We crossed the South Carolina/Georgia Line hours ago, and the journey seemed to go anywhere. More empty towns, overgrown roads, and abandoned signs, displayed only the memories of a civilized North America. Most of the soldiers took this time to catch up on much needed sleep, while Michael, Norris, and I were the only passengers that stayed up. Once in a while I glanced at my companion, but his face kept forward, eyes in a blank stare. While Michael had checked out, Sgt. Norris hummed out tunes from Bach, Beethoven, Tchaikovsky, and Stravinsky. Every so often, his fingertips would tap lightly against the driver’s seat in the style of a MET composer at his podium during an aria. I became lost in his crazed behavior, lost in the rhythm he imagined and brought to life; I became lost in his dream.

It wasn’t until the van started along an ascending road, did I pay attention to the outside world. No longer were we amongst the mundane countryside, but now we were swallowed, belly deep, in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Georgia. Before long, the convoy emerged through a series of dark tunnels carved out of the gray limestone, and into piercing, white sunlight.

My eyes shut quickly, and my face absorbed as much of the rays the tinted windows would allow. Slowly, I raised my eyes and exposed myself to the brightness. While fall approached, it seemed the sun craved to hold on to the life it kissed through summer, its rays spread like fingers across the lush green, red and brown trees, while highlighted a background of  blue rolling hills. It was rare to see such life right before death from anything…this was such untainted beauty that never changed in spite of the war. This must be what Samantha talked about…the freedom.

“Are we at the cabin?” Michael questioned with such force. He moved forward to get a better look out the front window, before he sat back and looked around.

“I never knew this place really existed…” I answered and shrugged, but Norris chuckled.

“Such a lovely treasure right under your nose, you’re innocence is charming, Celeste. “I stiffened under his comment and dismissed everyone by looking out the window.  The convoy stayed in their tight formation, while I wondered if Jasper and I would have been able to climb this hill. I continued to watch as we soared over the wooded area and wondered what waited at the top.

Soon the slope vanished and the road evened out. The trees spread apart, created more room for my eyes to take in. I watched in astonishment as a family of deer stood on alert in the distance, and few furry animals crossed our path. It was simple breathtaking, but nerves lingered in my gut.

Our van made a sharp right turn through a small roadway and stopped about fifty yards down. The tree lined driveway opened to a large circle way with a tiny cabin behind it. Immediately, I let my eyes take in the vision of my dreams and underwhelmed, I was the first to order the door unlocked. Instantly, Norris climbed out and offered me help, but my impatience had my foot on the ground before he could turn around. My attention went immediately to the structure.

Basic in design, the log cabin’s two front window displayed closed outdated drapes and damaged window sills. The small porch was battered and broken, while the patched roof missed more than a couple of shingles. How shocked I was over the terrain, the real surprise came from disappointment. “This isn’t it. Can’t be…” I repeated, walked toward the side of the house.

Again, I eyed the cabin from its left side and noticed the size didn’t increase; a perfect little box, on the side of a cliff. With no back space, it floated over a lush view of the blue valley; this place was too small. I turned to Norris, raged boiled and demanded he explain this. “You lied! You promised a safe haven, a place where the rebels hid, and this cabin is barely able to sustain Michael and I!” Betrayed, I singled out my companion as he slowly tucked his hands under his arm, close to his gun hoister.

Anger drove my feet further away from the group and closer to the view. I passed a couple of soldiers who lounged against trees, content with the environment. My eyes connected with Norris’ right hand man, the dark haired boy. “What?” I snapped.

“You don’t even know…” he spat back, then looked toward the cabin wall. I followed his gaze and discovered the source of his attention. A small black camera placed underneath the roof aimed right at me. I moved to the left, it followed.  I moved back, and again it was there. Immediately, I turned toward him for answers and he gestured behind me.

“There’s nothing be a view,” I said, and looked toward the landscape for emphasis.

“It’s what’s below that count,” he added and his hand reached out to the small of my back. He lead me closer to the back of the house, where only two feet of space was left before the drop off. Desperate, I looked down, and then I saw the rocks. Steps.  Small rock formations stood out from the face of the cliff, deliberately placed and angled for optimum advantage.

“Are those…stairs?” I whispered.

“Yes. They led to the Haven,” he answered with a gentle smile.

“Well, then what is this?” I asked, referred back to the cabin.

“A decoy; obviously a successful one,” Norris added suddenly, Michael right on his heels.  

While five guys stayed back to hide the vans amongst the scenery, the Sgt. was the first to step on the rocks, angled himself so his back was to the wall and his face toward the view. “Come, your presence must be greatly anticipated,” he said to me, before quickly retreating downward.

One by one, the men took the stairs with ease and vanished below. At last it was my turn, so I applied a brave face and took my first step, but the rocks shock under my weight. Terrified, I backed away, right into a figure. “Don’t concentrate on the movement; it does it to us all. Just keep going…” the sweet sound of advice came from the same soldier. What was once midnight black hair, now shined a dark shade of whiskey under the sun’s rays. I stared at the soldier, tried to figure out where I knew him, and how could I forget him. “Take another step, he’s not going to let you fall.” Emerald eyes looked passed my head and focused on the only man to stop midway down. My head swung to Michael, whose blues watched with intensity, however my hesitation caused more trouble than I thought.

“Come on little bird, spread those wings,” Norris yelled for below and fire ignited within. My skin crawled, while I ached to throw him over the cliff. I came here for one reason, and that had nothing to do with his bullshit. However, I bit my lip and moved forward.

With motivation, I sped down the stone stairs, to land in an outdoor garden. Its size spanned the whole floor plan of the cabin, with greenery and lush vegetables in almost every corner. A small white rock pathway weaved around the space, created an appropriate stepping stone through the fertile land. I never saw such an effective Eco space before, even rain buckets were scattered around.

“We have four more, all much bigger,” the familiar soldier whispered quickly, then left to stand by the Sgt.’s side. He left me stuck on stupid as I tried to comprehend the gravity of what my eyes witnessed. Though Norris seemed like he was fool of shit, the man was right so far…

“Look up,” and that husky voice was back. I didn’t have to look far to meet Michael’s eyes, since he stood right next me, and I eased into his closeness. I followed his gaze to the opened ceiling, noticed the cabin sat right above, its floor boards missing. Where black patches lined the ceiling, I noticed they were actually tinted windows. The blue sky was now a dark purple, and the clouds a vibrant lavender.

“This is amazing…” I whispered only for his ears, and dropped my eyes back toward the garden. So much light, hit every corner, illuminated the natural colors. I walked forward and approached a pepper plant. From tiny stems, robust yellow, orange, and red bell peppers sat. I looked amongst its neighbors and observed more of the plants; stacks and stacks grew on top of each other, each fought for more nutrients. “How…? How is this place a secret?” I called out to Norris and at the same time I realized we had new comers.

Fully erect now, I looked into eyes that called forth months of nightmares, eyes so familiar that for a second I believed they belonged to my dear friend.

“Karen, allow me to introduce you to Charles Darwin and Amelia Earheart,” Norris announced, all humor gone, however the strawberry blonde woman chuckled. This was a face I knew, a promised face at the end of the journey. Two years it took, but somehow I made it.

“Very original, but I’m all too familiar with your birth name,” she smiled at me and stepped forward, her arms wide. However, I refused to move, couldn’t take one more step.  

A strange feeling suddenly drowned me; Regret. As I looked at her, the more I felt it. I shouldn’t be here, not when her daughter didn’t make it. All at once, excuses attacked my mental reasoning, and yet, all I uttered was worry about for her sterile white lab coat. “I can’t hug you, I’m disgusting.” I denied, but Karen would have none of it.

“My, dear…there is nothing more to me right now, than wearing the burden of your travels, even if it’s only the dirt. You were Sam’s….” she began, but even her voice haunted me.

“STOP!” Instantly, I erupted and yelled. All sense left me and I felt the urge to vomit. “Stop, please…don’t treat me with kindness when you have no idea what I had to do…what she went through…” I begged, but Karen was the one to overcome, one step at a time.

The hum of silence rose against the backdrop of the wild. Everyone, every solider, every worker, Michael, and even Norris, froze as the woman crossed the space and broke down all my barriers. Before I knew it, tears raced down my dirt stained face, their salty kisses caressed my lips, yet added brine to the wounds of my heart.

I watch in devastation as Karen stopped a foot away for me, barefaced and watered eye. I choked off her sweet scent of honey, a smell too precious for anyone to wear during these times. She was perfect, as I remembered from before the war; slowly she became everything I truly missed, my own mother.

“Celeste, darling…we are all here because of our sacrifices, and if my daughter is in a better place, than I shall bear that weight for you as well. My Sammie is not here because she knows that there are people who need me more. You and Samantha are one in the same through my eyes.”

And her soft arms wrapped around me; I collapsed.

Over and over, my sobs became even harder for me to understand, but the pain bled through my cries. Karen wrapped her tiny limbs tighter, stronger than anyone has and brought us down to the ground. Our heads on each other’s shoulders, her hands soothed my back. She, too, cried. Together, we bounded ourselves by heartache, sorrow, despair, and unexpected liberation. “I have relief knowing that you are here with us, that those who shared much with her will now share much with me. Now, sleep, dear…just give in.”

***

Beep…Beep…Beep...Beep.Beep.Beep. BEEP. BEEP…BBBEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPP!

I jolted up from the blaring sound of my alarm clock and rubbed my wrist to disengage, only to find leather binds around my wrist. Eyes wide, I searched through a dim red glow for my wrist. My arms felt heavy, way too dense to be attach to my body. I pulled my right wrist, looked for a shadow but I saw double. Instantly, I looked down at the shirt I wore, or lack of. My clothes were replaced with a dotted hospital gown and a thin white blanket hid missing pants.

The beeping sound wasn’t from my alarm; I looked at the heart monitor machine. A sophisticated device showed lines that jumped off the screen in both directions, as my heart raced against my ribcage. I tried to focus on anything else in the dark room, but my dilated eye were disoriented, my vision blurred. Focused on one of the two visions of a call button right within reach of my fingers, I alternated pressing both rapidly; I was hyperventilating.

As the seconds increased, turned to minutes, my voice echoed off the walls. The nightmares I kept at bay crawled out the corners, rained from the ceilings; heavy breaths, which was my own, now, copied those of the Z’s. My fingernails clawed against the restraints…my back rose off the bed…my thoughts raced.  Why was I alone? How did I get into a hospital? Why did I feel pressure sore through my veins? When did the IV liquid become cool? Why are my eyelids heavier? Who… turned… off… the… beeping? No…more…nightmares…no…more…dreams…just…blackness…just…sleep.