Scattered pieces of glass were strewn across the carpeted floor and Beatrice had to be careful. She almost felt sorry for Amy who appeared rather pitiful – twisting her hands together, green dress sweeping the floor as she paced from one end of the settee to the other. Her beautiful face flared by anger yet her mind was apparently hard at work on some plan.

almost… “Mrs. Campbell…”

“There you are…” as if she had called for her a longtime ago.

Part of her said not to question but…”Are you still going to the dinner party?”

The look in Amy’s eyes made Beatrice bite her tongue. “Whatever makes you believe that I’m not going to the Edwards’ party? Take that silly notion out of your mind this instance!”

“Yes ma’am”

“Indeed I’m lagging behind in getting ready…is my dress finished? How is my hair?”

It was as if nothing had occurred. Mrs. Campbell did have a way of pushing aside negative emotions – a survival mechanism Beatrice surmised.

“Your dressed is ready and your hair is perfect madam.”

Servants should never see you at your weakest or they may use it against you later on.

“I’ll judge for myself. Where is the maid?” she asked peering at the broken glass. “Today’s housemaids are so inadequate unlike my mother’s time,” she complained careful to step over the debris.

She spied Henderson leisurely walking down the hallway.

“Henderson, inform the housemaid that she must clean the parlor at once. There are broken pieces of glass on the floor. ”

“Mrs. Campbell, she has already left for the evening.”

“On whose authority?”

“Dr. Campbell’s ma’am...”

Amy snorted. “Well go on and find another. Must I instruct you on how to be in charge of the servants,” then she had a brighter idea, “Better yet clean it yourself.”

“Of course Mrs. Campbell...,” Henderson nodded.

A minuscule victory but she glistened at the prospect of him maybe cutting his hand. Should have broken more items but nevertheless she had greater things to ponder…far greater than getting a sort of reprisal for Henderson’s disloyalty. If Jonathan thought he would send her away and be rid of her so easily then he was mistaken. She hadn’t yet conceived a plan but she could come up with one at the party.

 <<<<<<<<<  

There were moments in one’s life when you have an opportunity to confront past issues and deal with them. He couldn’t give up this occasion to be with Celia and speak with her about serious matters.

“Would you be annoyed if I don’t take you home… as yet?”

“It all depends on where you are taking me.”

“A place where I go to ease my conscious when my mind becomes too distracted...”

“Sounds very intriguing...There is still some light so I don’t mind particularly,” she smiled and he returned that smile.

As the horses trotted onward Celia was deep in thought – had her mind strayed and her heart taken over. After all this while finally some alone with Jonathan. Within that same thought process…What in the world is she thinking? Then her mind concentrated on Jonathan. Poor…poor Jonathan Amy was everything Sonia asserted or else why would he have behaved so angrily towards her. 

“Don’t worry…” as if he discerned some hesitancy, “didn’t I promise to take good care of you.”

She reacted surprised. “You are worried about me?”

“Just trying to understand your sudden change in mood...”

“And here I am trying to understand yours.”

Celia glanced around. Where ever he was taking her civilization would be a rarity…a dwelling here and there but mainly trees and dense overgrowth. She shifted in her seat.

“Again I say that you mustn’t be frightened.”

“Believe me…I’m not.”

At last they came to a long picket fence. He slowed the horses’ pace until they arrived at the gate. Jonathan began yelling for the caretaker to have it opened. A middle-aged black man with a gimp in his step surfaced from a small hut that was built under a sapodilla tree.

Opening the gate he greeted, “Good evening Dr. Campbell.”

“Good evening Mr. Bailey. I would like you to meet Ms. Celia.”

“A pleasure to meet you Ms. Celia...”

“A pleasure as well Mr. Bailey...”

Jonathan climbed off the carriage and assisted Celia in doing the same. She removed her bonnet and left her shawl behind while Jonathan continued his chat with the caretaker. A few feet away the river flowed peacefully. She observed that the grass was well trimmed and a few trees were strategically placed around the extensive property.  Closing her eyes she listened to the sounds of nature.

Time could easily be forgotten being in a place like this. 

“Is this property yours?”

“Yes it belongs to me. I purchased it awhile ago.”

“This is an absolute amazing piece of property!” she exclaimed, “Just feel that breeze and smell that crisp air. Why hasn’t it been developed?”

“Because I acquired it with you in mind…”

A long pause her eyes focused intently at the river. It was perfect for going swimming on those hot May days.

“You don’t believe me?”

“What good does believing do any of us?”

In his hand he had a blanket that was retrieved from the backend of the carriage. He proceeded to spread it out on the ground.

“I thought you were tired from walking.”

“I am.” She spun around.

“Then come… sit beside me.”

Her body tensed as she settled down next to him. “Sometimes it’s good to get away from everything and everyone. This is the perfect place.” He was happy that she approved.

“Jonathan why were you so angry?”

“I don’t have to tell you why I’m so unhappy. If things were different…”

“But things aren’t different,” she reminded, “Why do men get married? Isn’t it because they want to move beyond their father’s authority and assume leadership in their own households.”

“And women…”

“Also to move from underneath their parents’ stern hand… Marry someone that can take care of them and their children.”

“And what of love?”

“Love is for those who are young. It’s not for those who have been hardened by life’s problems.”

What a dim view but in some sense she was right. “I’ll tell you a secret about my wife. She doesn’t want to bear me any children.”

“Surely you’re wrong.”

“My wife cares more about her physique.”

“Jonathan’s it’s a great risk bearing a child.”

“But I’m a doctor!”

“Your being a doctor is not enough and you know this to be true.” Jonathan went into a weird laugh prompting Celia to ask, “What’s so amusing?”

“You defending my wife.”

“Certainly I don’t know her very well but I am a woman,” she scoffed folding her arms.

You certainly are. “I guess we should agree to disagree on this matter,” he chuckled.

“I guess we should,” she responded serious.

 “I envy your husband,” he said lying down, “what’s his name?”

“His name is Joseph.”

“He has a smart, beautiful wife and a son. What is your son’s name?”

“Joshua…” she didn’t look his way.

“A very strong name. I’ll wager that when he’s grown he’ll be as smart as his mother.”

She tried her best to fight back the emotion. “I have no doubt that he’ll be successful in his life,” she responded in a quiet tone. Her hands felt cold and she wanted to get away.

He placed his left hand on her arm. “Have you ever felt alone without being alone?"

“Many times,” she admitted, “but I have Joshua to see me through those dark moods.”

“Whom do I have?”

“Amy.”

He chuckled softly. The conversation changed.

“One day I saw you, a man I assumed is your husband and your son walking together by the courthouse. Seeing your son…humph… I had my suspicions. But having a suspicion and bringing the truth to bear are two different things.”

“Then why Jonathan…why didn’t you ask me there and then and get it over?” Tears started to roll down her cheeks.

“I didn’t know how to approach you...”

“I wanted to be here for you but look at what you are doing to me! I should have stayed far away from you!” She buried her face in the blanket crying uncontrollably.

Jonathan attempted to comfort her but found that it wasn’t possible…she wanted him to go away.

You bastard all you do is hurt the woman you love!

Quickly he arose picked up a stone and hurled it into the river… plunk. He strode a little further away and took up another and then another and then another. It wasn’t his place to ask her. The memory of that day had always remained somewhere in his thoughts.

The mental torture went on for the both of them.

So he had managed to figure it out on his own without her telling him. She recognized that Joshua’s features had made this possible. Everything was like his father, mannerisms, intellectual and that quick-wit. 

Hurt, pain, disappointment things he feared would come to past and the blamed rested squarely on his shoulders. The woman he loved was in tears and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do for her or himself for that matter. The real truth had to come to light eventually but did it mean causing her pain as well.

He had his own pain. After leaving the Bay he was a broken man but covered it well with a will to make a successful career for himself without Mr. Campbell’s influence. Amy was another way to aggravate his father who was persistently goading him into marrying Sara Brodie – a good business partnership he had proclaimed. But not on his last breath could he ever forgive Sara for what she did much less take her into the bonds of holy matrimony…if the relationship with his father wasn’t terrible enough his actions strained it even further. On her deathbed his mother made them promise to be civil to one another. How much longer could he hold true to that promise?

The tears subsided and she regretted appearing so fragile in the presence of man even if it was the man that she adored. Didn’t her mother tell her to never shed tears for any man – shed them for yourself.

She approached him warily and asked, “You’re not angry with me?”

He spun around. “Angry with you?! I could never be angry with you. I’m angry with myself. You don’t deserve to be hurt again,” he said in a low voice.

“Joshua is your son,” she announced quickly.

At first he looked at her strangely then it registered. Jonathan sunk down to his knees… his face ashen. Now that the truth was revealed there was no peace only regret.  Celia rushed to his side and embraced him tightly.

“Forgive me Celia because I don’t know if I can forgive myself,” he whispered, “Forgive me…” he took in a sharp breath and stared at her.

“Jonathan here my words…there is nothing to forgive.”

Her sincere words rang true but part of him vacillated…certainly his failure to act against his father had caused his love and his son to suffer greatly. This fact couldn’t be discounted.

Seeing his doubt she continued, “Remember I didn’t tell you. Even if you knew our lives wouldn’t have been much better.”

“Celia you don’t know that for certain.”

“You weren’t Dr. Campbell only a young man trying to find his place in this world.”

“Your father tore us apart. Many nights I wished him dead for taking you away from me and ruining my life. But I’ve put aside those thoughts and concentrated on our son. God has given me my hope.”

Jonathan nodded his head but kept his face lowered. Then he felt a hand on his cheek. Slowly he lifted his head noticing her pleasant countenance… “We’re still here.”

“I love you.”

Parted lips melded into a lingering kiss that freed pent up desires. Where they were was inconsequential. For now this time belonged to the two of them and the love that could never die.

Hmmm…just a moment longer…a little time more for tongues to become familiar once again and arms to encircle.

Letting go they listened to the sound of their harsh breathing.

“Shhh…,” he placed an index finger on her lips. Celia closed her eyes understanding his purpose. “You don’t need to promise me anything. Your life and happiness is your own.”

“My life revolves around Joshua. It isn’t my own anymore.”

He drew her closer and said, “I can take care of you and our son. You don’t have to work ever again.”

“I don’t know,” she said withdrawing. They  both stood.

“Why can’t you accept my offer?”

“Because that would draw suspicion...”

from her husband… “How about working for one of my friends?” Again she shook her head no. Jonathan sighed.

“What am I to do? I want to help our son if you’ll let me!”

Returning to his arms she kissed him – short, sweet. Her eyes grew dark in the fading light and lovingly he stroked her face. Joseph had what belonged to him – his family.

“Does he treat you well?”

“My husband does his best to take care of us.”

“So there’s nothing that would make you leave him.”

“As if women had that choice….and neither do you for that matter.”

“For now…”

She guessed what his response meant but never pressed it further instead…

“Why are you crying? What did I say?”

“I feel…just that…it’s so unfair!”

“I know my love.”

He kissed her forehead and kept her in his arms until it was time to leave.

 <<<<<<<<<  

Mr. and Mrs. Edwards were gracious hosts greeting guests at the front door before they were ushered to the drawing room by the butler.

“Ah Mrs. Campbell. I must say that you are looking absolutely wonderful this evening.”

Amy blushed and said, “One needs to look their best at this most excellent affair.”

She wore an off the shoulder pink satin evening dress trimmed with ribbon bows. A tasseled white handbag matched her satin gloves. Beatrice had already taken her position amongst the other servants.

“And where is Dr. Campbell this fine evening?” Mrs. Edwards enquired.

“He’s at home resting. My husband is a very dedicated man,” Amy gleamed.

“That he is. On your return home give him our regards,” Mr. Edwards chimed.

“I will be sure to do so.”

 <<<<<<<<<  

Lighted candle chandeliers and bouquets of spring flowers decorated the main rooms. The most influential persons from business to politics were in attendance and everyone sparkled in their best evening attire.

More than eighteen guests were invited and they crowded the drawing room. Amy happened upon Clara; caught sight of Addison and Thomas lurking by the piano and locked venomous stares with the witch Sara.

“Unbelievable that she would dare to challenge me,” Sara rasped.

Her friend Margaret smiled. “Tonight is a perfect opportunity for the two of you to have a chat.” Sara agreed and sipped her wine.

“Why did the Edwards invite certain vagrants,” Amy whispered.

“Oh you mean Sara.”

“She has this strange notion that I stole Jonathan away from her.”

“Sara has always had strange beliefs. Ah there he goes again!” Clara whispered harshly.

“Do you think I have a chance with Clara,” a love-lorn Thomas asked. Clara was rebuffing his glances all evening.

“Do you want me to be completely honest?”

“Yes Addison. I do value your judgment.”

“Find another heart because she doesn’t love you.”

“And what if I’m unable to,” he said in a low voice.

“Then I wish you well my friend.”

The dinner bell sounded.

 <<<<<<<<< 

On the drive home there were no outward displays of affections; no utterances or whispers of deep emotion. Celia was doubtful that things could remain at arms-length between them but they had to try.

“Leave me here. I’ll walk the rest of the way.”

Jonathan didn’t protest but helped her down from the carriage.

“When can I see our son?”

“Maybe tomorrow but I’m not sure. Trust me I won’t keep you from your son.”

“Trust won’t be an issue between us.”

What does he mean? “I’ll be coming in tomorrow.”

“You don’t need to.”

“I insist and this time you can’t…” His eyes expressed silent words. “change my mind…”

He grasped her right palm and kissed it gently. “Please think about my offer. Until tomorrow…”

“Until tomorrow...”

 <<<<<<<<<  

Dinner was a magnificent affair consisting of soups, fresh breads, baked fish, roasted beef, pork or chicken, vegetables and desserts all accompanied with the finest French wines. The Edwards were also effective in keeping particular guests away from each other at the dining room table. Beatrice assisted her mistress throughout the meal.

Soon the guest proceeded in their own directions – some ladies went to the drawing room, the men joined Mr. Edwards in the study, while others roamed the huge garden. They had some time to mingle before the evening’s entertainment would begin.

Sara spied Amy and Clara wandering the garden and decided to track their movements.

“This is an amazing party and the night is still young.”

“The Edwards have outdone themselves.”

“I’m going inside to speak with John (her choice among the suitors). Are you coming along?”

“No but please tell my maid Beatrice to come outside.”

“I will.”

Amy alone…now was the perfect time. Conveniently Sara bumped into her and didn’t acknowledge the offense.

“I beg your pardon Sara Brodie,” Amy steamed.

“Was the troll referring to me?” Sara and Margaret shared a giggle.

“Shows your dimwittedness…”

“Humph…a pity that Jonathan wishes to remain at home…cuddling his books.”

Amy was quick to retaliate. “Did you lose your husband along the way? Forgive me Gregory pales in comparison to my Jonathan.”

“I remember losing my true husband some time ago to a slender vixen.”

“Unhealthy to have regrets over things that were never yours in the first place.”

“She considers her husband a thing,” Margaret offered.

“What business is it of yours?” She addressed her new opponent.

“Outsiders stealing our few good men is my business.”

“The women of the Bay seem unable to hold on to them.”

“Jonathan was mine!”

Amy laughed. “Wishing for things and those things actually coming to past is a waste of energy. See how you disgrace yourself.”

“I don’t care! It would be better to snip off one of those pretty curls of yours.”

“I dare you to try wench!”

Sara smacked her hard and Amy retaliated by lounging at her. They both fell hard to the ground scratching and clawing at each other with enough insults thrown in between. Margaret was unimpressed with her friend’s efforts and looked rather bored.

The commotion was getting quite loud and Mrs. Edwards hearing of the vexing occurrence ran out to put an end to the dispute

“Both of you should be very ashamed of this unladylike behavior.”

“Sara is the one who started it all!” Amy cried.

“It doesn’t matter. You’ll share the blame equally.”

“Jennings, escort them off my property immediately! Don’t be expecting another invitation anytime soon if ever!”

Mrs. Edwards gathered her bearings and returned to her guests. It was time for the real entertainment to begin.

<<<<<<<<<  

No words of greeting Celia headed to her room and pulled the curtain.

“Something wrong with my child. Lydia hold Joshua.”

Abigail found her curled up in bed hugging the pillow.

“Celia what wrong?”

“Nothing mama…”

“You can tell me anything.” She sat beside her and Celia turned into her arms for comfort.

“Mama I need to beg forgiveness but I don’t regret being with him,” she said quietly. “You told me not to cry for any man but I cried for him.”

“You were with Jonathan?” …concern in her voice.

“Kissing, holding each other…” He couldn’t believe her ears but this wasn’t the moment for a stern lecture. “He knows that Joshua is his son.”

“Hiyah aye Lord help us!”

“Celia I told you this would happen!”

“Lydia I told you to watch Joshua not listen in on we conversation. Give Celia the baby.” Lydia hesitated. “I say give her the child now and don’t say another word.”

“What ah do now?” she asked caressing Joshua who was half asleep.

“It all up to you. We could offer advice but it up to you.”

“I can take care of you and our son. You don’t have to work ever again.”

There wasn’t anything wrong with Jonathan’s proposal. Instead of dismissing it she should have been accepting it…gladly. Why did I say no?   

<<<<<<<<<  

Returning home Jonathan refused his dinner and retired to bed. His head ached and it wasn’t because of any drug inducement – every other thought was of Celia and their son. Didn’t she want her life to be easier? Why was she so quick to refuse his offer?

DAMN! DAMN! DAMN!

Third time in his life that he felt he was unable to change the outcome of things. At least he was getting rid of one complication…that manipulative wife of his but a knock at his door would say otherwise.