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One Life to Live is not mine *does a toe touch*  Just a little drabble that crept into my head.  It's out now so headed back to A/U land. 





Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.


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Todd Manning and Evangeline Williamson

 

 What She Didn't Say by BlackMamba

 

Evangeline? Wake up Evangeline--

It didn't happen all at once. There were sounds and light-voices and then nothing. She didn't know how long it took for things to make sense again. They tried to explain what happened-why her legs didn't work and it hurt to breathe. The side effects of the coma-no big deal-it would all get better with time. This was said with a forced smile dripping with compassion and pity.

Then she tried to speak and even those went away.

Layla sat on her bed, rubbing her hand the way she used to when they were kids while the doctor gave her condition a name--aphasia. The gas almost killed her-put her in cardiac arrest which slowed blood flow to her brain. He told her it wasn't permanent with a pat on her leg and a glance towards the door. Layla stayed with her-whispering encouragement while she looked at Evangeline like a stranger.

She didn't cry that night or next. It seemed selfish-giving into self pity when she'd been gone for so long. But her head raced just like before---always analyzing her surroundings-trying to figure out all the whys and how's of her condition-coming to terms with the possibility she'd never speak again. Words were what she was before-everything about her was tied up in some motion, brief or closing statement. She didn't realize how much she took the ease of turning a phrase for granted. Now she couldn't even ask to be left alone.

There were so many people during the week after her diagnosis. Her mother came-positive as always, vowing to find the best speech pathologists in the country. Nora came next with Matthew hovering behind her, asking if she could help but receiving only a grunt in return. By the time Lisa Williamson allowed others to visit daughter-a few therapy sessions had passed and she was able to form simple words like "no" and "ba-"(which meant bathroom) and scribble her initials when forced to sign insurance documents.

Cristian came first and she tried to tell him she was sorry but it came out backwards and garbled. He told her about Sarah and how much she'd helped him deal with his life without her in it. Evangeline wanted to ask why he'd waited---but again the words wouldn't come-and her tongue twisted over the a few syllables before she gave up and buried her head in the pillow. He'd stayed a moment longer and then left her alone. He came back once and she didn't see him again.

John came next and by that time her vocabulary had expanded somewhat-even though her words got mixed up sometimes-like reaching for her cup and stuttering "apple." As always he had trouble looking her in the eye. She wanted to tell him he didn't have to worry but she didn't bother this time. Instead she covered his hand with hers and nodded-which got her a sad smile in return. After two more visits he stopped coming too.

They all came at first-Bo and Vicki-Jessica, Michael and Marcie. Layla was always present-hovering, quick to pick up a spoon or help her with her food tray. Before it would have been irritating and she'd have told her so without hesitation. But now she just watched her-wishing that all the ways she wanted to say thank you could roll off her tongue like they used to. Instead she just hugged her-as tight as she could. Layla's smile told her it was enough.

They didn't talk about him around her. Evangeline refused to bring him up even though her handwriting had improved and she could probably say his name. Her mother would give her cautious glances-asking if anyone had come by her room at night after visiting hours. She'd shake her head and pretend not to know what prompted the question---refusing to suffer through an argument she'd have no say in. She couldn't tell them how much she missed him-explain what it was that made them-them. And so she didn't try.

She just waited.

She woke up around midnight to see him sitting in a chair on the other side of her hospital room. His hair was shorter and he'd lost weight-it made his eyes seem hollow around the edges-darker maybe. He was dressed in black-like a villain in one of those awful slasher movies he loved. Before she would have made a joke about it-asked if he was hiding an axe somewhere. Now she just watched him-too embarrassed by the grunting babble that passed as her voice to speak.

Todd rose from the chair and walked over to her bed-squatting beside her as she propped her weight on one arm. His eyes moved over her face the way it always did-like he was afraid she'd disappear.

The words rose in her throat but she choked them down. She wanted to tell him she was wrong. That he was the only one that got her too. She wanted to say it wasn't his fault-she shouldn't have blamed him for her life falling apart. She wanted another chance to make it right-prove that it was him all along and use all the words she'd avoided when he was around.

Need--want-love...

She picked the most important one. Evangeline lifted her chest higher and grabbed his forearm, griping it so tight her knuckles paled. Todd brushed back her hair with one finger and trailed his hand down her face, swiping her tears as they slid down her cheeks. She didn't want to fuck it up this time-apple/cup or up/down-it all got jumbled in her head but she had to get this right. Her breath came out in a rush and she spoke-her voice hoarse from disuse.

"Stay."

Todd was silent for a moment and then leaned forward to kiss her temple. He rose to his feet and pulled off his jacket-dropping it to the floor as she made room for him in the bed. He climbed inside and pulled her towards him-wrapping his arms around her shoulders as his chin nestled comfortably in her hair. Evangeline let out the breath she'd been holding, buried her face in his chest and closed her eyes. He spoke so low she barely heard him over the rapid pace of his heartbeat.

"Okay."

 

The End










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