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Author's Chapter Notes:

Take a peek inside of Sebastian's mind.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Jogging cleared his head. He didn’t have to think when he was jogging. Every civilized thought and habit was pushed inside for pure instinct and primal urges. Anger didn’t do justice to the emotions that swirled inside of him like a hurricane. Fury didn’t do much either.


That was a more satisfying word.

Sebastian felt destructive. He wanted to wrap his hands around someone’s neck and feel the snap of bones under the pressure. Willow’s mere presence reduced him to a physical state of crumbling self-control and discipline. The scent of another male’s cologne clinging to her flesh was what nearly pushed him over the edge.

Destructive. Animalistic.

He jogged through the cold streets of the city with a destination in mind.

Blood. Bone. Blood. Bone.

After twenty blocks of jogging, he slipped into a darkened alleyway and approached a backdoor that was thoroughly illuminated with a bright light. There was a surveillance camera with a blinking red light. He looked up at it and the backdoor made a buzzing sound as it unlocked.

He opened the door and entered the building. The hallway was painfully bright and at the end of it was an elevator. No need pressing ‘up’ as the elevator door opened to reveal a man who was the same height as Sebastian and twice as burly. Jasper was his name. Well, it wasn’t his real name, but then again Sebastian wasn’t his real name either. They were two people pretending. It was all a part of the life they chose.

The elevator door shut behind him as he entered.

“You’re late,” Jasper growled.

He knew he was late. He didn’t expect the object of obsession to come to him crying and angry in the middle of a cold December night. He knew exactly how to deal with her when he returned home. Sebastian said nothing as he stared straight ahead, listening to the loud hum of the elevator as it moved up the floors of the building. The elevator dinged as it stopped at the top floor. When the doors parted, he left Jasper behind.

Two bodyguards stationed outside of his destination greeted him with a rough and thorough pat down. If only they knew who they were dealing with. “Don’t forget to slip a few dollars into my thong,” he said, half-amused and half-irritated.

“Fuck you, Sebastian,” one of the bodyguards growled before he nodded to the other bodyguard as a signal. Both of them stopped their search and backed off.

Sebastian opened the door that led into a familiar office.

“You’re late.”

“So I’ve been told,” Sebastian said as he shut the door behind him.

“I don’t like to be kept waiting.”

Sebastian sat down in an empty chair on the other side of the massive polished wooden desk. “It won’t happen again,” Sebastian assured.

The owner of the voice was a platinum blonde woman in her fifties named Juliette. She rose from her cushioned office chair and rounded the desk. She sat down across Sebastian’s lap like she was an eager child with a Christmas list and he was Santa Claus. Her smile was just as big too.

“I hope it doesn’t,” she said. “I think of you as a son, Nathaniel.”

Nathaniel was his real name. The name few people knew of and those that did were too afraid to utter it past their lips in fear of what he would do to them. Nathaniel was a token of the past. A past he didn’t want to be reminded of. She used it freely like a piece of bait to provoke him. She leaned in to kiss him tenderly. Her tongue slid into his mouth, curling around his tongue. He remained still. He was used to this. He was used to her. As usual, he was unmoved by her seduction.

“Is that how you kiss your sons,” he queried, lifting an eyebrow when she pulled away from him. She stood up from his lap and placed the palm of her hand against his crotch, giving his limp cock a suggestive squeeze.

“In my wet dreams,” she admitted as she backed away and sat down at the edge of the desk, crossing one slender leg over the other. “Then again if I do recall, I’m would definitely be an upgrade from your sorry excuse of a mother. And I fucked your father once upon a time.”

He narrowed his eyes at the mention of his parents, but said nothing. Another piece of bait to provoke him.

She grabbed a thick file from her desk and plopped it onto his lap. “That’s your next clean up. This case is a little special.”

Sebastian didn’t bother looking through the file yet. “Why?”

“This client has a thing for theatrics. He wants to watch you put the target’s head on a platter in a literal sense,” she said with an uncaring shrug. “You discard the rest of the poor bastard however you choose.”

“I’m not a butcher. You have thirteen others that are more suitable for this mission,” Sebastian said.

Juliette tapped her index finger onto her chin with a thoughtful expression on her face. “That’s true, but I want you to do it. Everyone needs a little blood bath to excite the taste buds. Unless, you’re getting too soft?”

“I’m not getting soft.”

“I don’t know, Nathaniel. I remember a time when you did what you were told with no questions asked. Do you need to take a trip down memory lane? Do you remember how I found you as a homeless gutter rat and took you in,” Juliette said as she slipped from her desk and rounded the seat he sat in, tracing her finger along the broad length of his shoulders. She then leaned in. “And you’re wrong,” she whispered. “You are a butcher. I’ve seen it with my own two eyes. Remember those horrible things you did to those poor bastards that took everything from you?”

Blood. Bone. Blood. Bone.

He could almost smell.

“I remember you didn’t take me in by choice, he forced you to. I also remember fucking you on that very desk and you enjoying it,” he stated calmly. “My how time as changed.”

Juliette smirked. “He did force me to, but don’t think you’re untouchable because you’re his son. He put you under my command because you owe him. And you’re right. I did enjoy it very much. Must be a familial trait.”

He was done playing her little game. “Will that be all?”

“So eager to leave,” Juliette pouted as she returned back to her desk and sat down on the edge of it. “Is there someone waiting for you to return home? Maybe that cute black girl?”

His eye twitched, but he said nothing.

She chuckled softly. “You thought I didn’t know about her, Nathaniel. You thought you could keep her a secret from me? Tsk, tsk. You know me better than that. I have to say though. You never fucked me like that. I’m actually little jealous.”

 “Leave her out of this, Juliette.”

Juliette gave him a mocked look of surprise. “I am leaving her out of this. However, it concerns me as your superior that she’s preventing you from doing your job. I’ll even go as far to say that she’s the reason why you were late.”

“You won’t touch her.”

“I won’t touch her if you do your job, but I will have to say it’s a little difficult watching her touch you. Upon a time, you were mine and in a way, you still are mine. You know I have trouble sharing,” she sighed.

“Don’t say predictable things like that. It makes you sound pathetic,” Sebastian said.

Juliette threw her head back and laughed. “Predictable? Pathetic? Name-calling isn’t very becoming of you, Sebastian. Do you think I’d be predictable or pathetic if I sent someone to her house while she’s sleeping peacefully in her little bed to beat her, fuck her, and choke her until she’s dead?”

Once more, he said nothing. Sebastian picked his battles wisely even though a storm of destructiveness brewed deep inside of him at her threat. He clenched his fists tightly.

“I thought so,” she said, a satisfied look washed over her face. Sebastian tightened his jaw as a way to restrain himself and grabbed the file off of his lap before rising from his seat. He walked back over to the door, wanting to take his leave. However, Juliette’s voice stopped him in his tracks.

“Before you go back to her, tell me who do you belong to?”

Sebastian gripped the door knob lightly as he heard the request.

“You, Juliette. I belong to you.”


After the twenty-block jog back to his warehouse home, he closed the creaky rusted door behind him. His mind was only concentrated on one goal: find Willow. Just as he was about go to his black metal staircase, he saw something move from the corner of his eyes in the kitchen. He turned his head. There she stood with a cup of water in her hand, watching him. Sebastian was beginning to understand her nature. If he stalked over to her like he wanted to then she would most likely run off like a prey would when they catch sight of their predator—the orchestrator of their inevitable end. So he walked entered the open concept kitchen in slow concise steps and approached her. She looked at him in what appeared to be fear and anticipation.

He raked his eyes down her figure wrapped in black satin. He loved the way it hugged her curves. If only she had worn it just for him, but he could smell that bastard’s cologne all over her. So it had to go. It had to be destroyed. Before he lost it. Before he lost control. She placed the cup of water onto the kitchen island she stood near and turned around, pushing her hair aside to reveal the dress’s zipper.

She looked over her shoulder at him. “Take it off.”

He didn’t need to be told twice. He yanked the zipper down, but used force to rip the dress to the hemline. He felt like a caveman—an animal or a monster—resorting to primal instincts to retrieve what he believed he needed to survive. Willow drove him to this point. Dealing with Juliette pushed him over the edge.

Destroy. Protect. Destroy. Protect.

He took off the ruined dress and let it drift to the floor. She turned around to face him. While she was here, she must have wiped the ruined makeup off of her face. She rose to the tips of her toes and kissed his lips tenderly. So tender it reminded him how innocent she was. How pure she was. How tainted he was. How much of a monster he was. But he had to have her. He had to have a slither of her light.

Sebastian scooped her up into his arms and carried her out of the kitchen, across the first floor, and up the towering metal staircase. He placed her onto his bed—where she belonged. He followed her onto it and laid beside her, watching her shudder softly as he traced his cold fingers across her warm soft stomach in lazy circles.

“That was seventy dollars wasted,” she said softly.

 “I told you I’d rip it off of you when I came back.”

It was amazing how one moment he wanted to devour her whole and all he wanted to do was lie beside her until the sun came up. He could see the question in her eyes, burning a hole into him—waiting to be asked. Waiting to be answered.

“Sebastian, where did you go?”

“You know I can’t tell you that.”

Willow bit down onto her bottom lip for a moment. “Lie to me then and tell me something I want to hear.”

“I refuse to lie to you.”

“It’s better than not telling me anything at all.”

Sebastian withdrew his hand and used it to scratch his dark beard. He had a thoughtful expression on his face while he looked at her carefully. A conflict swirled inside of him. To tell the truth and watch her run away from him forever or lie to keep her close to him where she belonged.

“Do you want to know where I went?”

Willow slowly nodded her head and softly cooed, “Yes, I do.”

“I went to go see an old friend.”

It was a half-truth. Once upon a time, Juliette was a friend. Once upon a time, she was more than a friend. Now she was turning into a threat, a liability.

“Did you fuck her?”

Sebastian cocked his head to the side. “What makes you think it was a ‘her’?”

“I can smell perfume all of you. It’s the same kind my mother wears.”

“And I can smell his cologne on you,” he countered.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “The guy I was going to go home with was one of Simon’s college buddies. They were for a bachelor party. They decided to play a game of ‘catch the pig’ and because Simon knew me, he let them. He was going to let them use me.”

Willow sat up from the bed and closed her eyes, covering her hands over her face. Her shoulders shook as she began to cry. “I could handle him rejecting me because I’m not his type, but I didn’t think that he’d go as far as his friends picking me as a pig and try to take me home and fuck me. I never realized how horrible a person he was.”

He sat up as well and leaned in, kissing her shoulder in comfort. The sight of her crying angered him especially when the cause of her misery was due to someone she once trusted. “If his fate were in your hands, what would you wish for him?”

“I wish he were dead,” she sniffled. “And it needs to be slow and painful.”

He could do that.

The only problem was she didn’t know he could.


Chapter End Notes:

I've always loved writing in Sebastian's point of view. It's really intense, LOL.

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Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.