of the Tattler featuring a widespread of non-other then Lucas Masters the byte line read: Is New York's # 1 bachelor not so single anymore?

Displaying a picture of Lucas and Bea at 'Angelo's' slow dancing on the balcony while, looking into each others eyes. And another one with the two holding hands, while leaving the restaurant.

"He's gorgeous, you lucky tramp!" Nikko's falsetto voice yelled to her from the stove which happens to be only four feet away. Then midsentence Bea's doorbell ring, she goes to answers the door.

"I came to make sure you weren't harassed by anyone." Weird butterflies flutter in her belly at the thought of Lucas being worried about her."That won't happen again I took care of it."

Nikko watched the scene from the kitchen making oh my god gestures at Lucas' back. Doing stupid things like licking his lips or rubbing his nipples, Bea's had to bit her lips to hold back her laughter. Shooing him back to the kitchen she turned her attention back to Lucas.

Lucas stole her lips automatically turning her into a puddle of goo. Kissing the shit out of her, she wasn't holding back any laughs then. After a short tonsil hockey match and Lucas telling her he'd call her tonight. She walked him to the door in a daze then fell down to the floor after shutting the door.

"Oh, baby."

"Oh, baby is right did you see the ass he was sporting?" Nikko admired after seeing Bea frown at him. "Sorry, Amie but he is hot. If he wasn't straight I'd bag him."

"What am I going to do with you?"

"Send me on an all expenses paid cruise? "

Denial: 1- a statement saying that something is not true or not correct. 2-a refusal to grant something desired. 3-Refusal to place unpleasant facts.

"Five fucking years it took her five fucking years to finally talk to me?" Nikko whispered, mutely voice breaking off as Bea wrapped her arms around him. His knees fall out from under him and in turn they both fall to the floor, his head rest on her shoulder."Five fucking years wasted because she wanted to be a stubborn twat."

The shoulder of her top becomes damp and she knows all she can do is comfort him. She wraps her arms tighter around him; she whispers soothing words into his ear. He clutches onto her like man would a lifesaver. "Five fucking years and she calls me because she wants something."

"Nikko ca-" She started ready to come up with excuse for Lilly. But Nikko cut her off before she could talk continuing in his rant oblivious to his surrounding

"She kicked me out of her life; treated me like a pariah." He pulled away from her throwing his head back. "All my phone calls left unanswered. My letters returned… unopened."

"I had to find out after OUR mother's funeral the she was dead."He threw his lanky arms in the air in as if reprieving his sister. He fist pressed at his sides as if he willed them to do so. "Shit if anyone's fucked in the head it's that bitch."

"I'll make some Earl Grey, okay?" She new Nikko well enough to know her didn't want her sympathy, just her company. Even if it is just for a while, he went through an emotional purging. She stood and saunter back to her kitchen. She seized her stool and moved to her cabinet searching for Nikko's special tea, his Earl Grey.

"Can we move our lunch to a different day?" She spoke silently into the phone, while Nikko nursed a bottle of Grey Goose she'd tried to take from him a few times earlier. She paced the length of her kitchen cord entangling around her fuzzy slippers. Her mind was still reeling from the night before the sex was out of this world. He was smart, charming, and beautiful what the hell was he doing with her? He could have any on he wanted why her? She'd read about all his model girlfriends. Hell she even saw a few approach him during their dates when she'd get up to use the restroom sometimes the waitress would slip her his number when they though she wasn't watching.

Shit what if he was playing her? She didn't think her heart could take another blow like that. What if he's using her? For what she didn't know but by then the paranoia had started to fill her head. And once it started she was helpless against the onslaught. Lucas spoke suddenly as if in tuned with her mentally.

"It wasn't just sex." His voice was low and reminded her of a growl. Slightly thrown off her paranoia wagon by his bass she scrambled to put together letters.

"Woo-haat" She cleared her throat and tried yet again. "What?" Even then it didn't sound as confident as she wanted it to. She pushed a stray curl away from her eye tucking it behind her ear.

"Last night wasn't just sex. I want be in a relationship… with you."

"I do to…" she couldn't bring herself to finish her sentence afraid he'd think her stupid. Lucas waited he could feel the 'but' welling up in her throat as if it was lodged in his. He had his argument ready to rebut any excuse she may have about why they shouldn't be together.

"Bea, baby last night was more then sex. I've marked you as mine and there's no turning back without even giving us a chance." His voice rung threw the receiver the proud bass of his voice seemed to echo bouncing back even louder then before. "All I'm asking is for a chance to prove that we have something even if you won't own up to it."

"Luc, I'm just," insecure, scared, falling hopelessly for you, "not use to a relationship."

"Well Sweet, buckle up cause you're in for the ride of your life.

"This feels odd." Nikko asked. His head on her lap while she idly ran her fingers through his blond curls. "I'm normally the one who takes care of you, Amie."

"I know but now it's my turn to take care of you." Her fingers stalled in his hair and for a brief second, she watched a silent tear run down his face, gone so fast she swore she imagined it.

"Amie make me laugh, I don't like feeling shitty." He wined from her lap stealing a sip from his 'Shit happens' mug. "I'm not getting any happier with you silent, Amie"

"Remember, Senior Prom?"

"When your date stood you up?" Nikko looked up at her and gave her a look that said 'where the hell is this going.' Bea had to bit back her laughter. The question mark was clear across his face by then and it took all she had not to laugh her ass off. He looked completely lost at that moment and he scrambled to put two and two together.

"Yeah-"

"Amie, I said happy, this isn't happy."

"Yeah it is; remember what you did to him?" Nikko make that 'O' with him mouth. He watched the impish grin spread across Bea's face and couldn't help but smile.

"I put liquid heat in his jockstrap and rubbed his Football uniform with poison ivy."

"Wahoo, strut it girl!" The air was thick with laughter the strobe lights moved across the stage in delicate movements; bathing the Marilyn Monroe impersonator in a soft light, as he strutted across the stage singing happy birthday, to a large Asian man who Bea suspected to be his husband. Nikko sat beside her cheering along with the others."You own the stage; show them what you're working with!"

The loud cheers had defended her temporally leaving hearing with a low hum in her ears. Scotty the waitress had made her round giving Bea the sprite she ordered. Nikko had given up drinking away his troubles after Bea poured his Goose in the fern plant next to the bar. Damn women wouldn't let him sulk so he did the next best thing when the 'Girls' came out and plucked people randomly off of the floor and made the unlucky participant dance with them on the stage. He volunteered her. Maybe then he could have his drink. But today Nikko wasn't that lucky the bartender had given him a coke and told him, Bea demanded he be cut off. Damn women.

With a bit of a struggle the pulled her back stage and made her put a blonde wig on and a large white fur.

The crown quieted as the 'Girls' broke out into their own rendition of 'September' by Earth, Wind, and Fire. They had squished Bea in the middle and danced to the solid oldie.

They crowd went wild and Bea was struggling to keep up with the energy. The sight itself was comical and for the first time in what felt like years Nikko's body relaxed and he just let go.

The silent trickle of rain could be her outside her apartment window. They sat opposite facing each other. The silent hum of Nikko's cell cutting through the nostalgic memories they buried themselves under. Then the low somber of Nikko broke the silence.

"She has Cancer."

"What?"

"She called me because she needs some of my bone marrow."

Tenderness: showing hurt or sensitive when touched or pressed. Showing care, gentleness, and feeling farewell

"Nikko it's eight o'clock in the morning you need to eat, give me that damn bottle," she stood in front of him one hand propped on her hip; the other held out in front of her, palm exposed, demanding the bottle of Vodka Nikko contentedly sipped from. "Nikko, just give me the fucking bottle."

"Uh-oh we can't have Miss Straight-and-Narrow cursing now, can we?" Nikko kicked his head back taking prolonged drinks from the bottle, exposing the strong cords of his neck. His blond hair was messy and stood up on edge while those beautiful verdant orbs had taken on a glass-eyed appearance reminding Bea that she had to get that bottle from him. "Amie, I feel like my heart was hit with one of those big 18 wheelers."

'Well you look like you were ran over by an 18 wheeler' she mentally said to herself not daring to say the word out loud in an attempt to avoid hurting his feelings. Because as much as she hated to say Nikko was very supercilious. If it was one thing Nikko took pride in it was his appearance.

"I'm sure he's just as miserable as you." Bea tried to comfort the distressed Nikko. She didn't know whether to hug him or beat him with her shoe. He'd been like this for the last two weeks--prattling on about George. Nikko was one mean bitch when he suffered.

"He better be. Shit, nobody told me this love thing was this difficult." He swallowed a mouthful from the bottle and his eyes glossed over slightly reminding her of the China dolls that her grandmother had collected when she was a child. "Didn't I tell you that leading that man on would end badly?"

"Well if it isn't the hoe call the homo nasty." If she hadn't known Nikko for what felt like forever she would have felt offended by his analogy. Nikko sneered and rolled his eyes at her before he took another swig from the bottle clutched between his index finger and thumb. "Oh, now you want to say I told you so."

"Nikko it's not the end of the world--just eat something please." She implored with her eyes big and guileless voice. Nikko didn't know what it was about Bea that made her so damn lovable; he couldn't bring himself to be mad at her or mean. God help anyone who tried. I bet her character would blow them away.

Nikko was livid and depressed but he couldn't bring himself to say anything rude or hurtful to her. She was and would always be the first person he'd call when he and George got into fights. His alliée when things went from great to shitty, kind of like he felt now.

He no longer filtered the words between his mouth and brain; he blamed it on the one and a half bottles of vodka. He didn't want to listen to her act as his conscience right now; all he wanted was to forget. He started to fall into that oh so familiar alcohol induced hazed he'd become close friends with over the last week or so.

"You have to talk to him eventually." That woke him up with a start. To hell I will.

Nikko knew she was right but he didn't want her to be. He knew for sure if he was going to face George, Nikko was determined to look his best. He collected himself and rose-- stumbling past her into his bathroom. He tugged off his clothes and stepped under the warm spray of water. His tense muscles relaxed beneath the spray of water.

~~~

Bea stood in front of Nikko's stove. One hand on the skillet while the other poured eggs into the pan next to it. Her curly rust colored tresses pulled back into a low hanging ponytail. She was glowing, but her eyes as always displayed the mixed emotions she was feeling. She liked George and knew that Nikko was head over heels in love with him. Now all she had to do was find a way to get them back together again.

"Nikko, your sausages are almost ready!" she called from the kitchen.

"I wonder what your boyfriend would say, if I told him that I'm the one that taught you how to suck a dick properly." Bea almost dropped his plate. She could feel the heat rush up her face and thanked God for her copper complexion. She knew he said that on purpose just to hear her stutter.

"W-wwell w-ww-e - I-I havvnt..."

"Speak a little clearer darling, I don't speak bashful." He loved to tease her.

"I haven't you know." She tried to push the words past her throat but failed miserably.

"Haven't what?" He asked his flustered friend. "Sucked his dick?"

He was answered by silence. He looked over at her and she was staring at the ceramic tiles beneath her feet. Her favorite raging homo was back embarrassing her one day at a time.

Nikko wandered into the living room with his hands full of hair products. He refused to let himself go out when his head looked like something straight out of the Addams Family. He sat down on the couch one leg tucked under his rump the other hanging down until it touched the floor. He grabbed the remote to the stereo and turned turned it up until his ears felt like they were going to pop.

I'm bringing sexy back.
Them other boys don't know how to act.
I think you're special, what's behind your back?
So turn around and I'll pick up the slack.
Take 'em to the bridge
Dirty babe
You see the shackles
Baby I'm your slave
I'll let you whip me if I misbehave
It's just that no one makes me feel this way
Take 'em to the chorus

He stood and began moving to the familiar beats his hips swaying his hair being damned to hell as he found his groove again. He knew he looked absolutely positively mad; barefoot, hair in complete disarray, dancing in front of blaring speakers "Amie, come dance with me!"

It took him a while to realize she was laughing at him. "If you don't get your ass over here I'm going to drag you."

She couldn't stop laughing at him. Her shoulders shook from her hunched position. He watched her press the back of her hand against her lips, hiding her smile. He always hated when she did that when they were kids because she had such a beautiful smile. He grabbed her wrist and dragged her over. She shook her head at him but despite her initial objections, she found her hips swaying to the techno beat.

I'm bringing sexy back
Them other fuckers don't know how to act
Come let me make up for the things you lack
'Cause you're burning up I gotta get it fast
Take 'em to the bridge

Bea swung her hips in attempt to get into some type of rhythm and failed miserably. Whoever said that all black women had rhythm lied their asses off. Nikko couldn't stop the smirk from dancing across his lips, "Amie, you need to relax."

She followed his instructions and found herself twirled across the room. He felt all the anger and sadness he had packed up inside drain away and he lost himself in her laughter.

I'm bringing sexy back
You mother fuckers watch how I attack
If that's your girl you better watch your back
Cause she'll burn it up for me and that's a fact
Take 'em to the chorus

Caress: to touch or stroke somebody or something affectionately or pressed. To touch, pass over, or affect somebody in a soothing or pleasant way

"When does he have the surgery?" Lucas inquired before he laid a kiss on the crown of Bea's head. Her head rested on the broad expanse of his chest. One of his hands ran up her arm and back in one sweeping motion, the other ran through her hair amazed at the soft yet thick texture. She could feel heat exude off him and permeate her clothes, tenderly caressing the flesh hidden beneath the thin material of her chemise.

"They want to test him first, and if he's a match he'll go under the knife as soon as possible." She answered through a muffled yawn. If he kept that up, she'd fall asleep on him and refuse to move for the rest of the night. "I just get so nervous sometimes and I'm not even the one going under the knife."

"That's understandable youfre best friends with him." He tried to commiserate with her. His body responding to her proximity, he could smell her Camille shampoo, and practically taste the rich honey of her skin. "If it was Adonis or Moma, I'd be nervous too."

"Lucas?" Come on you can do it. She wanted to ask him what he saw in her. However, she found herself tongue-tied and feeling like five different kinds of stupid. Frowning at her idiotic thoughts, she frowned and tried to focus on something else.

"What's on your mind, Beautiful?" He found his self-staring at the beautiful pout of her lips. He felt the strongest desire to bite and mark her as his. He wanted to pick her up, carry her to the bedroom, strip her of all her clothes, and make love to her.

'Make love?' He'd never used that term when he wanted to sleep with a woman, but with Bea, that's what best described what they did. He'd fucked many women before he met her, he never did the dating thing just what was required to bed her. However, with Bea it was different; something about her pulled him under and made him want her. No, she didn't look like the women he normally dated but the sight of her did things to his body that he didnft care to explain.

"Forget it it's not important." There goes your chance. She silently berated herself and pressed her lips against the hard planes of his chest. Then all she could think about was getting him naked.

"Oh, do you want me there?" His question.

"Want you where..." naked and inside of me? Yes.

"At the hospital with you, I don't want you to be alone."

"I'm not going to be alone. I'll have George and Julia."

"Oh, ok." She started to fall into a light slumber. Lucas stared at the program on the television. She basked in his scent it wasn't cologne. It was a comforting ferment of apples and pure unadulterated male.

~~~

Julia was leaving Adam. She wouldn't take another beating or 'accidental' fall down the stairs. Julia had to get away from Adam before it cost her, her life. Nikko's situation offered the perfect scapegoat. Adam had finally fallen asleep with the aid of the Ambien she had crushed and mixed into his soup hopefully she hadn't killed him, just knocked him out for a few hours. She moved frantically making sure she had everything she needed money, clothes and other mislanious. All she needed were the keys that were located not so conveniently in his back pocket.

Her hands shook as she reached for them. He rolled over; she jerked back, nearly knocking over the lamp behind her. She closed her eyes calming herself down preying that he did not wake up and catch her. After extracting the keys from his back pocket, she slid away from him as one would when recoiling from hot metal. She dumped her bags at the front door and moved to the back of the house passed her bedroom until she reached a familiar door with seahorses drawn on it.

She moved silently with purpose and sprung into action. She stopped once she reached the crib centered in the room. Her beautiful 9-month-old baby boy laid staring up at her. He stared at her with the eyes of an older person; they penetrated your soul and then right through you. She had to do this know before it was too late before he broke her, before he damaged her beautiful son.

"Hey baby, come on you're going to visit your aunties." He cooed up at her and gave her a toothless smile. She kissed his forehead and cradled him in her arms.

"We're going to go stay with Auntie Bea awhile, would you like that?" He cooed again.

"She's dying to see you." He giggled and took a small fist in to his gum lined mouth and begins to chew. She had it all planned out, she jump on the earliest flight she could and Bea would pick her up at the airport, she'd stay at her place for awhile at least until she found a place to rent. Her best friend wouldn't turn her down no matter what types of disagreements they had in the past. Julia knew Bea wouldn't hold a grudge over something that happened years ago, right?

Oh, God what if Felicia was there and decided she wanted nothing to do with her; Julia didn't know what to do. Face the sister she'd abandoned to follow a man, who had tried to kill her at more times then she cared to count. She slipped her son into his winter gear and put him in his seat. Julia preyed her sister would welcome her and nephew in with open arms. Bea and Felicia were Julia's only hope.

She avoided looking at mirrors for a reason. Her black eye was beginning to show threw that heavy layer of make up, she caked around her eyes. She'd take care of that after she ditched the car.

~~~

"Bea?" Lucas' hand was still moving hypnotically across the expanse of Bea's back. Whenever his hand brushed her lower back, he'd briefly stop and draw lazy circles with his index finger. When she gave no response, he repeated his self, "Bea, baby?"

"Hmm?" she sighed and rubbed her nose against the soft material of his tee covered torso.

"I was wondering if you'd come with me to a family diner."  She smiled into his chest, shrugging herself awake. She moved up until her breasts pressed up against his chest. His hands fell to her waist and she shuttered at the contact. 'Wait, family? Oh, shit.'

"You mean you want to me to meet your family?" She never dated a man that wanted her to meet his parents if anything they'd hide her or they'd dump her before things got that serious. Lucas didn't hide her or act ashamed of being with her in public. Lucas presented a problem. What if he was playing her? 'No, he wouldn't do that' She found herself hesitant about being close to him after his declaration. What if this turns out to be a cruel trick or a dream?

'Don't wake me. Just let me stay here.'

"Yes, they want to meet you and I want you to meet them." Although she couldn't see it, she knew he had the infamous smirk on his face. "As your Man my job is to keep you happy and satisfied, very satisfied." He puffed out his chest to emphasize his point. She buried her face in his chest once she caught the double innuendo to what he said.

"My man," doesn't he sound a tab bit too smug? She pushed herself up into a horizontal position. Her head cocked to the side as her brought a warm colossal hand to rest against her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned into his hand before speaking again "Don't you think we're moving just a tad bit to fast?"

"Nope," 'if I had my way I'd a permanent addition in your life.' However, he left that lad tidbit to his self. He didn't want to scare her away with his feelings. "Will you?"

He already knew she'd try to find excuses or reasons to bail out but that was all right he'd just spent the rest of the night coaxing a breathy 'Yes' out of her. He looked over to the coffee table at his copy of 'Black Beauty' that Bea had fallen asleep reading earlier.

Lucas couldn't help the grin that had unblushing tugged at the corners of his lips. His Bea had turned out to be quite the bookworm, he discovered that when he showed her his personal library. He watched in complete fascination as she glided from self to shelf with an unbridled glee."You really aren't like most women."

"I'm special." She stuck her tongue out at him and he watched the pick appendage with hooded eyes before he leaned up and playfully nipped at her bottom lip.

"Very, now what type of story?"

"I don't care as long as it's your voice." She managed to squeak out before he tugged her back down on to his chest. He hands fell to their original positions one on her back moving in that soothing motion she loved. The other played in her hair winding and unwinding the corkscrew curls around his finger. He just wanted to be close to her, this was their time together no phones ringing, no extreme shyness, or pulling away from him, just them together.

Lucas told her, his favorite story that Moma had took her and Adonis during their Indian summers.

Bea had fallen asleep on Lucas' chest to the sound of his voice along with the calming ministrations of his hands. Lucas laid one more kiss on her forehead before he slipped off into sleep to the rhyme of her breathing.

~~~

The sun shined down bright blinding the artificial redhead. The strident clink of her Gucci heels brought eyes gravitating in her direction. A cheeky smile graced her lips and she slipped on her Gucci shade pulling her Prada bag closer to her paying very little attention to the catcalls some felt need to call out at her.

The dark denim of her jeans clung to her hips giving her a fair amount of shape. Her lime green baby-doll hugged her causing her bosoms to protrude from her slender form. She was there for only one reason to get her man or cause a scene.

~~~

Bea awoke to the sizzle of grease. She sighed at the feel of silk against her bare thighs. Wait, bare thighs? She swore she fell asleep with pants on. She sat up, blinked, and then looked down at herself. A large t-shirt replaced the jade chemise and black slacks she had fallen asleep wearing. The hardwood was chilly beneath her size seven feet; she sauntered out of the bedroom and down the hall into the kitchen.

Lucas stood in front of the stove stirring something in a large cast iron pan. He was shirtless and barefoot, his jeans lying precariously low on his hips. His hair was down lying across his broad shoulders like a dark shawl falling haphazardly in his face. She watched his dark brows knit together in concentration as he worked with whatever was in the pot.

She moved over to the counter taking a seat on the elevated chair. The time next to the stove danged and Lucas grabbed two potholders and opened the stove. She watched him bend over 'have mercy' and pull a pan from the oven. Her breath hitched and that was all it took for Lucas' stormy grey to lock on her."Welcome to the land of the living, Sleeping Beauty"

He could keep his eyes from scanning the curves his shirt did little to conceal. The hem teased the fleshy part of her thighs and he could feel blood rush from his head to his already hardening erection. he watched as her nipples harden into two turgid peaks that he wanted to fondle and suckle.

She licked her lips and felt the weight of his eyes on her looking her over with hooded eyes. He watched her shift in her seat; she clenched her knees together in attempt to alleviate the ache that settled between her thighs. Her eyes scanned his lean physique starting at his bare feet moving up to his jean-clad legs up, lingering on his zipper, unfastened button up, that washboard stomach, and settled on his face. Only to find his eyes looking back at her, his lips curved into a smirk.

"Like what you see?" His eyes traveled her figure, lingering on select places. She could feel the heat creep up her neck and turned her face away from him. "I know; I do." He grinned at her."You look beautiful, Darling."

"Whatcha making?"

"Buffalo wings and a deep dish pizza with extra cheese and pepperoni, just the way you like it."

"How did you know that?"

"Nikko called earlier and asked me to apologize on his behalf; he said something about missing pizza night?"

"Oh," Nikko is a dead man. She mentally vowed to herself next time she saw him she'd set his ass on fire. "How'd he get your number?"

"He called my office earlier to remind me that if I hurt you in anyway that I could just kiss my ass goodbye"

"Adonis and Natalie found it funny." She watched his fight to keep the grin of his face. "I assured him that I have no intensions once so ever of harming you."

"Natalie?" Who's Natalie? Is she attractive? She could feel the jealousy claw it's was into that back of her head and plant ideas of Lucas and Natalie together. Bea imagined her as a soft brunet with sultry blue eyes that stood out on her beautifully curved face.

"My assistant, you'd like her she's funny. So did you decide if you wanted to attend the dinner with me?" She remembered him asking about that before she conked out.

"Oh, umm I really don't think this is a good idea," Come on just say it and leave not room for argument. "In fact it's a really bad idea"

"Why?"

"I just don't think it's a good idea." Or, a very sane one.

"Ok." 'That was too easy. He's up to something, I just don't know what.' He'd just have to persuade her, his way.

"What are you up to?" She could almost hear the gears in his head turning.

"You'll say yes." He smirked at her then went back to work.

"How?" Her eyes narrowed at him and she tried to piece together his cryptic messages.

"Do you really want to know?" He opened up the cabinet, pulled a giant plate out ran some hot water over it, pilled buffalo wings on the plate, and sat it on the table.  'Not when you keep looking at me like you want to bend me over on the table.'

"No." 'I change my mind.' She turned her body away to hide her face. He dragged his eyes over her one more time and returned to the stove.

~~~

George felt like shit. It had been two week since their fight and Nikko hadn't called him or anything but, he refused to be the one to apologize. Nope this time he wasn't going to break. Still George couldn't help but worry what if something had happened? Did Nikko remember to feed the cat? All he had wanted to do was show Nikko that he wasn't a doormat.

'Ring...ring...ring.' His phone was ringing but he found his self-taking a long drag from his cigarette instead. His coffee remained untouched in front of him. A five o'clock shadow covered his face and his hair had grown some.

He took another drag from his cigarette and felt the breeze as it swept across his face. He closed his eyes and ignored the person who had taken a seat in front of him. Assuming it was the college girl who had been making eyes at him earlier with her friends, he was prepared to burst her bubble until he opened his eyes. His dark eyes met sea green. 'Nikko' Nikko sat in front of George in all his glory not the least bit changed.

"How are you?" He wanted to make light convocation first.

"What do you want?" He didn't feel like dancing around the truth.

"You."

"Nikko-"

"Just hear me out," he held his hands up to signify his claim."That's all I ask."

"You've got five minutes go." 'Better be good to.'

~~~

Bea never hated cell phones as much as she did right now. She was on her back panting from Lucas' form of persuasion. They were on his bed and she was so close. After she made the stupidest bet in her life, she'd automatically regretted it. Lucas had bet her he could make her agree to go with him to the dinner within the next hour. Stupidly she agreed. Next thing she knew Lucas had her naked and whining for release.

Just as he parted, her legs to enter her, his phone rang. He ignored it the first to times but after the fourth time he stopped his ministrations. Licked his fingers clean and answered the phone with his opposite hand, the one that had been fondling her breast. She pouted as he clothed his self."I'm sorry sweet I've got to take care of this."

She moved to dress so he could lock his apartment but was surprised when Lucas stopped her."Where are you going?"

"Home?" She hadn't meant for it to sound like a question but the look in his eyes threw her off guard.

He frowned at her, he didn't want her to leave having her there just felt so right too him. He wanted her there when her left and when he came back. "No, you aren't going anywhere."

He sat her back down on the bed and kissed her, long and hard."I'll be back in an hour and I'll finish what I started."

"Look here, I need someone to stay with her while I'm in the hospital." Nikko spoke loudly over the phone as he moseyed pass Maple and Crenshaw. Ignoring the hustle and bustle of the city around him, he moseyed by the glaring pedestrians. "I swear to God, if you're not on the next plane; I will hop on a plane and kick your ass my own damn self!"

Nikko listened to her half-assed excuses and reproached Felicia through the phone's receiver. He pulled a cigarette from his breast pocket fully intending to curb the anxiety that had climbed its way up from the pit of his stomach until it was clawing at the recesses of his mouth. He swallowed hard attempting to push the anxiety back down were it belonged.

Nikko was going to therapy; he wasn't too happy about it but George refused to move back in until he did. He cringed at the thought.

He listened to Felicia as she tried to refute his claim and come up with excuses as to why her narrow ass wasn't on a plane to New York like she promised. He'd have to open up a can of whoop ass and when Nikko whooped ass, he whooped ass. She tried to argue back but Nikko wasn't having that; he set her straight right there with four words.

"Your sister needs you." Then Nikko hung up. He flicked the bud of his cigarette away and ran a nervous hand through his hair; he seemed to be doing that a lot lately. He stopped in front of a large brick building that looked like a remodeled apartment minus the intercom.

He took in his surroundings--the leering camera which was mounted to the essential brick. He closed his eyes attempting to pull himself together. Nikko moved through the glass doors 'Just breathe' he kept telling himself that it was worth it to get George back. 'This shit better be worth it.'

It had to be.

~~~~~

'Oh shit.' Bea's chocolate eyes bore into the empty drawer as if a snake was about to pop out any moment and bite the hell out of her. Her eyes gravitated to the closet looking over the barren space Lucas had made for her next to his things. 'Oh, shit this is bad.' She pinched herself once, twice, three times to make sure she wasn't going off her rocker, 'So much for a hallucination'.  She ran nervous hands down her thighs attempting to rid herself of sweaty palms. Nikko was laughing his ass off wherever he was; he had to be because she couldn't find a damn thing funny.

Lucas gave Bea a dresser drawer and some closet space. He even went as far as to give her a place for her toothbrush and she was freaking out. Laugh all you want but to her a drawer was serious. Her breathing sped up and her eyes became unfocused--shit she was having a panic attack. She backed away from the offending space and slipped on one of his shirts. On bare feet, she padded down the hall into the living room, collecting the clothes they'd hurriedly pulled off each other, while in the throes of uninhibited passion. Bea bit her lip as images of the previous night assaulted her already sensitized nerves.

He had to fuck up the afterglow with his proclamation. Lucas giving her space in his place scared her out of her mind. She was extremely close to running. She wanted to convince herself that everything she and Lucas had was a cruel joke but her common sense that wouldn't let her thoughts transform. 'Why go through all this if he wasn't serious?'

She still had an hour before he came back from the gym. She had to get out before the walls swallowed her whole. On rushed legs she ran back to the bedroom and threw on a pair of Lucas' shorts, she pulled at the drawstring until she felt a sting at her waist. She clutched her car keys in her hand, so tight they cut into the palm of her hand.

Propelled by a sudden burst of energy she ran. Her heartbeat thumped angrily at her chest; her eyes were unfocused and she could feel sweat run down the curve of her back. However, all she could see were the walls closing in on her. Her bottom lip was bleeding from the pressure of her teeth against the thin skin.

She had to get out, now. She omitted the elevator all together and opted for the stairs. Bea clutched the railing so tight the nails on her middle, index, and ring fingers broke. She could hear her own breathing; feel her pulse in her ears muting out the outside world.

She made it to ground level; the door attendant looked at her strangely. He must have been talking to her but all she saw were his lips moving. His hands fell to her shoulders and he sat her down on the dark plush couch in the lobby. She watched him move to the desk and grab the phone. He must have gotten through to whomever he called because his lips moved fast. He kept shooting nervous glances in her direction. However, Bea didn't care all she wanted was to get out. She stood on fawn like legs and made it out the rotating doors.

~~~~

She only made it home by the grace of God. Anything after that reminded her of a Jackson Pollack meshed to the inside of her skull. She tore off the clothes she'd been wearing and ran to her shower, turning on the hot water. A soft whimper left her lips once she realized what she was doing. She bit back a hollow sob. She hadn't had a panic attack in a long time. She thought she'd stopped this her junior year in high school.

She wasn't sure how long she'd been in her bathroom or in the shower for that matter but the sun was setting. On top of that, she was hungry, extremely hungry. She moved through her living room and stopped short when she heard her answering machine beep. She reached out and pushed the large play button Lucas' concerned voice filled the room.

Message 1

'Baby, Norman called are you all right?' His voice was heavy with concern and she could feel a strange ache in her chest.

Message 2

'Bea? Baby, please pick up.' The husky timbre of his voice caressed her bones sending a shiver down her spine. It filled the room and gave her comfort s if he was there with her, loving her.

Message 3

'You're really starting to worry me, sweetheart. Please, pick up just so I know you're ok.' He sounded desperate and she felt like a harpy for worrying him like this.

Message 4

'Dammit baby, answer the phone.' She could hear the sound of trffic in the background and knew he must have been on his way over.

Message 5

'Are you there it's me, Julia. How are you? I'm good. Funny story--actually remember when you told me your door was always open? Well, I'm about to board a plane to New York. Umm, I guess I'll just see you when I get there.' Her movements stalled at the sound of her sister's soft melodic voice. She could hear the sound of a baby cooing in the background and nearly cried. 

~~~

"Are you going to eat that? He wants me to go to therapy," After spearing a sausage from Bea's untouched plate with a nod of her head. Nikko observed his best friend. She'd been quiet since he arrived and cooked breakfast. She'd barely touched her breakfast and she was staring intensely out the window. Nikko gushed on about his first therapy session attempting to fill the pregnant silence between them. "Me, can you believe that?"

Nikko scrunched up his face as if it was the most absurd thing he'd ever heard. Bea stared hard at him, green orbs clashed with brown orbs, and an unspoken connection was made. 'That fucking Julia!'

"That's good; you have some things you need to work at." Pulling her eyes away from his, she blew on the hot contents of her mug. Bringing the mug to her lips, she drank the hot contents which slightly burned her throat. "I mean you do want help right?"

"I want George." Nikko deadpanned and Bea felt the strangest need to beat him with her slipper. She looked at him for a while. Then looked back out the window and tried to figure out her own musings but all she could think about was Julia. "I'm doing this to get us back on track."

"That's not what I asked." His eyes bore right back into her eyes. "I don't need therapy. I'm not a nutcase. Shit, that didn't come out right!" Nikko ran a stressed hand through his hair and scrambled his brain for the right words but none came to mind.

"Nutcase, I'll let that remark slide with no problem but you are looking at this with the wrong mind set. You go in claiming you don't need help, you won't get help. You can't go in just for George's state of mind. You have to do it for yourself or you won't be able to say 'I did it and I am a changed person for me' and not because youfre convinced it's the only way you can get George back."

"But-"

"Therapy is give and take. You can't expect it to be effective if you aren't going to be open. It can only be helpful if you're working with your doctor. Nikko, I love you even if you are four different kinds of crazy. But promise me you'll do this for yourself."

"Fine, I promise." He finally relented but it didn't feel sincere to her but she just shrugged it off knowing Nikko.

"No, if you really plan on going back do it for yourself not for him."

"Bea?"

"You can spend all the time you want doing what you think will make him happy, but understand this only you can make yourself happy."

"Nikko you can't go through your whole life running and assuming that George is going to break your heart."

"Look who's talking. You're just as afraid as I am only I'll admit it."

New York was still the screaming city she had left all those years ago. Julia could smell the exhaust fumes emanate from the cab's clamoring heater. She'd spent the last 5 hours on a plane and the jetlag caught up with her. She'd destroyed her cell phone in an angry fit and left her car in the care of the airline's security back in California. She wasn't going back; neither was her son, not if she could help it. She hailed down a cab the second she was off the plane. Her son buckled in securely by her side.

The cabbie was a man, in his late forties, with a mushroom nose and beady eyes that scanned her face. He flirted with her every chance he got. His hair was a wiry grey that resembled a storm cloud covering up the balding crown of his head. His lips were thin and carried a blue tint as well as a bushy moustache and he had a brusque New Yorker accent that made it hard for her to catch his meaning.

"Is a pretty woman likes you vistin' a boyfriends," he eyed her through the rearview mirror. His salt and pepper eyebrows rose in inquiry, "or you relocating or sumpt'um?"

Julia took a moment to decipher the man's thick tongue. "I relocated for a new job." She tried to keep her answers concise and looked out the window.

About thirty minutes into the ride, her son, Marcus, began to fuss; she placed a soothing hand on his belly as if to say 'it's alright' but his whines became louder and tears began to form at the corners of his eyes. She told the cabbie to take her to the nearest café or restaurant.

There was a little café on the corner of Cherry and Smith, tossing the fare at cabbie. She pulled her son's carrier from the vehicle and the cabbie handed her, her suitcase.

The temperature inside was refreshingly warmer compared to the chilly winter air outside. She found a vacant seat not that far from the Barista's counter. Julia pulled her son from his carrier, and reached for one of his premade bottles. She held her son extremely close; his head nodding on her shoulder, one arm wrapped securely around his back, the other under the backs of his knees, her hand clutching the bottle.

"Excuse me." She tried to capture the green haired Barista's attention. Julia could hear the music blaring from the younger woman's headphones as she turned her head to the side, her head bumping to the ear-piercing beat. Marcus giggled into her sweater his little hands grasping the ends of her hair. His baldhead bobbed up on her shoulder with glee, then leaned off into her neck. Julia tried capturing the Barista's attention again. "Excuse me."

"Oh, I'm so sorry Miss, how may I help you?" Julia took a moment to observe the younger woman. The hair on her head was dyed lime green and stood up in stilted spikes. She had model potential; tall and slender with facial features that one could never forget. Even with the nose and eyebrow piercing, her beauty was still noticeable, her complexion a soft clay brown. Her name tag read 'Lilly'.

"It's fine." She gave a closed lipped smile before she passed the bottle to the young woman. She asked. "Could you warm this up for me?"

"Yes, I can. It'll take a moment." Lilly smiled, her eyes sparkled with mirth. Her lips were coated with a bright red lipstick; her teeth were white and straight and from where she stood, they contrasted against the brightness of her lips. "Here you go."

"Thank you," she wanted to smile but her lips refused to. She walked back over to the sofa where she had left her stuff. Placing her son back in his carrier, she tested the formula on the skin of her inner wrist. Satisfied with the temperature, she placed the bottle down on the coffee table and picked her son up again. Adjusting his head to lie in the crook of her arm she picked up the bottle and began to feed him. With half-mast eyes, he stopped taking pulls from the bottle. Marcus brought a tiny hand up to rub his eyes. She rubbed his back and burped him; after he fell asleep she placed him in his carrier."You are such a guy once I give you what you want you roll over and go to sleep."

"Yeah, we do have the uncanny ability to fall asleep once we're satisfied." Her head shot up and her soft brown eyes met eyes so dark they took on a purple hue. His cheekbones were high and prominent on his face. His lips sported a grin showing a set of damn near perfect teeth. He raised an eyebrow and spoke in his delightfully low voice. "How old is he?"

"Um, he's nine months." She observed the broad stature of his body, wide shoulders, built to have legs thrown over them. A narrow waist that her legs could wrap around with little work and a tight bum that she had the strangest desire to smack. "Nine months and the bossiest thing you've ever met."

"He's gorgeous."He smiled at her, his eyes taking on a twinkle. "Like his mother."

He was suave, cool; too bad she'd been around that track enough times to last her a lifetime, and it wasn't something she was up to do again. She tried to make light conversation because if he kept looking at her like that the couch would be ruined.

"Are you using my son in a flirting tactic?" She smiled, and Lilly appeared from the corner of her eye and placed a bagel, tea, and bowl of applesauce on the table. She left before Julia could pay her.

"That depends." His voice brought her back to the situation at hand. Those dark eyes were observing her with intensity that made her mouth dry and her knees shake.

It was her turn to ask the question. "On what may I ask?"

"Is it working?"

~~~~

'Will Robin please come to register five?' The nasally voice broke through the grocery store's crappy choice in music. 'Will Robin please come to register five?'

Nikko's head throbbed and pulsated. Beside him, George walked, shooting him concerned glances as he sneezed and wheezed throughout the dairy section. George took the basket from Nikko's hand and pulled him towards the checkout.

George was loading the car when Nikko's phone started to rang. Ring...ring...ring...ring...Pick up bitch! Nikko rifled through his bag pulling out his phone "Hello?"

~~~

'Breathe in, breathe out, breath in, and breathe out.' However, Briana found it difficult to oblige the voice in the back of her head. She stared hard at her reflection trying to find a solution to her current predicament. She silently swore never to stray from her natural hair color again and to kill her stylist the next chance she got.

"Briana? Baby, where are you?" Adonis' deep bass echoed throughout the house with proud and exuberant confidence. Her got darn hair was pink, well not all of it, just where she wanted the highlights. Her chestnut hair, that she coveted for most of her life, was mud brown. She wanted to cry and have a conniption over the loss of her hair. She wanted to haul herself inside the bathroom for the rest of the day. A knock on the door interrupted her mental rant "Baby, are you alright?"

"No." She heard their bedroom door open and knew at that second it was Adonis. The soft creaking sound of their joint closet door being opened tickled her eardrums. Adonis knocked on the door asking his wife to let him in. "That would result in you laughing at me. Don't think so."

Adonis took a moment to stare at the door. He tried to cajole her out with comforting words. "Brie, baby I won't laugh I promise." By then he was sitting with his back against the bathroom door half-naked, his clothes sprawled out all over the bedroom floor. He had forgotten to throw the clothes into the laundry bin.

"Come on, it can't be all that bad." He tried again, throwing his watch on the nightstand next to him.

"Fine, but if you so much as laugh, I will end you with a cast iron skillet." He scrambled to his feet as the door opened and he bit his lip to avoid laughing at his irate wife. The soft brown hair he often ran his fingers through at night was mud brown with pink and blond highlights." You know I told you not to laugh."

"I love it when you talk dirty." She smiled into his chest. She pulled away from him after she kissed him. She walked over to her vanity and began to tame the wild mess that was her hair. She leaned back into her husband as his arms wrapped around her pulled her away from the vanity. Together they fell into the bed, she sighed into the kisses, Adonis planted on her neck. His lips found hers and with skilled hands, he tugged off her robe.

Briana knew she should have stopped, thinking about the dinner in the oven. However, once Adonis touched her she stopped thinking and just felt.

Protected: (adj) 1. Not dangerous, unlikely to cause or result in harm, injury, or damage. 2. Not in a position or situation that offers protection, so that harm, damage, loss, or unwanted tampering is unlikely. 3. Unharmed, uninjured, or undamaged condition.

Bea had been playing with the same sugar packet since Lucas walked in. She opened her mouth to greet him, and then shut down. Of course, like the insecure, self-doubting nark she was she denied everything Nikko said a week earlier until she was face-to-face with the man who stirred the feelings she kept buried inside.

His hands fell over hers, eyes met and he smiled at her. Of all the women Lucas had ever had, something with Bea was by far the most difficult. She had this way of pulling him in with little if any effort. He looked at her and a swarm of butterflies took off in his stomach. She laced fingers with him and tried to remember the speech she'd been practicing in the mirror.

"I'm sorry for not returning any of your phone calls. When you asked me to meet your family I, uh, panicked. Then there was the dresser drawer and closet space." She held her grip when she felt Lucas try to pull his hand away from hers. "I've never had someone fight for me like you have. You treat me like I'm special and I've never been special in anyone's eyes but Nikko and it scares me."

Lucas took the opportunity to lean over the table and kiss Bea. She tasted so good and he couldn't help himself. Since the moment he stepped foot into the quiet café and saw her sitting in the booth by the window he wanted to kiss her.

He wanted to make her see he wasn't giving up on her, not when they had a connection. Their lips fell into each other, a silent promise that he would make her believe in. Her lips tasted like the vanilla pralines she'd been eating when he walked in. He maneuvered himself around the table, his lips never leaving hers. How he'd managed to do that without falling flat on his face Bea wasn't sure. They pulled apart and Lucas caressed her bottom lip with his thumb.

"Why didn't you return my phone calls?" The question lingered between them. Bea could hear the hurt in his voice but she didn't answer because what could she say to him?

"Sweeten?"

She looked up at him and those grey eyes she'd spent days admiring and nights gazing into were so light that they were almost transparent. The sight was so beautiful yet so heart wrenching, she knew it was her fault. Just as fast as she'd seen it, it was gone, replaced by the stormy grey that held her captive. His voice pulled her in and under as he spoke in that husky tone she'd known all too well.

"Why won't you let me in?" His question made her pulse jump and her breath hitch, "I just want to be with you, that's all."

Then he kissed her; it wasn't like his other kisses, no this one was rough and aggressive as if he was branding her with his lips. Her ears were deaf to the world around them and her eyes closed with the intention of staying that way. His lips left hers and she mewled when his lips left hers. She refused to open her eyes; convinced that she was hallucinating and Lucas was still across the table looking at her with those piercing eyes.

Touch me.

Hold me.

Love me.

She wanted to tell him, hell she wanted to say something, but the words lodged themselves in her throat like a dirty secret. He pulled Bea out of her daze by standing up; he threw a bill down on the table and tugged Bea's hand.

The sound of camera shutters and the once subtle hum of voices elevated to an all out commotion. The camera flashes hurt her eyes; it took her a moment to collect herself and just breathe. Lucas pulled her closer, tried to shield her from the flashes with his body.

He helped her into a Ford Expedition and for a second Bea was confused. Lucas got into the driver’s side, put the key into the ignition, revved the engine, and took off down the street.

She heard the sizzle of bacon as well as the soft cooing of her precious baby. Julia groaned into her pillow as Nikko's falsetto voice broke into the morning haze. "Wake up, Garce!"

Then he kicked the side of the couch and she fell. Julia pushed herself up with her elbows, and rose only to find her feet tangled up in the comforter, her hair matted to the sides of her head. She gave one more kick willing herself free from the web of blankets beneath her feet.

"What the hell did you do to my good pillows?" She looked down only to realize she'd forgotten to wash off the makeup that covered her black eye. Nikko mumbled something in French and shoved some towels in her hands. She sauntered in the direction of the bathroom only to hear Nikko all but yell, "And stop switching, there isn't anyone here for you to impress!"

She ignored that last comment and slammed the bathroom door shut behind her. She turned on the water, pulled off her clothes, letting them accumulate in a puddle beneath her feet. She stepped inside and the water spiraled down. She washed her face trying to avoid touching the throbbing skin around her eye too much. After she finished, she toweled off and applied makeup around the blue skin.

She dressed, ignoring the bruises that glared at her from the mirror, trying not to dwell on them as she hurriedly put on lotion. When she emerged, Nikko had already been feeding her son, well trying. She tried to restrain her laughter but it bubbled up and escaped. He shoots a glare in her direction, tried giving him the bottle once more, but the bald menace refused. "Don't just stand there bust out a tit or something."

"Let me show you." She walked up to him taking the baby from his arms. "You have to rub the nipple across his lips a few times, then after a while he'll just latch on."

"Well you finish feeding the shit machine while I go dress." Nikko walked past her, "Before I forget, we'll have to talk about that black eye."

Shit, he wasn't supposed to notice. "What are you talking about?"

His eyes became green slits. "You really want to play dumb?"

She scrambled for an excuse."It's nothing I…I uh, fell."

"You fell huh, and I'm straight." He stared at her hard. "You're going to have to tell her. If you don't I will."

He was staring again. With gunmetal grey eyes and it was hard not to fidget beneath his gaze. She wanted nothing more but to kiss away his tenseness but thought better of it. Hell, she didn't know what she wanted to say and the silence was making it harder. He turned his back to her, faced the stove, and stirred whatever was in the cast iron pot in front of him. Lucas hadn't dropped her off at her apartment. She thought he would but instead he brought her to his apartment. Bea was sitting at the island and Lucas was cooking something. Whatever it was, it had a mouth-watering aroma.

"Who hurt you?" Lucas' voice was amazingly low, almost animal. She could see the tendons in his neck rise and strain under the tanned skin. She wanted to kiss and bite them--God he was hot when he was frustrated.

"Huh?" that ruined her fantasy.

"Who hurt you?" His voice had dropped and his eyes were a violent storm that grew harsher the longer she was silent.

"Why?" She should have cursed him and told him to go fuck himself but she didn't.

"Because whoever hurt you didn't deserve you in the first place." He made her feel good when he said that but there was that insecure nark again whispering to Bea feeding all her self-doubt.

Do you really think he means it?

How do you know he's being honest?

Why would he care about you?

"Stop. Can't we just enjoy each others’ company?"

"Stop what? I always enjoy our time together." He turned back around. Using dexterous hands, he chopped up some vegetables.

Bea scoffed at him and mentally cursed him. "Being so-" loving was what she wanted to say but she stopped herself. "The things you say are so…"

"Honest?" He was chopping onion and the smell wafting through the air to her nose. She ran a hand through her curls trying to find the right words. "What do you want?"

"No-" She wanted to grab his face and plant kisses on him, then smack him afterwards. She wanted to climb on the table and eat dinner off him, she wanted to go to the living room and make him read to her. She wanted to climb into bed with him and make him hold her like he did before. She wanted to call him her boyfriend and not have people ask with their eyes 'how the hell it happened'. Most of all she wanted to believe everything he said to her.

"Baby, what do you want?" He walked over to her. He trapped her in between the island and him. He wanted to kiss away the lost look in her eyes; hold her until she felt safe and make her believe in herself. Just make her believe in something other than pain."Just say what you want."

"Stop saying things you don't mean!" Bea began to push at the solid wall of his chest, she frowned when he wouldn't budge.

"I mean everything I say. If I didn't, why say it? You know I don't mind you being nervous around me, sure. However, for you to have doubt about what I see when I look at you well that bothers me. Yes, I've gone out with models and movie starlets, but they can't hold a candle to you.

You have a light that I can't explain. I could have the shittiest day and all it takes is your voice or the thought of you to make my day go from bad to marvelous. You only have to walk into a room and everyone goes from tense to comfortable just like that. You never let people get the best of you and I admire that. I wish you could see what I see whenever I look at you.

You're so fucking beautiful to me. But, you make it so hard. It's as if you're keep hiding from me. Please tell me what I have to do--I just want to be with you." His arm wrapped around her and he praised her face with his lips. Her hands found his back and her nails dug into the firm skin just above his firm derrière.

"Lucas," her eyes were hazy and words slurred. His lips were so addicting; making her feel so loved, so alive, so special, and so beautiful. Then all she needed was to feel him so close that he was under her skin. So close that their hearts fell into sync.

"Say it." His voice was husky and made her nipples harden and jut out as if they were reaching for him through the cotton cups.

"I-" Her mouth was dry. Then her heart speed up. His hands pushed hair out of her face. "I don't-"

"Say you want to be with me too."

"Lucas?" Her voice was just above a whisper. "Could you just hold me?" and never let go.

His eyes softened. He kissed her forehead and wrapped long limber arms around her, pulling her close to his chest. Her vanilla and lilac scent permeated his clothes. Her hand reached forward needy. She needed to be close, so close he could feel her move under his skin. So close, he wouldn't know where he started and she ended.

"You ready to give us a chance?" He spoke into her hair and held her closer.

"Yeah."

Secret: (adj) 1. Not widely known. 2. Unadmitted. 3. Mysterious and beyond common knowledge. 4. Something private and secluded. 5. Without anyone else's knowledge.

"I wanted to be a ballerina." Lucas looked up at her, his head in her lap. Her fingers nestled in his onyx tresses. Lucas brought them back to his apartment still quiet and distant. It was the first time they'd said anything in what felt like hours. "I begged and begged for lessons but..."

"But you didn't get them?"

"No, I got them and a nice slice of reality. It just wasn't what I was hoping for." She scrambled for the perfect words to describe what she felt.

Envious, that's how she felt whenever she saw little girls in their tutus. She'd begged and pleaded with her parents as a child for lessons.

"My grandmother made me a red tutu. She said, baby, pink is much too common but red they'd remember you no matter what you did. They'd always remember the girl in the red tutu."

She would practice and practice. Endure all of her sisters' fat jokes until her toes bled. She ignored the pointed whispers of her classmates and even her teacher's discouragements. She ignored it all, excelled despite all their contradictions.

He laced fingers with her, voice muted as he spoke. "Don't stop talking."

"She was right about the tutu." Her teacher had seen the overweight girl covered in cotton, latex, and sheer and dubbed her cherry. Her classmates had not been that kind--they'd filled her locker with putrid tomatoes and taken to calling her tomato when the teacher wasn't around and ‘Mato' when she was. "She was right about a lot of things."

"I practiced and practiced until I thought I'd faint from exhaustion. My teacher had even given me one of the leading parts. I was cast as Noosa the troll princess. Till this day I still think it was to spite me but I took my part very seriously."

Lucas kissed the back of her hand but Bea just droned on, her voice flat and her eyes staring straight in front of her. She bit her bottom lip. Her breathe hitched, "I-I wrote the date down in every planner and calendar I could get my hands on. I reminded them for weeks beforehand."

It was her first recital and she reserved front row seats for her whole family. She was so proud of herself and just wanted to show her parents how good she really was. Then the curtains opened and she danced her heart out. When she finally swallowed her nerves and looked down into the crowd hoping to find her sisters slack jawed, her mother proud of her for once, and her father actually looking at her and seeing her as a person. Instead, she was met by reality; her row was empty. All the reminding she'd done, all her practicing, was all for nothing.

"But it just wasn't important enough." She laughed but it sounded more like a sob. "My grandmother sent Nikko down to the school to record her 'swan princess'. She made a dinner in my honor." She bit her bottom lip and stuttered as if she was subconsciously reliving the ordeal. He rubbed her hand, willing her back to him. He sat up and kissed her. His hands holding her face as he randomly planted butterfly kisses on her face until he touched her lips, kissing her with so much passion it overwhelmed her.

When Lucas kissed Bea he wanted it to be different, even though their mouths were open he didn't go that far. He kissed her with every intention of kissing away the pain. He didn't like the lost look on her face or the blankness of her eyes.

~~~

No, he wasn't supposed to look at another woman like that, only her. As she stared down at the photos, she felt irate. She wanted to yell and scream, break shit, but a proper lady always walks away. She knows her limits and is A-Okay with them. She was A-O-fucking-kay with it.

However, as she stared at the photos she knew what had to be done. How dare he? She threw the pictures along with the day's paper off her oak desk, too angry to remember her well-bred upbringing. She spoke loudly her accent ringing with question. "How dare he desire that fat nothing over me?"

She walked over to the cabinet filling her glass with whiskey. Mozart blared in the background as she downed the glass' contents, shuddering as it scorched its way down her throat, warming her chest. With an angry flick, she tossed the glass; it exploded against the wall with shards glinting upon the wood floors. Lucas was hers and there was no way she was going to let that bint keep him.

~~~
Bea was important too Lucas. She made him happy, so very happy. He wasn't quite sure what it was about her that made her do important. She'd made her way under his skin, wedged herself inside of his chest cavity, and dug her heels into the surrounding tissues refusing to let go.

It had to be the lost look in her eyes that made him want to stop the pain. That look made him feel hopeless, so vulnerable. It made him feel like the little boy waiting for his mother to come home. She never did. The boy waiting in the police station for a grandmother he'd never known. He hated that feeling. Most of all he hated the watching her reopen old scars, relive that pain

She didn't have to hurt. Not if he could change that. He did the only thing he knew how to do, the only thing his mother had ever bothered to teach him.

Sex is a great bargaining chip.

~~~
"Where's Bea?" Julia flopped down onto the lazy boy located in the far right corner facing a window. The blinds were open letting the bustling lights of the street below pour into the room and throw shadows. Marcus cooed from his carrier tiny fist up and waving about his cherubic face.

She moved from her seat to take him up in her arms. "This is your aunties place you like it?"

He cooed and smiled that toothless smile.
~~~

"L-l-l-Lucas."She tugged at his hair, attempted to arch away from his skilled tongue only to find his hands gripping her hips holding her in place. His beard stubble rasped against her inner thighs. Her hips bucked as he lapped at her bundle of nerves bringing it between his lips. "Lucas?"

He was calm, stoic, and utterly detached while she was hot and breathless. It felt different like she wasn't with Lucas. Like there was a complete and total stranger between her legs. She didn't like it, not one bit. It was as if he was on autopilot. He wasn't gentle, passionate, or even there with her. She called his name tried to find him."Lucas?"

"Baby?" She tugged at his hair, arching her body away from his mouth and hands. Grey eyes looked up at her, glazed and so distant they spoke in volumes. With an unsure hand, she reached her fingers gracing the crown of his head; unsure of how he'd react to her touch. "Where were you?"

He rose to his knees, her eyes following the beautiful tanned expanse of his shoulders. Her skirt was bunched up around her waist, panties somewhere and her blouse was missing some buttons. Lucas moved until his head was resting on her stomach; his chest cushioned by the breadth of her hips and thighs.

"I...I'm right here...with you. Right here with you." He leaned up and brushed his lips against her cold fingertips and palm. Luminous grey orbs bore into chocolate melting and searing. He wanted to lie there so bad as long as it meant being next to her. However, he knew he shouldn't not when they weren't very sure about where they stood. He wanted to make her talk but he didn't want to coerce it out of her he wanted her to talk to him. Lucas wasn't sure what happened when she ran from his apartment. From him.

Courage is the ability to face danger, difficulty, or uncertainty; without being overcome by fear or being deflected from a chosen course of action.

She smiled as she mentally replayed their night together. He kissed her face and shared some stories of his childhood. She took it as his way of reciprocating. The stories he'd told her about his upbringing. How old he was when he'd gone to live with his grandparents. How it felt when he lost his tonsils. Then he read to her in that dark and steady timbre until she fell asleep.