Education and Compensation

Matheson listened to the steady sound of Valysia's breathing. He knew that she was sound asleep. His body was exhausted, but his mind was still wide awake, attempting to process all that had happened to him that day.

His meeting with his father the prior day had surprised him. If he had ever doubted the depth of his father's love for him, his perspective had changed considerably after that conversation in his office. Gregory had even called him that night and encouraged him not to dwell on the aspect of not being able to perform sexually, but to concentrate on the relationship he had with Val.

Matheson had then made up his mind to talk to her, to tell her everything, and to seek her forgiveness. When he did, it was if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He had confessed his insecurities to her on the way to their counseling session and she had listened intently without passing judgment. When he had first approached her with her favorite chocolate cake, the roses and the almond milk, he wasn't exactly sure how she would respond. Things had turned out much better than he had expected.

The meeting with Reverend Williamson had been very productive. Reverend Williamson had been the pastor of the church for forty years. He was seventy years old, and full of wisdom. Matheson remembered him from his childhood, when Mavis used to take him with her to church. He could still recall the day that he went to the altar for prayer, and Reverend Williamson had put his hand on his head and prayed for him. He had immediately felt heat rush over his body as the Reverend prayed, and Matheson had begun to cry, though he hadn't understood why. Matheson remembered that the congregation had become excited and that he'd heard a voice in his head telling him that he was loved. All of it had been confusing and overwhelming for a six year old boy, yet he knew that he could never forget that day. He recalled leaving the church feeling special because Reverend Williamson had told him that Jesus had indeed touched him.

The counseling session had gone well, with Reverend Williamson telling them the duties and responsibilities of marriage. He'd then instructed them to come back for their second session on Monday. It was only when they'd left the session that Matheson had realized that he was truly exhausted. He had been working fourteen-hour shifts for the last six days, and it was taking a toll on him. The rush of adrenaline he'd felt when they had first made up had worn off, and he had ached all over.

He'd told Val that he was tired, and asked her to drive. Matheson had immediately recognized the concern that was on her face. She'd then drove him back to her apartment, insisting that he stay over for the night. He hadn't argued with her, and had done as she'd suggested. They'd showered together, but while his mind had wanted to make love to her, his body would not cooperate. It was a familiar dilemma, and he had been deeply ashamed.

"This is what I was afraid of." he'd told Val, not meeting her eyes as they left the shower. He had wondered what she would do, how she would respond. Would she become angry at him? Would she openly show her disappointment, her scorn?

"Matheson, you've been working like a dog. Don't beat yourself up about it." she'd responded.

Her words had been little comfort for him. Impotence made him feel like less of a man. He felt that lots of men worked hard, and were still able to take care of business. It was times like these that made him feel like a failure, and he had told her as much.

Her response had been to make him lie on the bed after their shower together, and she had massaged his muscles. She'd kept telling him that she loved him, and that it wasn't about his performance. She had told him that she wanted to just express her love for him. She had then proceeded to kiss him as she continued to massage him. She'd insisted that he relax and she'd told him that under no circumstances, even if he got an erection were they going to have intercourse that night.

He had tried to relax once she'd told him this, as the pressure to perform decreased, somewhat. He had attempted to relax and take what she was offering him. Her hands had been everywhere, and so had her lips. She'd kissed his eyes and his nose. She'd massaged his scalp as she kissed his chin. She had run her tongue over his lips before kissing him deeply. She'd licked his ear, while gently pinching his nipples, which had sent shivers over his body. She'd seemed to be everywhere at once, and he had kept his eyes closed as instructed and relaxed as much as he could.

Matheson hadn't really expected her to do anything with his flaccid member, but she had cradled it lovingly in her hands and then taken it into her mouth. The suction of her mouth and the dancing of her tongue on him had made him quiver. He'd instantly become hot and aroused, even though he hadn't been erect, which was something that he hadn't quite understood. He'd opened his eyes and watched her. She'd smiled up at him as she had continued to kiss and massage him; and she'd then taken his scrotum, and had begun sucking gently. He had only been semi-hard then, but he had felt as if he were going to explode. There had been a war going on between his mind and body. He had wanted to be inside her badly, but he had known that he couldn't penetrate her, at that point.

He had risen up off of the bed, moaning her name, as she had continued her sensual assault; her hands kneading, and her tongue, wet and hot, her lips soft and caressing, had elicited responses and feelings from him that he had never before experienced. He had found himself unable to keep still, as her tongue and hands left a burning trail of fire. She'd then found his perineum, which had caused his whole body to slowly relax, as her tongue had explored the sensitive area. No woman had ever sucked his balls before, and certainly no one had ever put their tongue so close to his anus- as she had done -causing him to moan uncontrollably. Never had he felt like this, so aroused, yet not erect; so hot and so loved. After a few minutes of attention in that area, she had returned to his member and he'd soon felt himself being drawn toward orgasm, even though he still hadn't achieved a full erection. The orgasm had been unexpectedly intense and immediately thereafter, his penis had returned to its totally flaccid state. She had kissed its head, and then laid down beside him.

Val had kissed his lips, grinning impishly. "Now go to sleep!" she'd instructed, turning out the light before she'd turned her back to him and nestled close to him, with her butt against his stomach. He had been perplexed by her behavior.

"Val, what about you?" he'd asked amazed, that she was ready to go to sleep. "I can go down on you- in fact I want to-" he had stammered, not willing to just take what she'd offered. He had felt that he had to do something, after that mind-blowing experience.

"Sorry, no thanks." She'd murmured.

"Why not?"

"Matheson, tonight wasn't about pleasing me. It was about you." She had replied. "I didn't do this to receive. I just wanted to give. Take my gift, and go to sleep."

She had turned over and faced him. He hadn't been able to see her expression, but he had heard the love in her voice. "I love you, Matheson Hendricks." She'd whispered. "Whether you are the number one stud, or whether you are at what you perceive to be your worst, I still love you. You need to have that confidence in me and in yourself; that whether you can fuck me senseless, or not give me anything at all, my love doesn't change. Do you understand that?"

He had been quiet for a moment. "I…I guess so" he'd ventured. "I want to believe that."

"Good!" she'd replied, kissing him again, and then turning back over. "Good night."

Now he lay in the dark, listening to the sound of her steady breathing, totally relaxed. If he didn't know any better, he would think that she had been totally satisfied. Even though she hadn't received anything from him, she did appear perfectly content. Never had he been in this situation before. He pulled her closer to him and kissed her shoulder. He heard her mumble in her sleep, and he closed his eyes. Matheson sighed, feeling relaxed and content for the first time in weeks. He couldn't wait until he was married to this incredible woman.

                                            ((***))

Val awoke to the smell of bacon, and her mouth began to water. She sat up in bed and realized that it must be Matheson cooking. The clock on the nightstand said that it was after ten. She got up, put on her robe, and went to find him in the kitchen.

"Hey there, Sleepyhead." he said, grinning from ear to ear. "Today we have bacon and eggs, hash browns, corned beef hash, and pancakes. For your drinking pleasure, we have coffee and orange juice."

"It smells delicious!" Val remarked, pulling up a stool to the island. "I wasn't expecting all this. I doubt I could eat it all, anyway. Did you go to the store? I didn't have all this in my fridge."

Matheson sat a plate in front of her. "Yes, I went to the store. You were sleeping like a log." He then sat in front of her with a plate of his own. "I wanted to surprise you." He said.

Val smiled at him. "I'm surprised."

She quickly took his hands in hers and said a prayer. She then began eating the plate of food he had given her.

"So, do you have plans for today?" he asked.

"I'm afraid I do." Val replied. "I didn't know you were coming over. I have to meet Grandma." She smiled at him between forkfuls of food. "I hope you aren't disappointed."

"Not at all." Matheson replied. "I have a few things to do myself. Maybe we can get together this evening. My parents have been asking about you."

"I'd love to see them." she replied.

Matheson left Val's apartment, after they had cleaned up the kitchen together. He would have loved to take her back to bed, but Mavis was expecting her. No matter. He was off for the rest of the weekend, and he knew that when he returned to her, he would be ready.

He drove back to his condo and decided to relax. He hadn't risen that morning as early as he normally did, but he had a habit of waking up at five and this morning wasn't any different. It was at that point that he decided to get up and prepare breakfast. It was the least he could do. He walked in the door of his apartment and noticed that his mail was piling up where he had thrown it each evening when he came home, too tired to open any of it.

He gathered it up and took it to his bedroom, sitting on the bed to go through it. He noticed an eight-by-ten envelope with no return address. Curious, he opened it and was surprised when several photos fell out.

He was surprised when he saw that they were pictures of Val in the club. One picture showed her with a man. Matheson guessed it to be Matthew, the guy who had spiked her drink. She was smiling, and he had his hand on her knee.

Madison felt a nerve began to tick in his jaw. There was another one with Matthew kissing her on her neck, while his hand appeared to be under her skirt. The final picture was of the two of them dancing. All three of the pictures were of poor quality and very grainy, but there was no mistaking their content. Matheson became filled with anger all over again, but then thought of his night with Val. It had been so wonderful, so special. He quickly tore up the pictures and threw them in the trash. It was all coming together, now. The pictures proved to him that someone was trying to sabotage their relationship. The man- Matthew -must have been some sort of plant, whose sole task was to seduce Val while someone else took the pictures.

His thoughts went quickly to Tameka. Maybe she could shed some light on this situation. He hastily searched through his dresser for the card he had confiscated from Val. He hadn't thrown away the card with Matthew's number on it, since he had toyed with the idea of confronting the man.

He didn't have Tameka's number, but he knew where she lived. He got up, and after finding Matthew's number, decided to give Tameka a visit. He grabbed his keys and walked out of the door.

Fifteen minutes later, Matheson pulled into the parking lot of the apartment complex where Tameka lived. He looked around for the red Ford Focus she drove, and spotted it parked nearby. Several men were watching him from the corner as he got out of the car.

"Hey, man." one of them called, approaching him. "What you need?"

Matheson was surprised, and realized that the man was offering him drugs.

"Nothing, thanks." He replied, locking his car.

"I got the best." the man persisted. "If you don't want to score, then why you here? Are you slumming or something?"

"Just visiting a friend." Matheson replied, walking off.

The man looked at him, and then looked back at his black BMW.

"Yeah, I bet."

Matheson felt the man watching him as he climbed the steps to Tameka's apartment.

Tameka was shocked when she opened the door and Val's boyfriend was standing there.

"Hello, Tameka." he said. "May I come in?"

"Sure." Tameka said, opening the door wider.

She led Matheson into her living room, and he sat down.

"What can I do for you, Matheson?" she asked, nervously. She wondered if he had found out her part in what had happened to Val. How could he have found out?

"I want to talk to you about what happened to you and Val at the club." Matheson explained. "I have reason to believe that the meeting between her and that man Matthew wasn't just a chance meeting. I believe it was some sort of setup. If that's true, then your rape may also have been premeditated."

"What makes you think that?" Tameka asked, nervously wiping her hands on the side of her pants.

"Someone sent me several photos of Val and that man in the club. Needless to say, they were very incriminating photos, and I am sure they were sent to me to ensure the end of our relationship."

Tameka stood up. "Do you have any idea who would do such a thing?"

"I have my suspicions." Matheson replied. "Did you see anyone taking pictures at the club while you were there?"

"I try not to recall that night. I still have nightmares." Tameka responded, evasively.

Matheson walked over to her and put his arm around her shoulders. "I'm so sorry. I know this must be hard for you. I can't imagine what you've been through."

His gesture took her totally by surprise. Tameka suddenly felt overwhelmed and began to cry. It was just too much! She thought about the nasty things William Hendricks had said to her, and now his grandson was behaving in a totally different manner.

She didn't know what she was going to do. She felt that she was the cause of Matheson and Val breaking up, in the first place. "It's all my fault!" she cried. "I was the one who insisted on going to that club-"

"It's not your fault-" Matheson insisted.

"But I caused you and Val to break up-"

"We're back together again." Matheson said, smiling at her. "We're together, and the wedding is going on as planned. Our relationship is stronger than ever."

Tameka stared at him in disbelief.

"You…you're back together?" she asked wiping her eyes.

"Yes, so don't be blaming yourself. This is not your fault." Matheson continued. "I have the number of that fellow, Matthew, who was with you at the club. I need to talk to him, so I want you to do me a favor."

"What?" Tameka asked, still trying to decide whether or not to tell Matheson her part in all of this.

"I want you to call him, pretend that you are Val, and ask him to meet you. I'll give you an address to send him."

Tameka tried not to panic. "It'll never work." She insisted. "He probably knows what happened to me, and will think that it's some sort of setup!"

"How would he know what happened to you, unless he was in on it, Tameka?" Matheson reasoned. "I believe that the guy that attacked you most likely doesn't even know this guy Matthew. There were a lot of people in the club that night, right?"

"I guess" Tameka replied slowly. She wasn't going to debate that fact with Matheson. He had no idea that Holby and Matthew were working together, and she wasn't about to be the one to tell him!

Tameka didn't know what to do. Should she tell Matheson everything, or should she just play along?

She took the card from Matheson's hand and dialed the number, as he requested.

"Hello?"

"Matthew, this is Val." Tameka lied.

"Who?"

"You know, Valysia. We met at the club several weeks ago, remember?" Tameka said watching as Matheson wrote on a piece of paper things he wanted her to say.

"Oh yeah, Val. How's it going? I wasn't expecting to hear from you ever again. What about that fiancé you told me about?"

Tameka read what Matheson had scribbled on the paper. "Oh, we broke up."

"Really?" Matthew replied, clearly interested. "Well, his loss is my gain. Why don't we go out tonight?"

Tameka looked at Matheson, who was still writing.

"I'd like that" she replied slowly, as she read from the paper. "But I can't go out tonight. Why don't you let me buy you lunch today?"

"I like a woman who believes in equality!" Matthew replied, laughing.

Tameka gave Matthew the address that Matheson provided, realizing that he had planned on meeting Matthew at Hannah's.

"What are you going to do?" Tameka asked him, after she closed her cell.

"I'm going to meet him, and we are going to have a little talk" Matheson replied.

Tameka tried not to panic. "What do you hope to find out? Is this really necessary?"

"Oh, yes it's very necessary." Matheson said angrily. "I want to know who set you and Val up and I won't rest until I get to the bottom this mess. You were raped and Val was drugged! Whoever masterminded this mess is going to pay and pay dearly!"

He walked across the room, heading for the door, and Tameka tried to remain calm.

"Matheson! I don't know if this is such a great idea! What if he gets violent?" she hedged.

Matheson turned to her, his face a barely concealed mask of rage. Tameka didn't know that much about Matheson, and she had only seen him a few times, but never had she seen him like this. "Matheson, think for a minute! What if he does admit to drugging Val? You don't need to lose your cool and end up in jail! What about your upcoming wedding? What about your future?"

Matheson looked at her, and his face softened a bit. "Don't worry about me; I will control myself. However, just to be on the safe side, give me the name and number of the detective, who's handling your case, I want to fill him in."

Of all the things she expected him to say, this was the last thing she wanted to hear. If Matthew talked, it would tie back to William Hendricks. Would Matthew then give her up to Matheson and Val? If she didn't come clean, she knew that Val would never forgive her. However, if she did come clean, then neither of them would ever speak to her again. She would just have to take her chances.

"Look Matheson," she said slowly, her mind racing. "How will you know he's telling the truth? He's liable to say anything. He may even say that there was no drug, and that Val was all over him. He may say that I asked for what I got, or that I must be the one who drugged Val. Who knows what he could say! After all, if I had never suggested that we go to the club that night, none of this would have ever happened."

"That's ridiculous!" Matheson replied. "Val and I both realize that this isn't your fault. Most likely, he had been tracking her for quite some time, saw an opportunity to take advantage of her, and acted on it."

He walked to the door, and Tameka didn't try to stop him. "Thanks for the help." He replied, smiling at her. "And by the way, call your cousin. She's worried about you."

Tameka closed her eyes and heard him shut the door. She felt that she was sinking deeper in the quagmire of lies and deception she had created, and wondered what in the world she was going to do.

                                                     ((***))

Hannah waited in the hotel lobby, somewhat anxious about her date with Emilio. She had given Matheson Emilio's card when her nephew came to visit several weeks earlier, but she had failed to tell him that she had already called Emilio and asked him out, six weeks before. They had been going out quite often and she was beginning to rack up the frequent flier miles. She could still remember the night of their first date, which was several weeks after they first met.

Never had she approached a man before, and a part of her had hoped that he would reject her offer, so that she wouldn't have to go through with it. She had been somewhat surprised, however, when he had told her that he did remember her, and that he would love to go out with her. She hadn't told him that she was in Florida and that she would have to catch a plane to Baltimore. He would have most likely thought that she was either a nut, or a desperate spinster, for sure.

She recalled waiting in the Fabulous Steak & Shrimp Restaurant a week after her call to him, and wondering if he would show up. She had caught an early flight and checked into the Omni Hotel, wondering if she could really go through with it. She hadn't called her brother or Matheson. They would probably have said she was crazy...well maybe not Matheson.

The restaurant had been quite busy on a Friday night. She had worn aqua top and black slacks, and she had hoped that Emilio would approve.

Hannah had spotted him when he walked into the restaurant, and watched as he was led to her table.

"Hello" he had said, smiling at her.

"Hi" Hannah had said nervously.

Emilio had pulled up a chair and sat down. "I must say that I was surprised when you called." He grinned at her, showing perfectly white teeth. "It's been several weeks since we first talked, you know."

"Yes, that is true" Hannah had admitted. "I..I just couldn't get up the nerve to contact you."

"And why is that?" he'd asked, reaching across the table and covering her hand with his.

Hannah had blushed deeply. "Normally a woman doesn't ask the man out." she admitted. "Plus, you look somewhat younger..." She had allowed her voice to trail off as the waiter approached their table.

"We may be closer in age than you think." Emilio replied, laughing. "I doubt if you asked me out because of my age, now did you?"

Hannah had smiled. He was so handsome and he had a voice that reminded her of that actor that played Puss in Boots...Antonio What's-His-Name. His Hispanic accent only made him sound even sexier over the phone than she had remembered him being, in person.

Matheson had been right. She needed to live her life and take some risks, and nothing was riskier than going out with sexy Puss in Boots.

Six weeks...she had been seeing him for six weekends in a row. Tonight, he had asked if he could pick her up and take her out instead of her meeting him at a restaurant. She had finally told him that she lived out of town, and that he would have to pick her up at her hotel.

She watched as he walked into the lobby carrying a vase with pink roses. Her heart skipped a beat.

"Hello, Hannah" he said, walking over to her. He handed her the vase of flowers and kissed her on the cheek. "I hope you find these acceptable." He said, smiling.

"They're beautiful." she replied. "I've got to take them back to my room."

"Of course." he agreed.

He walked with her to the elevator and followed her up to her room. She walked into the suite and put the vase on the dresser.

"This is very nice." Emilio said, looking around.

"Where are we going tonight?" Hannah asked, smiling.

Emilio stared at her with an expression on his face that was unfamiliar to her. "Where do you want to go, Hannah?" He asked, his voice low and husky.

Hannah's mouth felt as if it was full of cotton. He walked over to her, and the scent of his cologne invaded her nostrils. He was looking at her like...well, he was looking at her! Before she could think of what to say, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. They had kissed before, but this kiss was not like the goodnight kisses they had shared previously. His mouth strayed to her neck and she felt his hand on her breast.

"Mi Carino…"she heard him whisper as he continued to kiss her.

"I want you, Hannah." he was saying, through the haze of fog that now filled her brain. She heard him speaking low in Spanish, but didn't understand what he was saying. Hannah couldn't think straight. What was she supposed to do now? She hadn't expected this to happen, even though she knew that it was possible that he would desire her. What was she going to tell him, that she was a sixty year old virgin? Would he laugh in her face?

"Emilio, I...don't know what to say." she said, pulling away from him and walking across the room.

He stared at her a moment. "I gather, from your protest, that the feeling is not mutual?" he asked. "We've been seeing each other for a while, now. My daughter is asking me where I am going every weekend. What do I tell her, Hannah? I want more from you than just one date on Friday night."

"Emilio, I'm sorry" Hannah replied, still stunned. She watched as his face fell, his disappointment obvious.

"I see. I have misread you, Hannah. I was hoping for more. Perhaps you were not looking for more than friendship. I apologize." He then turned and headed for the door.

"Emilio, wait." Hannah gasped, as she watched him open the door.

He turned to her. "Yes, Hannah?"

"I want more than friendship from you." she admitted. "It's just that..."

"What?" he asked, closing the door and walking over to her. "Is there someone else? Are you ashamed to introduce me to your family? Why do we continue to meet like this? I am a family man, Hannah. I work hard. I am only a laborer, and not a rich like your family. Is this why you are ashamed of me?"

Hannah sat on the side of the bed. "I'm not ashamed of you, Emilio. I'm still shocked that you are even interested in me."

Emilio looked amused. "What man would not be interested, Hannah? You are a beautiful woman. You know this. We are older adults, we are not teenagers. Let us not play games."

Hannah tried to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. "I'm not playing games, Emilio and I'm not ashamed of you. I'm ashamed of myself. It's just that I have never been in a romantic relationship before."

Emilio stared at her in disbelief. "What are you saying, Hannah? Surely you have dated. Surely you've been in love before?"

Hannah shook her head and didn't reply. She avoided looking at him directly. Surely he must think that she was some sort of freak.

"You are a virgin, no?" he asked, sitting next to her on the bed. "Is this why you are ashamed?"

"Yes." she admitted, as the tears began to fall. "I feel so foolish."

"There is no need to feel foolish." Emilio replied, wiping her eyes with his handkerchief. "Are you afraid of men?"

"No, I'm not afraid." she replied. "No man has ever wanted me before. I dedicated my life to teaching and helping others. I used to wear long, dark dresses, my hair was long and grey, and I wore it in a bun. My nephew changed all that. He told me that I needed to change my appearance, and I did as he suggested."

Emilio reached up and brushed her hair back from her eyes. "Ah, so you color your hair? It is very becoming. Your eyes are the color of the sea, my Hannah. You would be an easy person to love."

Hannah looked down at her hands. "I'm sixty years old. I'm old; My body is old."

"I am fifty-three." Emilio replied, taking her hand in his. "See, there is not that much space between us."

Hannah smiled. "I guess not. Do you really want to be in a relationship with me?" she asked looking hopeful.

"I do not say what I do not mean" Emilio replied. "My family is asking questions. I told them that I would bring you to meet them, soon. I will not rush you. I will take my time. The first time for anyone is supposed to be special."

"I do not want to wait." She confessed, looking at him. "I have waited much too long already. I want to know what it's really like..." She lowered her voice to a whisper. "I want to know what its like to make love."

Emilio leaned over and kissed her, and for some reason, she immediately thought about Emily and what she had told her the day that Hannah had caught her and Gregory making love in the hallway.

"There's a man out there for you somewhere, Hannah. Why don't you stop being a sour pussy and go out there and find him and fuck him senseless."

For the first time in her life, Hannah wanted to take Emily up on her suggestion.