I have to say you're currently on fire! Loving Lay Me Down and Toxic! I agree with reviewer below about James telling Tristan about her past before he gets hurt but in the same time I think it's going to be hard for James to do that seeing how she is doing everything in her power to bury and forget it...
Can't wait till the next update! Thank you!
Author's Response: LOL, thank you! I'm so glad that you like Lay Me Down and Toxic. James is going to have to tell Tristen eventually and you're right about it being hard for her to do that because she is trying hide her past and keep walking forward, but with Trigger and Pearl following her, she's scared to look over her shoulder. Reviewer: Cassius_Noir Signed
[Report This]Date: 04/10/10 05:00 pm
So,basiclly Trigger is a product of a cycle. Don't get me wrong that don't excuse him for any of his actions. I broke the cycle in my family of having kids in my teens and dropping out of school. TY for the family history. Marvin do your thing to get rid of the to succibus. I don't think he should wait for James to ask, like the old Nike saying go: Just Do It.
Yeah James is going to have to tell Tristen about her past before he get hurt. She has to know that Trigger will go after him. All I hope is Tristen will be the man I think he is and not judge her for something that her so called mother and boyfriend made her do.
Author's Response: Wow, that's really inspiring! There has been a few cycles in my family that I broke as well, so I understand where you are coming from. Marvin might just take the situation into his own hands and 'take care' of Trigger. As for James, she is definitely going to have to tell Tristen about her past, but telling someone her past is like exposing a piece of her that she preferred to be shut off from the world. Thanks for your review! Reviewer: Dimples Signed [Report This]
Date: 04/10/10 04:42 pm
I think I've listened to one of the Jonas Brothers C.D.s and, I can't lie, though I like some of their stuff, an entire CD of it made my head hurt. 3 Doors Down brought me back to a happy reality.
Author's Response: Ah, I like their earlier songs, but I think the Jonas Brothers are pretty cool. Good influences for the younger generations to look up to.
Date: 03/10/10 06:11 am
At the office: I liked what I learned about Tristen, although my dislike for Yvonne was immediate. As it was with Pearl and now Charles. They are both disgusting, and Yvonne embodies incompetence in the work place. Sure she may be smart and she may get things done, but the way she talks may very well be the thing that keeps her from moving up the old corporate ladder.
That uncomfortable and tense meeting with Charles was just that - tense and uncomfortable. And what sort of Mother pushes her daughter into the drug business.
Which Jonas Brothers CD are they referring to?
James seemed to be contradicting herself this chapter. She came off as timid outside the restaurant, waiting for him to open the door for her, yet she seemed to do a 180 later on, asking him his favorite position. Which felt a bit trashy.
I'm on the fence on this one, I'll see what happens next chapter.
Author's Response:
There was no particular CD in mind for the Jonas Brothers reference in the chapter. I actually have nothing against the Jonas Brothers, but I wanted to add a bit of humor between the main character and her best friends.
I completely understand where you are coming from with James contradicting herself in chapter two. I guess as I was writing it, the whole sex question scene was meant to be used as an icebreaker between James and Tristen.
Thank you for being honest, it was greatly appreciated. I'll try to correct my mistakes.
Date: 03/10/10 02:48 am
I quite like James, my humor resembles hers. A lot of people don't quite get why I laugh when I do either. Or why I find certain things humorous. Oh, well. I like her and her name; females with traditionally male names are a preference of mine. I've got a character called Devyn, I love her to bits. I like Tristen, Quinn and Xander as well, all for different reasons. Xander I knew was gay from jump, don't ask me how. I like this story and I will be reading on.
Something I noticed, though, is that there are quite a few missing words throughout the chapter and there are moments when words are used out of place. Like differently where different should be. If this was done purposely, then my bad. ^_^
Peace.
Author's Response: Yes, I love females with traditional male names as well. :) My name is somewhat of a traditional male name, at least I think so because every time go somewhere that requires an appointment, they always say 'mister such and such' when they call my name. As for the missing words and words out of place, I will definitely check into that. Sometimes, when I edit my chapters before I post them, I might accidently skipped over it. I will correct them for sure. Thanks for your review! Reviewer: TRaberah EH Signed
[Report This]Date: 01/10/10 02:54 pm
Realistic story, good. ^_^ There is enough Supernatural and Paranormal out there. I'm looking forward to this, love the characters pictures.
Question: Is that Tyler from Baldwin Hills in your story banner?
Author's Response: No, it's actually Chrisette Michele. She is a R&B artist sings some great, refreshing music, LOL. I didn't actually know who Tyler from Baldwin Hills was until just now. :) I can see how they look alike. Thank you so much for your review! Reviewer: TRaberah EH Signed
[Report This]Date: 01/10/10 10:27 am
i love it!
Author's Response: Thank you!
Date: 01/10/10 03:05 am
I have a feeling she is going to have to get both Trigger and for mother(I use that term loosely) put in jail for life to get away from them and live the life she want.
I think she needs a new start with Tristen in Paris after all this is over.
I am waiting for Tristen ex to come to the US and TRY to cause some kind of trouble and I wonder if her uncle know she cheated on him because I have a feeling he didn't tell him because Tristen seems like a nice guy and wouldn't want her uncle to think bad of her.
I like the scene leading to the kisss as well as the kiss.
I have a feeling that place she told him to meet her is her freind's club and he will geet to see her sing. By the way what is James' major.
Author's Response: I've been debating whether or not Tristen's ex should come visit him and try to make amends, but if I were to do that she wouldn't come until much later in the story as I want to develop Tristen and James' relationship further. As for James' major, she is just giving a bachelor in arts for the moment though most likely she will change it. Thanks for your review! Reviewer: Dimples Signed [Report This]
Date: 27/09/10 01:59 pm
Me likey.
Author's Response: Thank you! :)
[Report This]Date: 27/09/10 09:13 am
Excellent beginning, love how each character is laid out. I like that your writing gives the reader a great visual of what's going on. Keep up the great work, can't wait for chapter 3.
Author's Response: Thank you. That really motivates me as a writer and lets me know that I must be doing something right. :) Chapter three update coming soon!
Date: 26/09/10 03:32 pm
The kiss was the best. It was a simple kiss without going into details but it left James saying "wow..." - I'm a greedy person and hope you update soon!!!
Author's Response: Ha! The kiss scene was very fun to write, but originally it wasn't apart of the plan. Sometimes characters put you in a headlock and force you to write it even if it wasn't apart of the plan, LOL. Thanks for your review!
[Report This]Date: 26/09/10 11:06 am
I like the progression so far. Matter of a fact I love everything your doing with thi.
But there is one detail that bothers me; you keep reminding us how old the characters are
The twenty two year old
The twenty six year old
Perhaps your afraid of being to repetitive when refrencing your characters by there given names? when describing and individual action ??? Dont be :)
Besides that, this is a good follow up chapter
It kinda pulls you out of the story.
Author's Response: Ah, I'm sorry. It's a habit of mine and yes, I use it to not be repetitive, but it's coded into my writing patterns now though as I have been doing it for years, but I completely understand where you are coming from and never thought of it as pulling someone out of the story. I will definitely try to use it less. Thank you for pointing that out! :) Reviewer: a fan Anonymous
[Report This]Date: 26/09/10 08:24 am
awesome. james asnd tristen are good 2gether, her snarkiness and all. too bad mommy dearest and trigger aren't....up to par.
Author's Response: Thank you. Yes, Pearl and Trigger aren't definitely are 'up to par'. I agree with you there.
[Report This]Date: 26/09/10 06:57 am
Great update. I like this one already...can't wait until secrets are revealed and will Tristen return to Paris? With James? What about the ex? Not to mention James's past...
Of course my favorite scene from this chapter is of them kissing on the boardwalk.
Author's Response:
Originally, I wasn't going to write the kissing scene because I thought it would go against James' personality, but it worked out because Tristen, that French little bastard, tricked her. :) But obviously, you didn't see James complaining, lol. As for your other questions, James' past will be further mentioned in chapter three. I am juggling between some possibilities for Tristen if he returns back to Paris. Thanks for your review!
Reviewer: R. Anonymous
[Report This]Date: 26/09/10 06:20 am
Great update. I really like this story .
Author's Response: Thank you! :)
[Report This]Date: 25/09/10 08:53 pm
Thanks for a great start to the story. I am looking forward to reading more. Thanks
Author's Response: Thank you! More chapters coming your way.
[Report This]Date: 25/09/10 06:28 pm
I like the cast especially the picture of Trigger...LOL. Thanks
Author's Response: LOL, yes. When I first saw it I knew that it was the perfect picture to portray Trigger even if the story has a bit of a dark undertone to it. I couldn't help myself.
[Report This]Date: 25/09/10 06:25 pm
To be the first chapter I liked it a lot and I hope - pray! - you update soon!
Author's Response: Thank you! Chapter three will be updated maybe next week or the week after though lately I've been updating much sooner than usual, but keep an eye out! Reviewer: Cassius_Noir Signed
[Report This]Date: 24/09/10 02:10 pm
I love how real James and her friends come across. No cookie cutter sues in this story and I thankyou for it.
They kinda reminded me of my GF's and I when we were young and a lil more goofy acting ( no sense ) lol but in a fun way.
James is turning out to be an interesting character. Drug trafficking eh? Now I definitely would like to know more about her and how she fell into that mess and dug her way out.
Looking forward to Tristan and James interacting as well.
Lovely start!
Author's Response:
It's kind of funny that you say that my characters remind you of you and your friends when you were younger because I was basing Quinn and Xander off of my friends. :) But I am glad that they felt realistic to you because that tells me that I need to keep doing what I am doing. There is a lot more Tristan and James coming your way and a little tension too! Thank you for reviewing.
Reviewer: brightnova01 Signed
[Report This]Date: 24/09/10 06:56 am
Like the Banter between James and Tristian! Great start. Please continue.
Author's Response: Thank you! I enjoy writing the dialogue between them though I thought it was going to be a little hard to write what a French guy would say and all, but I think I am getting somewhere, LOL. Update coming soon!
[Report This]Date: 24/09/10 12:53 am
I like this story so far. I like James dry sense of humor. I already can't stand Pearl and I don't know what she did to James. As for pearl's man Charles I have a feeling he want James living with them so he can make a move on her and try to get her to take her mother's place in the bedroom.
I think Tristen is just what James need in her life, she just doesn't know it yet.
Author's Response: The whole situation between James, Charles, and Pearl will be hinted in chapter two, but further explained in future chapters. I agree with you that Tristen is exactly what she needs in her life, but she is afraid that if she lets someone into her life, they will take off running once they find out about her past. Thank you for your review! :) Reviewer: Dimples Signed [Report This]
Date: 23/09/10 03:36 pm
That dude you have for the Tristen character is HOT!!!!! Can't wait till the next update
Author's Response: LOL, the actor's name is Guspard Ulliel and he is a French actor. I discovered him upon watching a few French movies one day. If only, if only.
Date: 23/09/10 05:23 am
I liked the first chapter. James is kinda what you expect when someone has a hard life the way it comes off of her. The only person I don't like is Pearl, and I dont even really have a clue as to what she did to her daughter but I get the feeling whatever it was Pearl needs to be kicked in the teeth for it.
I am really intrigued by Tristen and James. I cant wait to see how their relationship developes. I really just have one question is James her actual name or is it short for something else. I can't wait to read the next chapter. Thank you for sharing.
Author's Response: James is her actual name. It wasn't until after I had written and posted the story did I realize that my username is Missus James, LOL. James isn't my real name though so I guess that's okay. As for Pearl, I can't say right now what she did exactly, but I will say that it's the worst thing a parent can do to a child. Reviewer: JovanBleu26 Signed
[Report This]Date: 23/09/10 04:12 am
loved...it pretty plz update soon :)
Author's Response: Thank you! Chapter two will be posted by the end of the weekend. So keep an eye out. ;)
Date: 23/09/10 01:45 am
Definitely agree with flikchick keep it coming I enjoy the dry humor.
Author's Response: Thank you! I didn't know if it was too overwhelming or not. :)
[Report This]Date: 23/09/10 01:21 am