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Story Notes:

Story notes- I know a lot of fans and viewers were turned off by the unfairness of Gwen being banished. I saw it as an opportunity for Gwen's character that the Merlin could not take advantage and decided to write The Exile. The focus of the story is Guinevere and how she develops and grows as woman alone in the world. Gwen will learn she is smarter, stronger and more resilent then she ever imagined.

The men do appear however the early focus is almost entirely on Guinevere and her time outside of Camelot.

Artwork by my younger sis: http://crystalsavage.blogspot.com/

 





Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.


 The Exile

-Guinevere Alone –

  Chapter One1
 
 
 
              Sunlight beamed down through the receding morning mist. Already the people of Camelot's capital city, former friends were going about their routines. Black smoke puffed from the chimney of the smithy, Grif the butcher drug a squealing pig into his shop, and the fragrance of fresh bread drifted through the Lowtown. On any other morning she might have treated herself to a small loaf of bread and fresh butter, waved to Grif or stopped to speak with Jeordi the head black smith. On any other morning she might have visited these friends and found herself welcome. On this morning though they must –by law- turn her out or risk sharing her banishment, all hands were against her now.

              Enid whom she had often thought of as a sister merely stood in the door of her cottage watching her slow steady progress up the street. When Guinevere drew near the woman's home Enid whispered something in her daughter's ear and ducked into her home pulling her child with her. Gwen spared a glance for the wooden door shut tight against her and told herself to keep going.

              It was the same with everyone she saw. No one met her eyes, no smiles encouraged her. Even Merlin with whom she had shared so much could only look upon with melancholy eyes as grey as the morning mist. Still there was one thing to be grateful for. The banishment had happened quickly and though rumors had already begun to spread there were very few people out and about. She'd seen unlucky felons detained three, four, five days before sentencing and banishment, allowing time enough for the news to saturate the populace. In those cases the unlucky outcast found the simple act of exiting the Lowtown a circus-like ordeal of
humiliation at the hands of their former friends and countrymen. Yet another mercy Arthur had shown her.
              Gwen halted. How had she come to the walls encircling the Lowtown so quickly? She knew she should be moving forward, but every part of her wanted turn and run back to him. To throw herself at his feet and beg –yes beg- him to forgive, not force her away from him, she'd waited so long. Perhaps the speed of her sentencing and expulsion was no mercy after all. If people had been throwing things at her, calling her adulteress and worse; passing under the white stone archway would have been a relief. As it was Gwen felt she might stand forever at that arch.

              "Hullloo Gwen!"

              Guinevere peered down the road from Camelot. It was one of the older roman roads wide enough for three men to walk abreast, it would make at least part of her journey easier. It was what or rather who stood beside the road that held her attention; a tall, broad shoulder figure stood waving. In her ideal world Guinevere would have avoided anyone that knew her or her shame. Merlin had not approached her so she had not approached him.  Gwaine it seemed would not be so easily avoided. She took a deep breath and left her home behind.
 
                  "Gwaine?" She could manage no more than his name for greeting.

                  "My lady Guinevere."

                  "Don't call me that." She admonished him.

                  "I've always called you that and I always will."

                  Her only reply was to sigh and purse her lips.

                  "I've come to see you off." Gwaine caught her chin with between his thumb and forefinger.

                  "Thank you."

                  "I'll walk with you for a-ways.  Save your strength and let me take this for a bit."

                  Guinevere let him take the cart without argument.

                  "Any thoughts on where you'll be going?"

                  "The only place I know is Ealdor?"

                  "Cenred's lands." Gwaine frowned, "There's no King there now. It could be dangerous. "

                  "Merlin's mother Hunith lives there, I think if things were going badly they would have sent word."

                  "More than likely you are correct, but you should have options."

                  "You offer a suggestion?"

                 "You could head to Caerleon. Queen Annis is a fair ruler if her husband was not, their lands are prosperous. You should be able to find work there. You could also go to Wyledon. I lived there for a time it is exciting place. It borders Caerleon and is near the sea."
              Guinevere nodded for her reply.

              "If you do go to Wyledon find Adras of the Five Hands. He's a friend heads a little group. They make a good living, they are fair to women and you can learn a lot."

              Guinevere couldn't help, but wonder what this group did.

              "Take this." He handed her simple gold chain with an unfamiliar flower. "Give it to Adras. He'll know I sent you."

              Guinevere took the chain. She knew enough about Gwaine's past to know that she might not want to meet with his friends, but you never knew when a recommendation might come in handy.

              "Now I've got a few other farewell gifts for you. This is from the staff." He handed her a leather satchel. Inside it Guinevere found a purse heavy with coppers, a meal for her lunch, the cap Enid had been knitting for her daughter -It would actually match her travel cape perfectly-,a  belt knife that Elyan had made for himself years ago and most importantly two envelopes that could only be letters of recommendation.  Guinevere felt her throat tighten and the start of tears in her eyes.

              "Hey this is supposed to make you feel better."

              "It is." She managed the two words somehow. "I just wasn't expecting such generosity."

              "Guinevere you've got a lot of people here that love you in spite of everything. You're not the first person to make a mistake."

              She sniffed and swallowed this fresh well of tears at his kind words.

              "Thank you Gwaine. Tell them I won't forget this. That their kindness means more to me than anything else they could have done. Tell Elyan I love him and I hope we meet again."

              "I'll tell them Guinevere. I've got to start back soon otherwise I'll be missed."

              She nodded and was surprised when he pulled her into a quick rough hug.

              "Be careful Gwen and write us when you are settled. We all want to know that you're safe. Even he'll want to know."

              She didn't say anything to that just nodded and took the handle of the cart. She had to get going if she were going to reach Longstead by nightfall.  Somehow she found her steps a little lighter now.
 
             ****************************************


                                          
              The road away from Camelot led into the woods and before long the palace, its walls, the hill upon which it sat, and the little town huddled next to it were all hidden from her view. Great wide tree trunks were all around her and little scrubby trees and bushes dotted the forest floor. Under normal circumstances she would have found the day a pleasant one. It was neither hot nor cold, and the sun shone sweetly through the trees, and bumble bees buzzed in and out of early spring flowers. Birds sang to each other of things only they knew, but as man had done for centuries she imagined what they might sing to one another about and the ground was easy beneath her feet.

              Even with the pleasantness of the day Gwen did not make the time that she had hoped, she'd gotten soft.  Before becoming Morgana's maid she and her father had walked the 40 miles to Longstead to pay a visit to Aunt Mary and Uncle John and they'd completed the journey before sundown. She'd only made half that time today. Soon the sun would begin its nighttime descent and she needed to be off the road before then. The would-be Queen began looking for someplace to sleep. She did not want to be on the road after sundown, not with the cart. She'd gotten soft and stupid. Gwen found a little pocket in the woods off the side of the road thick with foliage. Pleased with this she got the things she needed from it she needed and pushed the cart into the pocket, hidden thus no one would see it from the road. She wasn't afraid to sleep in the woods at night she knew enough to stay off game trails, bandit trails, and dispose of her garbage away from her camp, not sleep in animal dens, and avoid strangers. Since it was late spring she didn't bother with a fire, most animal predators were only interested in man during the winter months. Guinevere ate a cold and silent evening meal, cleaned her utensils and settled her back against the trunk of a great tree.
She pulled her blanket snug round her shoulders and fished the ring Arthur had given her out. He'd not asked for it back and she could not bear to return it to him. She did not wear it on her fingers, but instead on a simple leather thong round her neck. Turning her gaze up to the nighttime starts she prayed quickly and quietly and tucked her head down to sleep.
                                                         
              *************************
 
             

              Guinevere rose as the first hints of false dawn began coloring the sky a fair grey. Sleep had not come easily that night and when it had there had been dreams -unbearable things- from which she forced herself awake. Dreams she refused to think of as she prepared breakfast, broke camp and got on the road with first light of true sunrise.   As the day drew on she began see other travelers and Gwen put her hood up. She could not bear to see or speak to anyone.

              She drew near to Longstead just after her noon meal and made a camp about a mile from the village. The laws were very clear she could only seek shelter with the coming of night and she could not remain in any town, village or city of Camelot beyond sunrise to do so would invoke death sentence. Since she was traveling on foot she had a full twenty days to leave the borders of Camelot. It was her plan to cross into Ealdor before that limit lapsed. She'd give Arthur no reason to order her death; she'd not have that on his conscious. She looked again at the sky dotted with summer clouds. She needed something to occupy her time for the next few hours. Gwen got out her needlepoint recalling her mother's words: "You'll never go hungry as long as you can embroider."  She leaned her back against the trunk of a tree and began. Her plan was to embellish kerchiefs for noblemen and women especially the women to give them as tokens to their beloved.  Gwen found her fingers clumsy and awkward as she tried to work and soon she gave up on the embroidery and drifted into her first real sleep in two days.
 
              The cottage was a simple sturdy structure of rough stone and a thatched roof. Gwen could already feel the warmth of its hearth and here she thought she might even find welcome. Still it was with some trepidation that she knocked on her Aunt and Uncle's door.

              "What do you want so late in the night?" Her stomach twisted as she heard the annoyance in her Aunt's voice.
The door was pulled open and she watched emotions play across Mary's face, annoyance first, then confusion and finally concern- grave concern. She must look like hell.

              "Gwen? Come in dear girl. What could possibly be wrong?"  Mary pulled her into a tight hug and with a sigh she let herself sink into the older woman's girth. "What's happened?  John come tie up Gwen's cart. Let me get you something to eat."
She let Mary take charge of her. Let the older woman fix her a bowl of stew and brown bread while her Uncle John took care of her things.
              "What's happened Gwen? Do you want to talk about it?"

              Gwen felt an involuntary shudder at the thought of it.

              "Please don't ask me to Auntie Mary. I only ask that you let me sleep here tonight?"

               Mary pursed her lips and Gwen thought of her mother, it could be hard to see her Aunts.

              "If you insists, but-"

              "Just give me a blanket by the fire. I'll be gone at first light and if you ask me no questions and no trouble can come to you." Those words communicated all that Mary needed to know

              The older woman's frown deepened and she looked as if she were going to say something, but stopped.
              "Are you very tired?"
              "Actually, no I spent much of the day asleep."

             "Then John and I will sit up with you for a bit and we can tell you stories about your pa and grandmam and grandsire  there's some we haven't told you." Mary's hand closed round her own "Who knows when we shall meet again?"
              "Thank you Auntie."
 
              ***********************************
 
              When Arthur had pronounced her banishment she had not believed she would laugh again, but here she sat round a fire laughing.
               "I wish that we could have your cousins over tonight, but only Aaron and his boys are close and they're all down with the chicken pox. Where's your brother?" Uncle John asked.

              Gwen only looked at her aunt helplessly.

              "Thinks 'cause he's got himself knighted he's too good to help his family." John's voice was heavy with scorn.

              "Uncle John it's not like that. He has his oath-"

              "-Oath be hanged he could take a few days and see his sister safe. He wouldn't have that knight's position if it weren't for you."

              "Yes and then he'd be in trouble too." John and Mary exchanged a look and she realized she'd told them more than intended.  "I'm tired." Gwen yawned and they exchanged another look.

             "Very well," John said it. "Goodnight my Gwennie."

             She smiled at the use of her childhood nickname and accepted goodnight hugs before lying down on a pallet before the fire. Gwen did not let herself sleep as deeply as she'd planned. Her Uncle's words made one thing clear to her. He would not let her go on the road by herself and as much as she might have enjoyed his company she could not let him endanger himself or his household. Somehow she rose before dawn and dressed in silence. Still she could not leave without so much as a farewell. She wrote them a simple note apologizing and bidding them not worry for her or hate or when they learned of the shame she'd brought on her family.
 
            *******************************
 
          The guardsmen's eye's scanned the cell certain he'd seen it earlier that day when they'd brought Guinevere to the King for sentencing. He hadn't had time to grab it just then, but he'd promised himself he'd come back for it. After a moment's search the guardsmen found it in the corner farthest from the door.

            It was beautiful, a gleaming silver that seemed to glow as no metal he'd seen before. He knew it was supposed to go either to the King or Guinevere's family, but he doubted the King would be interested in anything from the adulteress and she was not at all close to her brother. He studied the delicately carved metal and thought of Janet, the pretty kitchen maid he'd been courting she would love something like this.

          His plan was to propose tonight it would make the perfect gift.
 
                                                                                                                  
                                                                                                                                                                -End Chapter 1





Chapter End Notes:

Chapter  notes- John and Mary appeared in Lamia episode 4x8 and while they may not look as if they'd be related to Gwen, I think they could be. I decided that Guinevere's grandmother was an Ashante trader and came to Camelot along the silk road. She is referenced in this story occasionally and I do plan for her to appear in other Merlin fanfic.







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Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.