Author's Chapter Notes:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
If I was your girl...
Oh the things I'll do to you
I'd make you call out my name
I'd ask who it belongs to
If I was your woman,
The things I'd do to you
But I'm not, so I can't,
Then I won't
But, if I was your girl
*
1999
The last day of 1998 should have been memorable but Aiyana couldn't remember a thing that happened the night before but when she woke up in a hotel room that seemed to be filled with naked bodies, she could guess how it ended. She looked down at herself and she was naked too. "Shit"she said to herself, she had to get out of here. Luckily she found her dress from the night before but couldn't find her heels. She took another pair because she didn't want to risk waking someone up. No awkward moments, this was awkward enough. She went to the bathroom and walked in on Cherry and Fred Durst fucking on the sink.
"Wait! We aren't done!"Cherry said between every beat that Fred gave her
Aiyana just replied with wide eyes and closed the door. She had to get out of here. But she didn't want to leave Cherry.... She decided to wait in the lobby. When she saw that the hotel was giving a free continental breakfast, her stomach instantly growled. She piled her plate high and ate, ignoring the fact that some people were staring at her. They knew just by looking at her that she got into some crazy shit last night...but what?
"There you are!"Cherry said as she plopped down next to her. "You left so fast that Fred didn't have time to ask you if you wanted to join"
"Join? Uh no thanks"Aiyana said. Fred Durst? Definitely not her type.
"Oh I forgot, hot models are your type. Your such a snob"Cherry said as she ate one of Aiyana's muffins. "Last night was crazy wasn't it?"
"I guess. I could only tell because I woke up in a room with 6 other naked people"Aiyana groaned
"You were in that orgy!? Was Marilyn Manson in that one?"
"Ew! Hell no!"Aiyana said in shock as she mentally tried to remember if she saw anyone that looked like him in the room
"Oh must have been the next room, there were so many of those going on I don't know why I wasn't in any of them. So who was with you? Oh yeah you don't remember.."Cherry said. "I'm so glad you had fun though. See? And you were all nervous hanging out with the MTV crowd when they obviously liked you"
"I don't remember a fucking thing"Aiyana said. "I remember Limp Bizkit performing.....then the ball dropped.....we did shots with Courtney Love.....then we went to that hotel room......then I wake up...."
"Courtney is fucking awesome! I don't know why people call her a bitch"Cherry said. "So you forgot that you were the reason why we were even invited up to that room huh?"
"Huh?"
"One of Christina Aguilera's back up dancers really liked you and since Fred was all up Christina's ass, he invited all of us up"
"Wait....he likes Christina...but he was with you?"
"Oh cuz she turned him down. I didn't. She's cool but she is a goody two shoes"Cherry said. "Ohmygod. Look at us! We are having a conversation about being at a party with Courtney Love and Christina Aguilera. Can you believe it?"
"No...can we go home?"
"Yeah....you ok? Did something happen?"Cherry asked, her mood immediately changing
"No...at least....I don't think so....I don't remember"
A few weeks later, Cherry and her band received a call from Limp Bizkit's management team. They wanted them to open up for Limp Bizkit during the first week of their new tour. Cherry was ecstatic and Aiyana was happy for her but she was also scared. She had a lot of big photo 'shoots and gigs coming up and she needed her to be there.
However, Cherry was having the time of her life and she was in love with Fred. The Psychotic Scrumpies played to bigger crowds in bigger arenas in bigger cities. Aiyana hoped she was being careful since she saw several interviews about him talking about having sex with Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears. Was he a liar or did he get around?
The same day that Cherry was in Miami was when Aiyana touched down in London for a fashion show. She was used to the planes and traveling overseas. She walked more runways overseas than in the US. It was there that she met Kate Moss, Antonio Sabato Jr., Cindy Crawford and the Spice Girls. She and Antonio hit it off great and she ended up staying an extra couple of days in London because she didn't have the strength to get out of bed....or stop sniffing coke.
She ended up leaving when she received a frenzied phone call from Cherry. "Whats wrong?"Aiyana asked, she started to freak out because she was so high and because she has never heard Cherry so upset.
"Fred is an asshole! I never want to see him again! He ruined everything! When are you coming back home?"she cried. Fred was sleeping around, not with the women he was talking about on TV, but with groupies. She broke up with him and in turn, Limp Bizkit's management didn't renew the Psychotic Scrumpies as an opening act for the rest of the tour and signed a punk band called Papa Roach instead. The rest of the band was furious that she got involved with Fred and the fact that it ruined their tour. They weren't speaking to her. "Please come home?"she pleaded
"I'll get on the first plane"Aiyana promised. She kissed Antonio goodbye, not knowing it would be the last time she would see him, and flew home...
*
2009
Weeks past and Christopher was proud that he was able to compose himself around Aiyana. He decided to back off. He obviously made her uncomfortable and if she wasn't secure enough to say so, he would take matters into his own hands. If she didn't like it, she could always say so. But she never did. This made Carlos happy and there wasn't as much tension between the two of them anymore. He was still cordial and he would always peek his head in and say hi to both her and Alexie but that was the extent of their conversation. He just wished that she would walk into the mail room, lock the door behind her and make love to him on his desk apologizing for acting so weird and begging him to forgive her, which she didn't have to, he could never be mad at her. But that was a dream. A dream that he woke up with huge morning wood about. It was never going to happen. He did meet a girl at the bar and he brought her back to his place a couple of times but the relationship soon fizzled when he called her up and she explained that she was going back to her crazy ex boyfriend that she used to bore him about. Good riddance. Maybe he just needed to stay single...
Aiyana noticed Christopher backing off. She didn't like it but she had no clue on how to express it. She still didn't know what everything meant. It was just a crush or hormones probably. She soon was back to normal and she wasn't weak in the knees when he would peek his head in the door and say hey. But she always longed for him to stay around. Nicholas gave her shit about selling the house but she just ignored him. The house finally sold and Aiyana made plans on moving out. She visited her apartment at least twice a week to move things in early, hoping to run into Christopher, but never did. Bad thing about it was, planning to move during their busiest time of year was stressful and she kicked herself. What was she thinking? She was very stressed out and glasses of wine were the only way for her to stay calm. The big day finally came and she, Dee Dee and Rob spent a weekend helping her move the last items into the apartment. When they were done, they popped open a glass of champagne as they sat on the new leather couch that Aiyana bought. She sold most of the furniture in the house because she was too keen on really starting anew. How could she if she brought that love seat that she and Nicholas tried to make a baby on? After Dee Dee and Rob left, the excitement died down quickly. She just realized that she has never lived alone before. Most of her years were spent with roommates or Nicholas....but mostly Cherry. Damn. Cherry. Everyday she wondered where she was. What she was doing and if she was ok. Sometimes she was scared that she might accidentally run into a mutual friend of theirs and be told that her best friend had died. They went through so much together. Too much. Which was the reason why she wasn't here anymore as her backbone...
"Whoa....ok.....time for a distraction"Aiyana said to herself as she blinked her eyes quickly so the tears she felt trying to well up would subside. She poured herself another glass and then went to the fridge and realized that there was nothing there. "And the grocery store it is then"she said to herself with a laugh. She finished the glass and then got her purse and keys. Luckily the grocery store was only 2 doors down. She loved how everything she needed was walking distance.
*
Christopher sighed heavily as he changed his shirt again. "Seriously? Maybe this wasn't such a good idea"
"No trust me, wear that green shirt you got there"his friend named Mikaila said to him as she pointed to his closet. "Her favorite color is green"
Christopher put the shirt on. "Now am I ok?"he asked her. He wasn't a girl. Girls usually tried on every outfit in their closet and then ended up usually just settling on the first thing they tried on anyway. Guys throw something on and go. That simple. Mikaila made him try on different outfits because supposedly his date was a neat freak who loved guys who wore green.
"Yeah your perfect"
"I should kill you. I don't do blind dates"he said to her
"Its not like you were doing anything. You aren't seeing that whore you met at that bar anymore and she just got out of a relationship with her crazy ex-"
"Nope. No crazy ex's for me. That's how the last one got away because she went back to him. Why do chicks stay with the crazy guys? Then they get married and reproduce. That's why there are so many crazies running around"
"You done?"Mikaila asked with a smirk. "You can't back out. You promised"
"I don't think I did-"
"Besides we are all going to see the movie together and I don't want her to be a third wheel"
"But-"
"And your so sweet, Christopher. She's lucky that you are single. You guys are going to be so cute. Just you wait"she said excitedly
"Fine...but only because I really wanna see this Avatar flick"he grumbled
"Wow. Ok please don't use that as a pick up line"she said with a laugh. "Lets go. We are gonna meet her at Chinatown"she said as they walked to the door
"Hey can I stop by the store really quick?"he said to her. "Wanna pick up something"he said. He walked to the grocery store and walked in and went to the Florist section. He got a single rose and some chocolates. He was a romantic and if he was a girl, he would totally go for him. He walked to the cashier and was almost run over by a full shopping cart. "Oh!"he said as he jumped back. The person's cart was piled so high that he couldn't see who was pushing it
"Sorry" a familiar voice said and sure enough... a head peeked around the box of Charmin toilet paper and it was Aiyana. "Oh...hey Christopher"she said. "How are you?"
"Good. You?"he asked her
"Very good. Tonight is my first night in my new place"she said. 'Which is right next door to you....wanna see?', she thought
"Really? Congratulations. You should have told me, I would have helped you out"he said
"Oh its fine. I had some friends help me out"she said and noticed the single rose and candy. "Hot date?"she asked, trying not to sound too disappointed. She couldn't be surprised. She was too young for him but he was still fine as hell. Any girl his age would be stupid to pass him up.
"Ugh....yeah"he said. He wanted to explain to her that the chick was probably going to be a mud duck (meaning ugly) and he hated that his friend set him up on a blind date and he would rather help her move furniture then be with this chick. But he didn't wanna scare her so he just stood there awkwardly. "Ugh, you got enough there though? You need help getting that back up to your place?"
"I'll be fine"Aiyana said as she shook her head. "Can't be late for your date"she said,"I'll see you around. Have a good time k?"
"Thanks, you too"he said as he watched her push her cart to a cashier and started unloading her items on the conveyor belt. He wanted to help her. Go back to her place, make a nice home cooked meal and watch a movie. Maybe get a tour and she will show him her bedroom....yeah right. He walked to the 15 items or less aisle and checked out. He walked to the door and turned around and caught Aiyana's eye. She smiled and then continued to put her many bags back in the cart. It took everything in him to walk out of those automatic doors...
*
They arrived at Chinatown and Christopher was nervous. He hoped she wasn't a mud duck. He wasn't ready for an awkward blind date. They walked into Bar Louie and he followed them to the bar. Then he saw Mikaila walk up to a girl and give her a hug. He then laughed when he saw who it was. "Alexie?"he asked her
"Your my date!?"she asked and laughed. "Ohmygod. This city is too fucking small"she said as she shook her head
"You two know each other?"Mikaila asked in shock
"He temps where I work"Alexie said
"I thought you worked in a mail room"Mikaila asked him
"Yes, more specifically at Metro Fashion Magazine"he said
"Ohmygod! Well this is perfect then. No awkwardness"Mikaila said, feeling very proud of herself
"Too late"Alexie said. Christopher laughed. "Are those for me?"she asked as she saw him holding a rose and chocolates
"Oh yeah"he said and laughed and gave them to her.
"Thanks. I didn't know you were one of those old fashioned romantics"Alexie said to him. He shrugged. "You got me my favorite chocolates though"she said as she opened the box and ate some. "Oh God, how did you know I have been craving these all day?"
"I'm good like that"he said with a smile. "Those chocolate cravings come with the whole pregnancy thing huh?"he asked her
Mikaila gasped. "YOUR PREGNANT!?"she asked in shock, a shock so loud that the whole bar heard
Alexie turned red and looked at Christopher as if she wanted to strangle him. So much for not being awkward....
*
"Again I'm really sorry. I thought she knew"Christopher said as he and Alexie walked out of the movie theater.
"Its fine. You didn't know that I'm a pathological liar. I didn't tell anyone. My mom doesn't even know. The only people who know are Aiyana and Grant"she said. "Grant probably told. You know how the gays are, they cant keep their mouth shut"she said.
Christopher didn't say anything. Aiyana told him by accident and he wasn't going to snitch on her. "Your mom doesn't know?"
"She hates my ex. I hate him too and we tried to work it out but....some people are meant to be together and some people are meant to kill each other"she said. "I didn't say anything because it was a blind date too....those never go anywhere and I needed a laugh tonight"
"A laugh? I was nearly gonna shit myself because I was so nervous. I was so afraid that you would be a mud duck that smelled like onions"
Alexie laughed out loud. "I thought you were going to be one of those computer geeks who carries around a key chain full of flash drives and jerks off to the Sci Fi Channel"she said. Christopher laughed out loud. He learned quickly that Alexie had one of those vulgar sense of humors but he liked it. It made the whole awkwardness easier to deal with. "I was also afraid that you were going to be one of those meat heads who stay in the gym and the tanning bed all day"
"Well we should get you home. You need your rest obviously"Mikaila said as she and her boyfriend walked past them to the escalator.
"Wow, she's still pissed"Alexie said but they just laughed
*
On Monday morning, Aiyana woke up feeling oddly refreshed. The new Sleep Number mattress she bought did wonders on her back and she slept like a baby because of it...and the champagne. Seeing Christopher buying roses and chocolates for his date made her very depressed and she actually hoped that his date was ugly or decided to break it off with him or something. Which was kinda mean but...she couldn't help how she felt....which was even worse.
However, she was met with quite a surprise when she walked into the office and saw Christopher sitting on Alexie's desk and they were laughing about something. "That movie was great, what are you talking about?"
"I'm not saying it wasn't great but some things weirded me out about it. I mean having sex with your ponytails attached!? What kind of shit was James Cameron smoking?"she said as Christopher laughed out loud
"Come on, you were turned on. I could feel you squirming in your seat next to me"he said
"Good morning"Aiyana said as she walked in. "What can be so funny on a Monday morning?"she asked with a smile
Christopher got up from where he was sitting and his eyes instantly lit up when he saw her. "Morning Aiyana. How was your weekend?"
"Good, moved into my apartment"she said. "Seems like you two had a funny weekend or at least one of you did"
"No we both did. My friend set me up on a blind date with Christopher. It was funny. This city is too fucking small. I knew I should have moved to Baltimore"Alexie said
"And I had no idea it was her either. Mikaila played you up saying you were an extreme neat freak and that your favorite color is green"Christopher said
"Yeah that's true. My desk doesn't show it but you should see my apartment. Neat as a display in Ikea"she said
"Wow small world"Aiyana said. "What did you do?"
"We saw Avatar. It was ok"Alexie said in a monotone voice
"I loved it"Christopher said
"Oh I really wanna see that"Aiyana said. But she knew from the previews that it was kind of a supernatural Titanic type of film. A movie where you would take a date...which she didn't have.
"You should totally see it. Don't listen to her"Christopher said. Aiyana nodded and decided to walk into her office and put her things down and get ready for the day. She heard Alexie say something and Christopher laughed out loud. "Ok lemme get out of this damn office before I get in trouble. You are crazy Lex. You need to be checked in somewhere"he said to her with a big smile. "See you around Aiyana"he said and left
"Bye"Aiyana said but he was already gone. She heard Alexie laugh to herself. Did they like each other? It sounded like they had a great time. Did they already have plans to do it again? Were they an item? Were they sleeping together already? They seemed so comfortable with each other and it seemed to happen overnight. What the hell? Why did things always end up this way? Weird. She had a crush on her assistant's boyfriend. She had dreams about sleeping with him and he lived next door to her. And she was pregnant. She needed a boyfriend more than her probably and they were around the same age. They got along. He was cute. She was cute. Why not? Alexie would be stupid to let him go now that she went out on a date with him. She then gasped. He gave her flowers and chocolates. She probably swooned. She would if she were her. She loved old fashioned romantics because she never had many encounters with any. He probably won her over in an instant. Oh God, this had to stop. She couldn't feel this way about him but it was hard. It was going to be so hard avoiding him now that she lived next door to him and the fact that he was dating her assistant who had an office next door to her. How the fuck did she get in the middle of this? And the worse thing was that she was the only one freaking out. Christopher didn't know. He backed off a long time ago so he wasn't interested. He probably never was. Alexie had nothing to worry about. She knew that because she didn't know what she was thinking now. No one knew except her. She let him back off and he somehow landed in the arms of her assistant because God thinks he has a great sense of humor. Fuck. Why didn't she say something to him as soon as she had those dreams? Or when he reached out to her and asked what was troubling her. That was the perfect moment. But now the perfect moment was gone...
She sighed as she sat back in her seat and looked at the clock. She wanted to cry. 9:09 am. She has only been at work for 9 minutes and it felt like her heart was breaking and her head was spinning because she was so confused...
*
Christopher walked to the elevator and whistled to himself. It was a few minutes after 5. He had no plans tonight and he intended on keeping them that way. He would rather play Street Fighter, drink beer and scratch his balls...you know....guy stuff. The doors closed and then they opened and Aiyana walked in. She smiled and stood facing the doors next to him. They waited for them to close and then the elevator started to go down slowly. They stood there in silence and he immediately felt the tension that has been building for weeks since he had to force himself to "back off". Why did he have to fuck everything up? Why did he get into a drunken stupor and say things that made her uncomfortable. She wasn't Lexie. Lexie probably would have laughed in his face and said something vulgar. Aiyana was different.
He was so lost in his thoughts that he jumped out of his skin when the elevator came to an abrupt start. He snapped out of his daze and saw that Aiyana pressed the emergency stop button. "What are you doing?"he asked her
She dropped her small briefcase and her purse to the ground. She walked up to him and pulled him toward her and kissed him softly on the mouth. For a few seconds he couldn't move. He was so in shock and he was trying to figure out if he was dreaming. He then gave in and pulled her closer to him and kissed her with a little more passion. She soon matched it and slid her tongue in his mouth. He moaned. OH MY GOD!, was all he could think of as her tongue traced his bottom lip and then slipped back into his mouth and massaged his tongue. His hands cupped her face as her arms wrapped around his waist. He then kissed her chin, her cheek and then he started to kiss her neck. He licked small little circles and she finally let out a moan. That made him even more turned on. Her moans were the sexiest thing he has ever heard. He kissed and licked her neck more passionately and he felt her hands travel down to his belt. They were going to do it? Right here!? Awesome!
Then a voice on the intercom interrupted them. "Is anyone in there? Are you all alright?"
They both jumped away from each other. "Is anyone there? Are you alright?"the voice repeated
Aiyana stood there in shock and he pressed the intercom button. "Um yeah. We are fine. I don't know what happened there"he said, which was the whole truth and nothing but
"Ok before we call the Fire Department we are going to troubleshoot ok?"the person said
Christopher looked at Aiyana and she knelt on the floor and picked up her briefcase and purse and fixed her blouse. Yeah the moment was over. He pressed the stop button and the elevator turned back on. "Oh what do you know! It works now! Thanks!"he said. He then turned to look at Aiyana again.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. We could have gotten in trouble"
"Well we didn't. We are fine-"
"I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. Ive been stressed with work and my divorce and selling the house and the move....I don't know what came over me. I don't usually do this....don't tell Alexie ok? You two have something going and I don't want some weird dramatic office triangle. You two are cute together. She's more your age anyway. Just forget this even happened. I'm gonna go straight home and take a bath um...and try not to embarrass myself anymore. Just forget this happened. I'm just an old crazy person who jumps on little 20 somethings-"
The doors opened to the lobby and it interrupted her rambling. She was ready to run out of the elevator but then he grabbed her arm. She stopped short and turned to him.....
*
Sittin' over here
Starin' in your face
With lust in my eyes
Sure don't give a damn and
Ya don't know
That I've been dreamin' of ya in my fantasy
Never once you looked at me,
Don't even realize that I'm wantin' you
To fulfill my needs
Think what you want
Let your mind free
Run free to a place that no one dares to
*
Chapter End Notes:
Lyrics Featured: "If" by Janet Jackson