Introduction

People say that you’ll love only once in your life but that’s not true. Soul mates do not exist, true love doesn’t exist, I’m not even sure that love exists anymore. All I know is that love has hurt me. It has slapped me in my face, push me down a flight of stairs and worst of all, love has broken my heart. My love, the love that has torn my beating heart from my body, name was Kevin. Kevin Masters was a man that every girl could appreciate. He was an intellectual. He was gorgeous. Finally, He was the head associate at Brown and Johnson. The man was paid.

Kevin was a manipulative man, a sexy man, a conniving man. He was my man. That is, until he started to think that he out grew. Can you believe that? He actually told me that he out grew me and was moving on to next year’s model like I was a damn car that could be traded in on a whim. I’ll admit that I’m not a classic beauty but I am a beautiful woman none the less. Like Maya Angelou said, “Men themselves have wondered what they see in me. They try so much but they can't touch my inner mystery. When I try to show them they say they still can't see. I say, it’s in the arch of my back, 
the sun of my smile, the ride of my breasts, the grace of my style. I'm a woman phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman, that’s me.”

I’m not the type of woman to let a man make me doubt me. I’m a woman of beauty, power, strength and intellectual ability. My brain has given me the ability to see through most men’s bullshit but not Kevin’s until it was too late. I was pulled into his web of lust and lies and still I wonder why to this day. Perhaps it was because of “never”. You know the word that people tell you to “never” say. Well, I used it a lot. I used that word when I witnessed my father beating my mother. I said that I would never marry a man like that. I used it when my friends cried in despair because of their cheating husbands. I said that I would never marry a man like that. I even used that word when I saw man mentally abuse his wife. I said I would never marry a man like that but here I am. I’m lying in a puddle of my own blood on my bedroom floor because my cheating and mentally abusive husband decided that he was done with me. How far have I fallen?

Chapter One 

Dr. Grayson stood over his newest patient that was almost certainly the victim of domestic violence. He was used to seeing cases like these but the pain that this woman suffered pulled at his heartstrings for personal reasons. Tonya Winters was his first love from high school. He always imagined what they meeting would be like. Their 10 year high school reunion was coming up in a few months and Grayson was sure that she would look stunning. Instead of seeing her beautiful smile, he saw a swollen lip. Her body held numerous bruises, some from several days ago. Her right arm and collarbone was broken and her ribs were fractured. Her nose was also broken and bled profusely when she first arrived to Maryland Memorial. But what really broke Dr. Grayson’s heart was the fact that this young woman missed carried due to the abuse she suffered at the hands of her husband. He couldn’t understand how a man could put his hands on a woman. Whoever did it nearly killed her.

“Doctor, Mrs. Masters’ family has arrived and they would like to speak to you immediately.” Nurse Shultz, an older woman, said quickly before leaving the room in a hurry to see to another patient. 

Grayson sighed before leaving to see Tonya’s family. The last time he saw them was the day that he and Tonya broke up. College was on the horizon and they didn’t want to hold the other back from experiencing all that college had to offer. So, he went off to Harvard and she stayed in Baltimore to attend University of Baltimore. He regretted that decision every day since then. He hadn’t met anyone that left a mark on him quite like Tonya. She was one of a kind. 

“Mr. and Mrs. Winters’,” Grayson called out to the impatiently in the waiting room. They looked tired, bags were hanging from their eyes and dark circles were forming under them. Next to them was their daughter Sophia. She was only in middle school when Tonya and he graduated from high school. He remembered fondly how she used to follow behind him and Tonya. She grew into a beautiful young woman and looked very similar to her sister. Both were them were 5’6” and looked comparable to their mother.

“Kyle!” Sophia called out when she saw him. The tears flowing down her eyes stopped briefly when she saw him and older black couple that was standing 

a smile came across her face. She ran over to him with her arms open wide and hugged him tightly. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re here. I’m glad that you’re the one looking over my sister. I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.” He heard her sniffle before releasing him. “How is she?”

“Yes, how is my daughter?” Mr. Reid asked. He and Grayson was roughly the same height 6’1”. He was a rather large man, unhealthily so. His figure was almost as intimidating as his incredibly deep, thunderous voice but Grayson learned to fear the man long ago. He remembered how Tonya told him that her daddy’s eyes reminded her of Werthers Originals. They were hard to break but sweet to the core.

“She’s in recovery, Mr. Winters. She currently unconscious but we’re sure that she’ll wake up soon. Her right arm has been broken as well as her collarbone. There’s bruising all over her body, including her neck. We think she was strangled—”

“My poor baby!” Mrs. Winters cried out at the news. Grayson watched as her petite frame held onto Mr. Winters more closely. She was a little over 5’2” and very slim, just the opposite of her husband. She was very beautiful; her daughters took after her in that regard. He felt a pang in his heart at the sound of her tears. Mrs. Winters was like a second mother to him. He spent more time at her home during his teen years than his own. He came accustomed to her cooking and knew that no one, including his own mother, could cook better than Mrs. Winters. 

“Her ribs were fractured and she miss carried her baby.”

“Oh no,” Sophia whispered as the news sunk in. “Tonya was pregnant? How could he—that fucking son of a bitch!”

“I’ll kill him. I’ll kill him,” Mr. Winters kept repeating to himself while his wife tried to console him and her daughter and to get them quiet down. Grayson didn’t dare speak. He thought it was best to give them time to release some of their rage. When he realized who he was attending he was angry too. “We’ll she be okay?” Mr. Winters asked after a minute.

“Yes, there was no irreversible damage done besides the miscarriage. We expect her to recover fully within the next few months and she should awaken soon but in the meantime…” Grayson waved over the two officers that just walked into the waiting room, “these officers have a few questions for you. I suggest you file a report so they can get the animal that did this to her off the street.”

“Thank you, Kyle. I always said that Tonya should have married you instead of Kevin. You were like the son I never had.” Mrs. Winter said before kissing him on the cheek and turning her attention to the cops. Mr. Winters patted him on the shoulders to give his thanks and Sophia followed her mother’s actions by kissing him on the cheek as well before leaving.

“Did you know them?” A male voice came from behind him that was shortly followed by a pat on his shoulder. He looked behind him and saw his best friend Brandon Li standing behind him. He too was tall, much taller than Grayson. He was about 6’6” and a mix with Black and Korean on his father’s side.

“Yea, those people right there could have been my in-laws. Their daughter, my ex, was nearly beaten to death tonight by her husband. Luckily her neighbor heard the commotion and called 911. Otherwise, I don’t even know what would’ve happened.” 

“Damn, man. I’m sorry to hear that. How’s she doing?”

“She’s unconscious now but when she gets up, she’s gonna be in a lot of pain but I’m sure she’ll pull through. Tonya was always a tough girl.”

Brandon could see the pain in his friend’s eyes. This Tonya woman must have definitely meant a lot to him, more than any of the girls that he’s seen him date. He briefly wondered if she was the reason why is relationships never lasted longer than 3 months.

“How’re you holding up?”

“Fine,” Grayson looked down at his watch and noticed the time. It was half past 1. He was supposed to be off 3 hours ago and better yet, so was Brandon, “Isn’t it time for you to be going home? Your shift ended 3 hours ago.”

“Being an Obstetrician doesn’t really allow me to have set hours, one of my patients just delivered a healthy baby boy. All thanks to me,” Brandon bragged, partly out of jest. He needed to lighten the mood in the room. He wasn’t use to all of the melancholy. Even though he worked in the hospital, his department usually delivered happy news. Babies usually made people happy.

Grayson chuckled at Brandon’s boasting. “I’m sure her husband had something to do with it.”

“Hey!” Brandon cried out as if offended, “He was there for what? 2 minutes, 3 at the most. I was there for nine months. I have every right to take all the credit.”

“If it helps you sleep at night, bro,” Grayson said with a roll of his eyes before leaving the waiting room to check on a few patients but he knew that there wouldn’t be much to do since just about everyone should be sleeping. He just needed to keep himself busy and his mind off of Tonya. “Are you leaving soon?”
“Yea, I am beat. What about you?”

“I think I’m needed here.”Grayson said as he picked up one of his patient’s charts. 

Brad looked at his friend then at the empty corridor and dark rooms. Who could he possibly help at this time of night? The man pulled a double shift and now he was pushing for triple? He had to be insane. “I think you should get yourself some rest. You have to work tomorrow and you won’t be a help to anyone if you can barely keep your eyes open.”

“Yea, but I’m not lookin’ forward to the ride home.”

“Then you can crash at my place. I’m only a few blocks away, c’mon.”

“Sure,” Grayson agreed. He knew he needed some rest and maybe he could get it at Brandon’s place. “I’ll catch up with you in a minute. I just want to check on a couple of things first.”

“Cool, I’m parked on the 3rd floor of the garage.” Brandon said before giving Grayson one final pat on the back and leaving.

Grayson quickly finished his rounds, making sure each patient was doing well but lingered in Tonya’s room as his mind immediately thought about the old times, how they use to be together. He wasn’t sure if he was romanticizing their relationship and only remembering the good. But he knew that they had a lot of good times. They were each other’s first everything. They were best friends since they could talk, hell their mothers were best friends since they could talk. He didn’t know why he didn’t just reach out to her. It wasn’t like he couldn’t pick up a phone and talk to her and she could have done the same thing for that matter. She could have emailed him, called him, came to his apartment. What was holding them back? Maybe they just weren’t ready to see each other since there was some much history between them but were that wasn’t really a real excuse.

He sighed and willed those thoughts away from his mind as he stared down at her. Even in this state, she was beautiful. Her eyes were as big as he remember and probably still the rich brown that he remembered that seemed to peer into his soul. Her nose was slim and well defined. It was small button nose that twitched whenever she lied. It was her only one true tell and he remembered exploiting the hell out of it when they were younger. Tonya’s lips were just a full as he remembered. He briefly wondered if they were just as soft as they were when he was in high school. And her body, he could tell by the way the sheet s settled over her that she was still her voluptuous. He thought back to the time that he was bullied in school for dating the hottest girl in school who happened to be black and he was white. Nobody thought a geek like him deserved a girl as stacked as Tonya. She was packed in the front and the back with long legs to hold her up and beautiful long curly hair that swayed behind her as she walked. Yea, Tonya had everything going for her and she knew it which made it all the weirder that she chose him over Danny Reynolds, MVP of the Carver High school. 

But he knew that one thing changed about her for sure, he personality. The Tonya Winters he knew wouldn’t dare let a man so much as look at her cross-eyed, let alone raise his hand against. Who was this Kevin Masters?? Why would he do something as vile as hit a woman. He had to be insane.

“This must be a shock for you. You haven’t seen Tonya in almost 10 years and here she is now, fucked up by her husband.” Grayson turned around and saw Sophia standing behind him. Her arms were folded across her chest and she looked at him with a smirk on her lips but sadness in her eyes. “The nurse said that I could come back here. I’ll only be a minute. ”

“Sure, where’re your parents?”

“Still talking with the police,” She answered as she came to stand next to him and staring down at her sister. He briefly noted the clench of her fists. “I can’t believe that little fucker did this. I swear if I see his punk ass on the street, I’ll beat the shit out of him.”

“I don’t remember you having such a filthy mouth on you.”

“The last time I saw you I was 12 years old. Now, I’m a grown ass 22 year-old woman that just graduated from college. So, don’t fuck with me about my fuckin’ language. I am pissed off right now because of that ass-cunt Kevin.” 

“Yes Mam!” Grayson held his hands up in surrender and slowly backed away from Sophia and she rolled her eyes at his antics.

“In all seriousness, how is she Kyle?”


“She’s doing incredibly well. There’s nothing for you to worry about. Tonya’s a real trooper.”

“Yea. I hope that she gets better soon because Jr. needs his mother right now. He was home during Kevin’s attach and Kylie,” Sophia whistled, “That girl is a mess right now. She’s been in hysterics since the police brought them to Daddy and Ma’s house.” 

“Tonya has kids.”

Sophia nodded and held up two fingers, “Two and luckily not with Kevin. There twins.”

“Who’s the father?” He asked out of curiosity. He was sure that he wasn’t because then those kids would have to be nine or something and even then there was no guarantee that right after they broke up, Tonya got pregnant. 

“I didn’t ask and Tonya didn’t tell. I know how to mine my own business. Unlike some people,” She said as she gave him a hard look. “Ma wanted me to invite you to dinner this weekend. We still live at the same place and dinner is at 7 o’clock on the dot as always so be there on time. I have to go so I can watch over them kids. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yea, sure. I’m Tonya’s personal doctor so I’ll always be around.”

“Good, I’m sure she’ll like that.”

Sophia left the room in a hurry and he followed behind her. Brandon was most likely going to kill him for taking so long and he was right. Grayson needed as much rest as possible if he was going to fast tomorrow with a clear head.