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This is the end my friends. Thank you so much for reading1




Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.


 

Scott spent the rest of week at the house on Whidbey Island. On the weekend, Deidre came to see him.

Scott was in his favorite spot watching the waves crash when he heard the familiar sound of wheels crunching the gravel. He did not turn around when he heard the engine stop, nor did he turn around when he heard the door open and slam close.

For the most part, Deidre left Scott left to sort things out by himself. She called every day and offered him an ear to listen if he wanted to talk, but he usually hurried off the phone. Deidre always asked if he wanted to speak to the girls, and Scott’s answer was always the same. The last time they talked on the phone, Deidre told him about her plans to come up at the end of the week. So Scott was not surprised when she stepped up next to him.

"How are you?" Deidre asked.

"I'm okay. I talked to Chase yesterday. He said he wants me to come in for some follow up tests and if they're all clear I can go back to work in the next couple of weeks." Scott said.

"Oh, that's good. Do you need a ride?"

“No, I already asked Hannah if she could take me.” Scott said.

Deidre nodded her head. Scott could tell she was still disappointed; he could feel it in the silence.

"Look Deidre, I don't remember anything, and it's frustrating. When I do go back to work and I come back to the city, I don't think I can stay in the same house as you, Gabby, Tess and Rachel. I'll get a hotel room or stay with Hannah."

"You don't want to stay with Hannah."

"Why not?" Scott asked.

"She lives with her fiancé," Deidre explained.

"Hannah's engaged? Wow, I didn't notice the ring."

"It's understandable. But Scott, you don't have to stay somewhere else. I want you to stay with us. You can sleep in the guest room if you want Scott. Just don't stay away, don't avoid us." Deidre pleaded.

"I think it would be best if I didn't stay with you and the girls. It will only confuse them, and me further."

"Maybe the familiarity of the house, of our routine will make something click."

"I doubt it. I've been here in our vacation house this entire week. I've looked at all the pictures and art work and nothing comes to me. Everything is foreign. I'm sorry Deidre." Scott said turning to look at her for the first time since she arrived.

"So am I." Deidre turned around and got back into the car.

Scott faced the water again and tried not to think about the emptiness he felt inside as Deidre drove away.

Deidre arrived home later in the evening than she expected. After leaving Scott at the house on Whidbey Island, Deidre drove around for a couple of hours listening to the radio and trying to clear her head.  The Scott she was dealing with was not the man she knew. Each day it became harder to cope with that fact.

As she walked into the house, Deidre embraced the silence. Hannah and her fiancé had the girls for the night. They would all be by in the morning.

Taking her mother and mother-in-law’s advice, Deidre changed into her pajamas turned on the radio and cried. She let everything she was feeling out into the empty room.

The next morning, dressed in track pants and a t-shirt, Deidre cleaned the house to the sounds of soulful sad songs by artists like Mary J. Blige, Mariah Carey and Toni Braxton to name a few. When Hannah let herself inside she could hear Deidre singing along to Tamia’s “Officially Missing You.”

“Aunt Hannah,” Gabby said. “Why mommy sing so loud?”

“I never heard this song ‘afore.” Tess chimed in.

“That’s because this song is older than Rachel.” Hannah said. “Why don’t you guys take your book bags to your room and I’ll talk to your mom.”

Hannah found Deidre in the garage organizing boxes. As she moved them around, she swayed along to the song.

“So this is what you do when we leave you alone—sing sad songs while cleaning.” Hannah said.

Deidre picked up a remote and paused the music. “I didn’t know you guys were back. Where’s your future hubby?”

“Emergency at the hospital. Explain to me again why I’m marrying a doctor? I must be crazy.” Hannah asked.

Deidre just smiled. “Are the girls putting their stuff up?”

“Yeah.” Hannah replied. “I see you’re getting better at expressing your feelings.”

“It’s so much easier when there’s a song that does it for me.” Deidre joked.

“I’m guessing from your song selection it didn’t go well yesterday.”

“No it didn’t.” Deidre sighed. “I still don’t know what to do or how to help him. I know the man I married, the man I fell in love with, the man who is my best friend is in there somewhere. But I don’t know how to show him he can be that person if he wants to. So I think I’m just going to step back. I’m not going to push.”

“Are you capable of doing that?” Hannah asked.

“I honestly don’t know.” Deidre said.

Two months passed since his accident, and Scott still did not remember anything about his life. He was sitting in the hospital cafeteria thinking, something he was doing a lot of since he lost his memory. He went back to work after Chase gave him the all clear.

Walking through the halls of the hospital felt the same as it always had, or at least that was what Scott kept telling himself. He saw Deidre every few days in the hospital. And every time he felt like he was walking on eggshells.

After going back to work and to the city, Scott got a hotel room like he told Deidre he would. There was just something that did not feel right to him about staying in the same house as Deidre and the girls; he did not want to pretend everything was fine when it was not.

Once a week Deidre called and talked to him about things not related to the hospital. He never initiated the contact; he was keeping himself away. Scott also did not make any effort to see Rachel, Gabby and Tess since they were all at the vacation house on Whidbey; it was his choice. In the beginning, his reasoning was that he did not want to put on a charade. Children were observant, and he knew that the girls would see right through it. As the weeks wore on, he avoided Rachel, Gabby and Tess because he felt guilty for staying away in the first place.

Hannah had become Scott's only confidant, and even she was upset with him. She talked to him because she was his sister and that was what she was supposed to do. However, she always expressed her distaste of his decision to stay away from his family. They talked on the phone every day and every day she told him the same thing: stop being an ass and be a man. It never worked.

Scott looked around the room; the occupants filled each table with lively conversation, and he was sitting by himself. Most people around the hospital had heard about his amnesia and the news about his relationship with Deidre was out. But no one was overly sympathetic. Everyone saw the small change that had occurred in the fierce, take-no-prisoners lawyer, Deidre James. And they all blamed him. He closed his eyes; he hated that stare, the one that said you ruined everything and broke one of the strongest people who works in this hospital.

Having finished his meal, Scott stood up from the table and threw out his trash. He then went to check the surgery board. When he arrived, he found Deidre arguing with a surgical intern—one of the less skilled interns who no one thought would make a decent surgeon.

Not seeing any surgeries he wanted to sit in on, he turned around and walked away.

That night, Scott got back to his hotel room and looked around. He was so lonely. Worst of all, he was hurting people. This was never the life he had wanted for himself. Although, now he was not sure what kind of life he did want for himself. He just knew this was not it.

After wallowing in self-pity for a couple of hours, Scott thought back to the conversation he had with David two months ago. He was not trying. And Scott was beginning to see his father in himself, and that was not a good thing. With the new realization, Scott picked up his keys and left.

Driving through the neighborhood, Scott looked around and smiled to himself. It really was nice. The sun was setting and the streetlights were starting to come on. The kids on the sidewalks all looked as if they were racing to their homes before their parents got upset.

Scott pulled the car into the driveway of a brick home with black shutters. From the exterior, the house looked as if all was well with the family that resided there. No one could ever tell, just by looking at the outside, that the family inside was broken and in pain.

He sat in the car, with his head on the steering wheel. He was not quite ready to do what he needed to do. Scott was about to open the driver side door when it happened; the first ray of hope in the past two months broke through. He closed his eyes and let his mind wander back to a memory that had been locked away…

____________________________________________________ 

Scott had just put Rachel to bed, and he was watching his wife place one of their two-month-old daughters in her crib. Deidre looked up, turned her head and smiled. She put her finger to her lips as she joined Scott in the hallway.

"Hey, is Rachel sleep?" She asked as she pulled the door almost completely closed leaving a crack so they would be able to hear the twins if they needed anything.

"Yeah. I had to read two books and chase away any left over monsters, and monsters that apparently followed us here." Scott smiled as they walked to their bedroom. "Did you know we had monsters in the other house?"

"Of course I did. Apparently they only decided to show up whenever you weren't there. I'm not quite sure why that was though."

"Maybe they were afraid of me?"

"I doubt it. You like to play all tough, but you’re a softie on the inside" Deidre said changing out of her clothes.

"I’m not sure that’s a good thing," Scott said walking up behind her.

"You might think it’s not, but it’s one of the things that makes you such a good guy.” Deidre said turning around.

“Oh really? I’m a good guy?” He asked snaking his hands up her scantily clad torso.

“Yeah,” Deidre smiled.

“Would a good guy do this?” Scott asked as his hands started to move south.

“Most definitely.” Deidre smiled before rewarding him with a hungry kiss.

______________________________________________________

Opening his eyes, Scott got out of the car and made his way up the front steps of the house. He rang the doorbell and waited anxiously on the stoop.

Deidre was on the phone when she heard the doorbell ring. She looked out the side window and saw Scott standing, waiting for her to open the door. She ended the call and opened the door. "Hey," she said as she stepped aside allowing him to enter.

"Hi. Where are the girls?" He asked looking around before he crossed the threshold.

"They're upstairs in the play room." Deidre closed the door and walked into the kitchen. Scott followed her. She put dishes from dinner into the dishwasher before either of them said anything. "Why are you here? It's been two months and now you're here in the kitchen just standing and not saying anything."

"Did I ever tell you what my greatest fear was Deidre?" He asked.

Deidre sighed and shook her head. "No you didn't."

He moved closer to where she was standing, but not so close that he would be invading her personal space. "I’m terrified that I’ll become my father. He hurt us, my mother and me. And I never want to be the type of person who hurts the people I mean the most to. In the past, I tried to never let anyone get close. If they weren’t close to me, then there would be no way of hurting them. And here I am now doing to you and our daughters what I swore I’d never do. My dad was also lazy and he never made an effort to be any better. And now I’m not trying. I seem to be doing all of the things I never intended to do.” Scott explained.

Deidre looked at her husband and watched as he continued to speak. “Deidre I don’t want to be the person I’m turning into. I don’t want to look back and wonder how things would have been different if I had put some effort into rebuilding a relationship with you. I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm here now and I want to try and make this work. I need this to work, not for me but for my daughters."

"I've been here, we've been here the entire time Scott," Deidre said angrily. Over the past two months the walls she had built up before she met Scott, started to reappear.

"I know. I don’t expect things to go smoothly right away. We can start slow if you want. I just refuse to not try."

Deidre closed her eyes to the tears that were trying to fall. Her arms were folded tightly against her body. “Scott,” Deidre started as she shook her head. She did not know if she could take him coming back into her life only to leave again.

“Let me try Deidre.” Scott said finally invading her space.

Deidre opened her eyes and looked up. Scott could see the unshed tears in her eyes and he was at a loss for what to do. So he did the only thing that seemed natural. He pulled her into a hug.

After a few minutes, Deidre pulled out of his embrace. “So, how do we do this?”

“I can continue to stay at the hotel or get an apartment or possibly stay here in the guest room.”

“I…” Deidre started. “We have an apartment above the garage. It’s not big but it has it’s own entrance but you’ll still be here for the girls.” Deidre said.

“Okay.” Scott said.

“I know it’s probably not ideal, but I don’t think I can let you back in, at least not right away.”

“I completely understand.”

Deidre took a deep breath. “Okay.”

Scott depicted a faint smile forming on Deidre’s face. “While I was sitting in the car, I remembered one of our first nights in this house,” Scott started. “I remembered putting the girls to sleep, our conversation and other things.” Scott smirked.

“Oh Really?” Deidre said raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah," Scott’s smirk widened into a grin.

Deidre rolled her eyes.

"I don't remember anything else though.” Scott said more seriously. “And I'm counting on you to help me through the whole parenting thing. All I remember is that apparently we have a monster infestation."

"We do. They moved from Rachel’s room to Gabby and Tess’ room. But since your back I think that takes care of the problem." Deidre said.

"We can do this right?" Scott asked.

Deidre leaned back on the counter with her arms folded once again. She looked down and then back up at Scott who was waiting for an answer, "yeah, I think we can."

"Mommy, mommy, can we have ice cream… DADDY!" Gabby yelled as she ran into the kitchen.

Scott bent down and pick up Gabby. Rachel and Tess followed closely behind their sister into the room, but both stayed close by Deidre.

"Hi gorgeous," Scott smiled.

"I missed you daddy. Do you 'member now?" Gabby asked.

"I don't remember everything, I don’t remember a lot of things.” Scott looked past Gabby and made eye contact with Deidre, “But I’m going to be here with you guys so we can make new memories,” he looked back down to his daughter, “is that okay?”

Gabby nodded her head enthusiastically before wrapping her arms around Scott’s neck. Tess followed Gabby’s lead and ran over to Scott and received a large hug from him as well.

Rachel walked over to Scott. She looked at him suspiciously and motioned for him to come down to her level with her finger. Scott squatted on he floor.

Rachel stepped closer and hugged her father, "don't leave us again daddy. You made mommy cry." She whispered into his ear.

"I won't." Scott said.

 

 










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