So, all of the sudden she wants to have a baby. So she is not only Mike's punching back she is also DUMB.
This story is just a mess; the story doesn't have a flow, from the second chapter foward you start bringing a lot of characters without the being properly introduced, as the reader I'm not able to know who is saying what, because is all in this mess of words that is very difficult to understand.
My advice to you would beta to get a beta and start fixing the chapters you have before you post more.Reviewer: Confused Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 09/08/11 09:36 am
This story is a HOT MESS. It It needs detail and detail to give it more like . Very one dimensional, there is no reason or ryhme to this madness. As an author there needs to be flow . FIND the FLOW and POSSES IT. Please!!Reviewer: Lost in space Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 09/05/11 01:15 pm
well this is like a mob story lovin it girl you better keep on hated 4 it 2 stop can't wait 4 next ch. glad U intro DOM N makes story more intriguing personaly I'm team DOM SHE NEEDS SOMETHING NEW N more ways than 1.Reviewer: kvgurl Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 04/05/11 06:35 am