CHAPTER 25

Naomi wiped the tears from her face when she heard the sound of her husband coming into their bedroom.

She looked down at the notes she had been making on revising her business plans to show Saint Luc, realising it had been a while since she'd been concentrating on it as she had been swept away by thoughts of her mother-in-law.

Still just a week into September but she was able to enjoy the spray of sunshine on their adjoining balcony.

“Naomi.”

“I'm out here.”

He was already behind her and she lifted up her head as he brought his head down to meet for a kiss.

Still in his work clothes, he made himself comfortable in the lounge chair opposite her.

Naomi noted the glass half-full with brown liquid in his hand. The offensive smell permeating her senses were the tell-tale signs of whisky.

He smiled to himself as he looked up at the sky, sipping, before turning to her. “Ah should I bring the cigars madmoiselle?”

“No I'll do without,” she responded with a tight smile.

Naomi had noticed that as of late Saint-Luc had been drinking more. And based on past records, she had cause to be worried.

She'd confronted him two nights ago asking if there was anything that was bothering him with work, his mother, and that maybe they should see a therapist. But Saint-Luc was old-fashioned in that sense and had immediately said no, saying there was nothing that she needed to be concerned about.

But he made it hard for her to believe him because lately when they were intimate it felt like he was inside his own head and not present. And yet after he would put his arms around her tight as if pleading not to leave him.

Most nights she'd had to throw the covers away because of how uncomfortable she would get from all the heat and sweat of their bodies stuck together.

Still it was her husband and she loved him and he needed her.

After the incident with the police questioning she'd really had lost some faith in her abilities but Saint-Luc had made her feel so strong and appreciated as his woman and she just prayed she could be the same for him as her husband.

And so as she sat looking over at Saint-Luc she found it hard to calm her doubts about returning back to Napoli the following week even though that had been the agreement between both of them hence the reason why they'd arranged to have this business meeting for ADE.

It was approaching Fashion Week and to her surprise she'd been invited to a few shows in Milan without using her husband's name to leverage, albeit they were fashion shows of designers less well known. But to her it was not a problem, if anything it would serve as inspiration.

“Okay, so there's my business plan and please be honest with your feedback,” she said as she handed over the thin document. “As a preface I want ADE to be a social enterprise. The economy in Italy is a little fucked up, moreso the South and I want to do my bit in investing in my country.”

She watched as Saint-Luc slowly flicked through her business plan knowing that one of the things she loved about him was how good he was at retaining multiple sources of information at the same time.

“I want to be a father.”

Naomi's face went blank. “What?”

“This is a five year business plan that you have. Do you even realise how much work it's going to take for you to reach your goal? And no, I'm not doubting your abilities but as your business partner and husband it's right for us to discuss about when we're going to have children. Despite how I look Naomi, I'm not getting any younger,” Saint-Luc finished with a small smile on his face.

Naomi was trembling inside. It was taking everything in her to maintain calm – at least on the outside.

“Saint-Luc where is this coming from? You've just buried your mother. Bringing a baby into this will just complicate this.”

But Saint Luc was not listening. “It won't complicate anything. I want to be a father.”

Naomi knew Saint-Luc had grown tunnel vision and he would persist until he got what he wanted. She watched as he fininshed the last of the whisky, still holding onto her business proposal.

“Saint-Luc I'm 20 years old. I don't want to have children right now, but...but if it's something you want then we can look into surrogacy.”

“Are your hips broken?”

Stunned by the anger in his eyes that could cut a stone in half, she was defaulted to answer. “No-no they're not.”

“So why can't you carry our children?”

“Saint you're not listening to me. I'm too young to be a mother.”

For stretched moments he didn't say anything. His unflinching gaze left her on edge. “So when do you think you're going to be ready?”

Never. When she was younger she always fantasised about having her own family but growing up and dealing with depression killed her childhood delusions. ADE was now her baby. And Saint-Luc was her beloved and she knew any child would be lucky to have him as a father but she didn't believe in her abilities to be a mother.

This was something they ought to have discussed before being married but their union was nothing of the conventional kind.

“Saint I have to think about it. Please.”

“What were you doing in London two weeks ago? And before you twist your mouth to deny it I had my security tell me they followed you to Charles De Gaulle and found you at the London Heathrow check-in desk before you went through security. You told me you were going to Napoli to check on work the contractors were doing on your shop.”

Each heavy thump of her heart was enough to knock her into unconsciouness. Naomi couldn't think straight and the suffocating guilt made it difficult to hide the tears that glossed her eyes.

In her panic, she'd forgotten about the discreet security personnel Saint had. She berated herself because if she hadn't been so insistent on having her aisle seat changed to the window, the security would never have known her destination.

“I'm sorry that I lied to you but I didn't want to tell you that I was going to see my parents. I knew that you wouldn't be in support of me doing that.”

Saint's earlier suspicious look resolved more at her answer, and that only added to her guilt. “You still should have told me. I'm your husband.”

“I know. I'm sorry.”

“It's fine now. So how was it?”

“It was okay.”

The unconvinced look on Saint Luc's face was back again. “It was okay?”

“Yeah, sorry. I don't really want to get into it now,” she said fighting hard to remain eye contact with him.

“Are you hiding something from me Naomi?”

“Saint Luc you're being paraoid for no reason. You need to rest.”

At her answer, he said nothing and she promptly rose up from her chair saying she wanted to get something to eat to which Saint Luc followed suit saying he would have a closer look at her business plan later.

And later that night Naomi was sat round his waist giving him a back massage. She found the act itself and intimate as they made small talk with one another, even though she couldn't stop thinking about their conversation earlier.

These thoughts led her thinking about the marriage dynamic between Amirah and Saint-Yann. There were several instances in the week she was at their home that she was irked by what she saw, especially how Saint-Yann would demand something from her without any room for compromise.

“Hey what did you say?”

Too engrossed in her thoughts Naomi hadn't heard him speak the first time. She raised herself up as she felt him turn on his back to look up at her, and when she was about to move away he grabbed her thighs and pressed her down on his pelvis.

“I said I want us to make love.”

The look he gave her, she knew he would plant a baby that very night if she let him.

Naomi was fighting with all her might to keep her composure intact. Sighing she gently removed his hands on her laps and laid beside him instead.

From underneath the blankets she grabbed her husband's hand and kissed his palm softly. “Not tonight baby.”

And without giving him chance to respond or for her to linger any further on his hurt, handsome face she turned around.

What Saint-Luc couldn't see were the tears free-falling from her eyes as she clutched onto her belly.

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