Penname: Fatal Mars [Contact]

Real name: Day Turner

Member Since: August 07 2010

Membership status: Member

Bio:

I am a 25 year Texan that currently resides in California. I have been married for two years and I am currently emloyed as a teacher. I find myself pron to being lazy, but I always have the intention to finish what I start.


 



Beta-reader: Yes
On Hiatus: Yes

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Reviews by Fatal Mars


Rated: 17 and older
starstarstarstarstar
[Reviews - 115]
Summary:

tbk


Camille Jones accepted society's problem with her body long ago. Yet, she can't help the insecurity felt when approached by gym owner Ryan Kahuna, he was most women's wet dream. He could have any woman he wanted. 


Including her.



Table of Contents
Categories: Original Fiction
Characters: Original Character(s)
Classification: General
Genre: Comedy , Erotica, Family, Friendship, Romance
Story Status: Active
Pairings: Original
Warnings: Adult Situations, BDSM, Extreme Language, Fluff, Kink, Original Characters, Racism, Sexual Content , Strong Sexual Content , Un-betaed , Work in Progress
Series: None
Chapters: 5
Completed:No
Word count: 11368
Read Count: 16316
Published: July 30 2014
Updated: August 28 2014


Title: Chapter 5: The -Itis

I am really enoying this story the realness is refreshing and your rants crack me up. So I wanted to commend you on the buildup of the courting of the characters since people usually rush this along. I also love that they aren't perfect ahhhhhhh so refreshing. I did want to say that in the first 2 chapters I noticed some moments when Ryan was acting like a woman. I know inside every man is a women, but some instances seem to throw me off. For example when he says that he wants to scream its an uncommon term for guys. I hate to wind the wheels of the gender roles car, but I just wanted to add a teeny tiny critique.  I really like how Camilles character is coming out in layers she is so fun!

Reviewer: Fatal Mars Signed
Date: November 14 2014

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.