"Jude, I love the landscaping. It's so lush and green." Samara rambled on once they were out of the car.

"God you sound like Noah, going on and on about flowers and greenery, blah blah blah...blaah blaah blaah." Jude joked, gathering their bags.

"No I don't..." Samara laughed, reaching for her hat off the seat. "I was about to compliment you on your green thumb capabilities; but now I think I won't."

"Who said I did the landscaping?" Jude asked removing his sun glasses and eyeing her with amusement.

"I know you did. It's your style." She winked at him.

"Come on let's get inside. It's hot out here." He insisted, smiling at her.

"Are you sure this is your beach house?" Samara asked, stopping at the first step up the porch.

"Yeah. Why?" Jude asked, with a twinkle in his eyes.

"Because this is no house, Jude; this is a freakin' hotel."

Jude burst out laughing at her excitement.

"Trust me, it only looks big on the outside." He assured. "It's much cozier inside."

The structure was a modern seaside cottage painted a soft yellow trimmed in white with, a wraparound porch that was a wonderful compliment to the towering hand carved doors that stood guard at the entrance.

"Wow, where did you find these doors?"

"A salvage yard, I think that they used to be church doors but I'm not sure."

Jude stepped around her to open the doors, "Welcome to Casa del mar." Opening the heavy wooden door, he ushered Samara inside the house.

Upon entry, guests were welcomed in with a fantastic view of the beach just steps away. High ceilings and huge picture glass windows on the opposite side of the room greeted them, and highlighted the open and airy features of the entire house.

Looking around the space, Samara couldn't help but gush, "I love it! And this view is spectacular."

Samara was immediately bowled over by the high drama of his beach house. The common living area was one big open space and decorated in a nautical theme. Outfitted in salvaged and refurbished boat furniture in creams, blues, and whites the house looked like a model home for Coastal Living magazine. 

Rushing to take in more of the view she left Jude standing at the door. "But we'll have to come up with a better name than house by the sea."

He smiled; pleased that she liked his beach retreat.

"Did you do all of this?" she asked gesturing at the beautifully decorated space.

"No, I didn't. Eli actually gets all of the credit."

"Eli? Millie's son?"

"Yep. He's a wiz at this sort of thing. I had a client who couldn't pay his invoice once we were done with his car. But he needed the money from the sale of that car to help with some family problems; so he offered me the beach house in lieu of cash. The house was worth more than my bill but you'd never know it; you should have seen this place before Eli got a hold of it. It was nothing but a dump; but he saw the potential and was sure that he could turn this into something spectacular and he did."

"He really did. Jude, this house is amazing. I can't wait to see the rest."

"I like each one of my homes to have a little something extra; and the view of the beach is definitely the something extra here."

"This is really breathtaking. And the furniture is I don't know? Wow." Moving to the bar area she ran her hands over the repurposed captain chairs that now functioned as bar stools.

"Eli actually made most of it." Jude pointed out.

"He did?"

"He has real talent. And he believes in recycling. You should see the furniture he made for the cabin."

"Cabin? So, how many homes do you own?" Samara asked, still in awe of her surroundings.

"I own a few. But if you specifically mean how many do I actually spend time in?" Jude smiled, "Then that number is 4."

"Four homes?" Samara asked incredulously.

Jude laughed at her reaction, "Yes, I get a little restless sometimes so I like to have options; there's the ranch house, the townhouse on the square, this beach house, and a cabin in the north Georgia Mountains."

"You own a cabin close to home?" Samara asked, referring to the Mathers' family home in Raburn County.

"Oh god no, I never want to see that place again; no, my cabin is near Blue Ridge." Jude answered, putting their bags down near the hallway.

"Noah took me to Clayton once, it's quaint." 

"Code word for....?" Jude asked deviously.

"Code word for nothing, it was nice." She smiled, walking back to the large window.

**************

Showing her to her the first bed room, Jude watched as she enthusiastically appraised her sleeping quarters.

"Oh my, this is perfect." Samara exclaimed, looking back at him.

The room was done in crisp clean white furnishings except for the custom made pieces. The bed's headboard and footboard was made from salvaged driftwood. She didn't know how Eli created it but it was truly a work of art. And the window seats made from recycle picket fence material, were too cute.

"I love this room. It is perfect" She looked around taking in the numerous windows and then she spotted it; easy access to the beach.

Opening the French doors that lead to deck, was like welcoming in a new day. The sunshine felt heavenly on her skin; and the blue of the ocean that dominated the view looked so tempting that she couldn't wait to go for a swim.

Jude watched her as she excitedly drank in the inviting beach scenery, and was enjoying her reactions to the new surroundings. Samara had a way of putting him at ease and liked having her around. 

Rushing back inside, she tossed her hat on the bed.

"OK, so the first thing that I want to do is to grab lunch down on the boardwalk. Then on to the lighthouse, oh and I have to see Ft. Pulaski."

"Whoa, slow down there...we aren't leaving until Sunday. We have plenty of time to see the sights. You won't miss a thing."

She stopped moving and looked over at him, "Ok, but I'm going to hold you to that. You promise?"

"I do." Jude promised. "Let's go have lunch."

This is going to be a long weekend; he thought to himself.

********************

"So seafood then?" Samara asked as she and Jude strolled along the boardwalk. They had been going back and forth about what to eat for lunch.

"Umm...No...I was thinking that we could do a seafood boil tonight for dinner?"

"That sounds yummy, so should we do something light now and then stop back at that seaside market on the way back home for our dinner items?"

"That sounds like a plan. We can just walk until something catches your eyes. Whatever you want; this is your weekend."

"Good; does that mean I can have ice cream for breakfast?" Samara grinned.

Jude stopped walking and turned to look at her, with a smirk on his face. "No...now stay focused; we are on a lunch finding mission."

Jude heard her grumble something about not really having anything you want, if can't get ice cream for breakfast and laughed at her antics. She reached for his hands as they continued walking along the boardwalk; he liked the feeling of holding her hands and enjoyed watching her reaction to everything she saw. 

Samara was loving her leisurely stroll with Jude; truth was she wasn't really that hungry, she just enjoyed being with him. Here at the beach he seemed so relaxed and at peace, which was in contrast to his usual persona. He wasn't even wearing his trademark motorcycle boots, denim jeans and dark t-shirt. Instead he wore light linen pants, a white polo shirt and of all things on his feet, Italian leather driving shoes. When she asked him about them on the drive here, he jokingly replied that they were his contribution to the whole Hollywood glam vibe she was going for. She smiled at that; he was so accomodating to her and it made her feel special.

As they continued on, she noticed women eyeing them as they walked along. Some discretely, others very blatant.  At first she wasn't sure if was because they were an interracial couple, despite it being 2010, this was still the south and this type of thing was still ‘new' to some. But she notice that more and more the women weren't looking at them; they were ogling him. Jude seemed to be oblivious to it because never once did he look at any of them or made reference to it; he just kept asking her about each restaurant they passed. She felt proud having this extremely handsome and attentive man on her arm; even if it was only for this weekend, he was all hers.

"You must be tired, you've said no to just about all of the restaurants down here." Jude teased her, knowing how much she loved to eat.

"Funny." She replied hitting his arm. But her eyes lit up as soon as she spotted an antiques store. "Do you mind if I take a look inside?"

"No, I'll be right out here waiting for you, gnawing at my hands because you refused to feed me." Jude replied sarcastically and gave her a pitiful look; but Samara was not moved.

"We at least you can't say that I didn't give you water." Pointing to the nearby ocean. "I'll be back in 5 minutes and then let the lunch hunt can continue." She walked off, leaving him leaning against the pillars outside the shop smiling.

--------------------

"Jude Mathers, what brings you to Tybee Island?" Jude turned in the direction of the voice, to greet his client, Thorn Marchand.

"Thorn, good to see you buddy." He replied shaking his hands. "I am here for the same reason you're here."

"My wife sweet talked you into talking the boat out for a weekend, too?" Thorn joked.

Both men laughed and walked over to the empty seaside bar to share a drink and to catch up. A few minutes later two chatting ladies strolled out of the antique store and over to the seaside bar where the two men sat.

"Nia, Honey looked who I bumped into."

Samara stood off to the side and watched the interaction in front of her. The petite brown woman with the long flowing hair whom she'd been chatting with in the antique store was married to the tall dark haired man with the blues eyes sitting with Jude at the bar. Jude seemed relaxed in their company and she was glad to see that with them he wasn't as guarded as he normally was with others.

"Jude, it's great to see you. I am still loving my car, by the way." Nia Marchand kissed him lightly on the cheek and moved to sit next to her husband. "I know that a convertible isn't practical for a mother of 5 but, it's petite and cute just like me and I love it.  Thank you."

"I am glad you are enjoying it."

"And who is this lovely creature?" Thorn asked as Samara quietly moved to stand next to Jude.

"Oh I'm sorry, Samara I'd like to introduce you to Thorn and Nia Marchand; very good clients of mine. And this is..."

"Samara Mathers; it's nice to meet you both." Finishing Jude's introduction she gave them a handshake.

Both Thorn and Nia looked at Jude.

"You sly devil, you got married and didn't tell anyone? Well congratulations, it's about time you got hard over a woman instead of all those damn cars you play with." Thorn teased.

"Thorn!!" Nia screamed jabbing her elbow into her husband ribs. "You're worse than the kids; I swear you have no control over your mouth."

"What? I'm sure Samara agrees. Don't you, darlin?"

Samara blushed at his comment and so did Jude. But she did not respond to his question.

*********************

Samara listened to gentle lull of the waves crashing down on the shore. She decided to keep her French doors open to the night sounds of the beach. She was sure both Jude and Noah would have fit knowing that she had them open at this hour but she couldn't help it, the ocean's serenade was so soothing.

Even the quiet of the night couldn't persuade her to fall asleep so, she got out of bed and headed outside on the lanai. As she stared up at the moon in awe, Samara wished that she could bottle the night that was so peaceful and save it for the dark days that she knew were coming. 

Her mind wondered to her husband. She knew that her probably having a ball in West Palm Beach. When she spoke to him earlier he was so excited about exploring the Breakers that he practically rushed off the phone. That made her smile; she was glad that he was still living and enjoying life and not focusing on dying.

She thought about everything that they'd been through since his last diagnosis and couldn't help but admire his courage.  Initially, she was angry at Noah for asking Jude to father a child for them; but the more she thought about it, she realized that this was something that he needed. Noah always wanted children and often told her that he couldn't wait for the days to watch her swell with his babies. But with his multiple projects and demanding schedule, he never felt the time was right.

He told her that he would feel guilty leaving her to raise their children essentially alone, because he was always working. He wanted to wait until his firm was able to function without him. It could now, but ironically that did help their situation. In that regard, she could accept him asking Jude to father a baby with her; but what got her goat was him asking Jude to do it naturally, that had her fuming.

Her anger dissipated a few days later when she acknowledged the fact that Noah was right, she did miss their intimate interludes. Was Noah insane by asking his brother to be a natural donor? Samara asked herself that at least a thousand times. He reasoned that he knew she needed the intimacy that they could no longer share and it hurt him more than anything to watch his wife lose herself to his illness.  He felt that Jude was the perfect surrogate because not only did Noah trust him with his life, but he knew that Jude would love and take care of her, now and after his death. She couldn't argue that point, in the short time she'd know Jude, he had shown himself to be very sincere in everything he did.

She would use this time alone with Jude to talk about their predicament. She needed to know that he wanted to do this with her because he wanted to and not because Noah asked him to. Samara knew that she should feel some guilt over it; but she didn't. The more time that she spent with Jude, the more alive she felt; and she recognized the change in her demeanor almost immediately. Noah was right, she never realized it, but up until spending time with Jude, a part of her was on the verge of dying with him.

Her thoughts were momentarily distracted when she saw something flicker along the sand dunes.  She wasn't sure if she should flee but continued to watch as the shadow moved up the path. As it became more pronounced, she sighed in relief when she recognized Jude's approaching form.

Watching his approach had her heart racing. Instantly she felt her sex awaken. With each step he took, she imagined him moving closer to touch her, where she was desperately wanted to feel him.

He was shirtless and shoe less, clad only in a pair of unbuttoned blue jeans; with the moon light cascading down, scented blooms nearby, the splatter of waves in the background and this sexy bare chested southern god striding up the beach, Samara thought it was one of the most erotic images she had ever seen; seeing him now, she wanted his hard hot body pressed up against her like nobody's business.

He took the deck steps two at a time, staring into her eyes and the scowl on his face told her that he was none too pleased at seeing her out alone at that hour.

"What are you doing out here alone?" Jude queried, grabbing the outside shower head, to rinse the sand off of his feet.

Taking in her current state of dress, which consisted of short pink terry cloth PJ bottoms, a skinny strap tank top, and flip flops, Jude wasn't happy that she was sitting out there by herself in the middle of the night; not when she looked so damn delicious.

He was trying to avert his eyes from her lounging form, but he made the mistake of looking over at her when he stepped foot on the deck. Those legs that he had wrapped around his waist countless times in his dreams looked so tempting at the moment. Stretched out and slightly parted, putting her fat little ‘v' on display; and Jude wasn't sure if he was angry or aroused at the sight of it.

Her hair was fanned out on the pillows and her arms rested just above her head. Her position caused her shirt to ride up exposing her navel and the thin cotton material did little to conceal her erect nipples or that fact that she was bra less. The perky pair winked at Jude and his male muscle couldn't help but stare back.

Damn it if she didn't look like she was waiting for him to take her. Jude thought to himself.

"I couldn't sleep so I came out here to enjoy the quiet." She replied, getting up and handing him a towel.

"And you? You're out here because it seemed like a perfect time to go for a walk?"

"Actually yes, the beach is abandoned and quiet at this hour; except for the sound of the waves it's quite relaxing." Jude winked and sat down in the chair next to her.

They sat in silence until Samara asked, "How long have you known Nia and Thorn, they seem like very nice people."

"Yes they are; I met Thorn years ago at an auction. He and his brother Ari collect race cars and I've done a lot of work for them over the years. They have been married for a few years now and I just restored a 1980 Mercedes Benz convertible for Nia; a surprise for her birthday."

"It was kind of them to invite us to dinner on their boat tomorrow; well I guess tonight, I don't know what time it is."

"You say that now, but wait until we're on that boat and you're surrounded by their five kids. Talk about a handful." Jude laughed as he remembered the last time he visited Thorn at his private storage garage, with his three sons in tow.

Samara smiled at the thought of being surrounded by children and then suddenly blurted out, "Speaking of kids...thank you for offering to be our donor. I know Noah really wants this and he was hoping that you'd say yes."

Surprised by her words, Jude turned to look at her, but couldn't find the right words to respond. "So Noah finally told you, huh?

She nodded her head, unable to speak trapped in his gaze.

"How do you feel about it? What about you do you even want this? It would be your baby, too. I mean after he's gone it's your responsibility, no...That's not what I mean, I'd help you of course, because it would be my baby too; but I mean do you want this, with me? Because you have other options. Shit this isn't coming out right." Jude blew out a frustrated breath and started to get up, but her soft hands on his arms stopped him.

"I have to be honest Jude, when Noah first came to me with this I wasn't happy about it; I thought that having a baby was the last thing that we needed. But the more I thought about it and how happy it would make him in his last days; I had no choice but to give him that. I love him and I knew that it was the right thing to do.  Besides, Noah is right, he knows me, I would retreat into myself after he is gone, if I don't have something or someone to force me to cope. I think that our baby would give me purpose and be that sunshine that would make those dark days just a little bit brighter."

Jude thought on her analysis of their situation but was still cautious, "And what about the other thing?"

"You mean us making love?" Samara replied casually.

"Yes." Jude stood up moving to lean against the rail, looking off into the night. Hearing her say the words sent his pulse racing, "You seem so cavalier about this whole thing, while I'm lying awake feeling guilty for even thinking about you, sexually?

Hearing that sent fire racing through her body. Surprised Samara exclaimed, "You've thought about me sexually?" Shit I hope that I didn't sound like a needy tramp Samara thought to herself.

Jude looked over his shoulders to stare into her eyes, "Every day, since the day we met." He didn't know why he shared that information but saying it to her, he felt some relief.

She got up to stand next to him, "I thought of being with you, too." There I said it. 

Jude did a double take not believing what she just said. But the look in her eyes told him that she was being as honest as he was.

"Fuck Noah, for putting this shit in our heads." he looked over to her, "Sorry...about that."

She smiled at his apology.

"I thought about you, even before Noah shared his hope of us making a baby together with me." Samara whispered, thinking back to the night she climaxed to thoughts of him.

"If I sound so nonchalant, I don't mean to, it's just that... well I want to give this final gift to Noah, and it has to happen in the next few weeks; otherwise, the likelihood that he would ever see me pregnant is slim. So I figure the more comfortable we are with each other the sooner it can happen. I think that he just wants us to be happy together, Jude." Samara hoped that her explanation sounded more confident than her own feelings.

"His brother fu... having sex with his wife to knock her up, is supposed to make who happy exactly?" Jude bit out. He didn't mean to sound so nasty but this whole affair had him twisted in knots.

"I don't think he sees it quite like that.  I believe Noah sees you more as... his replacement, not as some lecherous pervert out to use me." She returned to the chaise, unsure of what to say next. "For whatever reason, he thinks that we can find our happiness together."

"Is that how you see me too? As Noah's stand-in?" Jude wasn't sure how he felt about that. Though he wasn't ready to admit it, he did have feelings for Samara; and knowing that she only saw him as a substitute for her husband would hurt him more than he could admit.

"Jude, honestly when I'm with you, I am ashamed to admit that I don't think about Noah. I am living in that moment with you. For however short a time I spend with you, I feel alive; I'm not dwelling on Noah's impending death or anything else. I know who you are Jude, so no I don't see you as his replacement; you can't replace him. You're you and he's Noah. You may look identical but you are not the same person."

Jude smiled at her but didn't say anything in response.

"Come here." Samara patted the spot next to her. He hurried over to her but sat towards the bottom of the chaise. He didn't trust himself to sit next to her as she indicated.

"What did you feel, the first time we touched?"

"Samara...." Jude hung his head to avoid her eyes. Being this close to her was dangerous territory. He thought that his impromptu respite had given him the strength he needed to not only face her but to temper the feelings that were quickly surfacing.

"I saw the signs of loneliness that lived in in you when we first met; much like it did when I was by myself. I promised myself then, that I would do everything I could to help you be free of it. Jude, you should never feel that lonely ever again; not when you don't have to and...neither should I."

She watched him for a reaction but he continued to stare at the ground.

"Listen Jude, I know Noah has put a lot of pressure on you these past few weeks over this. And I know that you want to appease him because of his illness; but you don't have to.  You can have any woman you want; so why would you want me? When Noah told me that he asked you to have sex with me I was angry. Not because I don't want to have sex with you, because I do."

 Samara sighed. "But it made me feel...I don't know... I guess undesirable, that my husband would have to ask his brother to do it; when on some gratifying level I wanted you to desire me as much as I had started longing to be with you."

Reaching for his hand, she moved closer to him. Stroking his arms she was hopeful that the contact would entice Jude to talk, but he remained silent.

"You are a handsome, loving, giving man and any woman would be lucky to have you in her life. It should be your choice who you have sex and father a baby with. So please know that it's ok if you don't want to do this with me."

Samara attempted to make eye contact, but Jude still averted his eyes. "As much as I would like for you to father our child and as much as it would please Noah; her voice was now shaky, I would hate to think that you agreed to do this, just out of loyalty to Noah or later felt trapped out of obligation to our baby. You can tell me no right now and...I'll be ok with it."

Samara sat back against the chaise waiting for Jude's response. When minutes passed and he still said nothing, she felt foolish. With slumped shoulders, it was now her turn to look away from him. She had put everything that she was feeling out there for him to hear, but now she wasn't so sure it was such a good idea.

She was positive that they had made a connection; she felt it every time that they were near each other. The sizzle in the air was palatable, every time they touched and her body seemed to come alive whenever they were close. Maybe she had read him wrong and was confusing her feelings for him with those for her husband.

She started to get up to leave, when he reached for her hands and looked at her. Her words had a soothing effect on his soul and her confession had his thoughts confused about what he wanted to say to her, when she moved even closer to him.

Jude smiled inside. He spent so many days in solitude and in deep thought over their situation; hoping that above all else that he was doing a good job of hiding his feelings for her. Little did he know that she was basically having the same thoughts about him?

Who knew that all the while he had feared that she would reject the notion of being with him to father her baby, she actually thought that he would reject her. It caught him by surprise hearing her words and the quiver in her voice; he knew that he had to come clean about his feelings.

He held her hands and kissed them; surprised by his touch she looked at him and offered a hesitant smile. "I find it ironic that you would think that I have options in my romantic life; when I haven't been out on a real date in over 3 years and I've never been in an adult relationship."

Jude reached for her and she got up from her spot to sit next to him. "I can't tell you what it does to me to know that you want me to father your baby; the first time I saw you, I thought to myself, she is absolutely gorgeous; my brother is a very lucky man. Maybe one day, when I get my shit together I'll be lucky enough to attract someone half as beautiful as you."

He looked to her and smiled, "But the more I got to know and spend time with you, I found you to be smart, giving, affectionate, and a whole laundry list of other things. And then I asked myself, why would she even consider me, she can have any man she wants to father her baby? Why me? Jude? With all of my issues? What woman would want to take that on?" Jude stood up to lean against the deck rail.

"But the more time I spent with you...the more I wanted to be..." He blew out a breath and began breathing deeply; he wanted to find the right words to say what he was feeling, but his thoughts were going a mile a minute.

Samara watched him with tears on the verge of spilling. Jude studied her for a minute and walked back to where she sat, sitting closer to her.

"I want you Samara, more than I have a right to; I have since the day I laid eyes on you. You are everything a man could ever hope for in his woman. I want to make love to you, I want to father your child, I want to make you happy but more than that, I want you in my life; for a very long time. Not only am I feeling guilty for wanting those things, for wanting my brother's wife, I...I am worried that...I will hurt you."

Staring into her eyes, he brushed away the tears that sat on her eyelids. "I don't know how to be gentle anymore, in words or in action... and the last thing that I ever want to do is hurt you. It would kill me." He confessed.

"You could never hurt me on purpose, Jude." She assured; moving both of her hands to his massive chest, she reached up to plant a soft reassuring kiss on his lips. "It's not in you."

He kissed her back softly, not wanting to take it any further than they were both willing to explore.

"I just don't want to hurt you...or Noah." He rubbed her cheek and she leaned into his warm hands.

"You won't; we've agreed to this. Noah's ok with it."

"In principal, he has; but what happens in reality?"

Samara didn't know the answer to that and she didn't want to delve into it at the moment.  All she wanted right now was to be lost in his warmth.

"Kiss me, Jude." Her body was aching for him and all she wanted was to be wrapped in arms. She should have felt guilty for wanting it, but she didn't.

With very little thought about anything else, Jude covered her mouth with his while his hands freely roamed her body. His kiss was tentative at first, asking her if she was sure she wanted it. When she parted her lips to welcome his tongue he knew that she wanted it.

Jude wanted to do more than just kiss her, but he didn't want her to think that was his main reason for bringing her to Tybee for the weekend. Stopping their kiss before it really started, Jude hesitantly pulled away.

"I didn't plan this; I mean...I want to be alone with you, I wanted to bring you to Tybee but not for..."

"I know." She silenced him with another kiss and this time he didn't pull away.

Jude was in a daze from her kisses. Her lips were so soft and he was enjoying the wet tango that danced in their mouths. Her warm tongue felt like fluid moving in his mouth and her body practically melted into his own. He was growing hard from their contact and as their kisses grew fiery, she was moist from need. His hardness poked her stomach as he pulled her closer to him; he needed more and from the way she hungrily returned his kisses, so did Samara.

His hands moved under her tank, and slowly made their way up to her breasts and to her taut peaks that had been calling to him all night. His thumbs softly glided over her nipples making them harder than they already were and her knees go soft. Hearing her soft moans and feeling her fingers in his hair tighten at the contact, brought Jude crashing back to reality.

If they were going down this path, he needed to share something with her. He wanted to be honest with her even if she now rejected him because of it.  But his mind went blank for a moment. He was loving the feel of her mouth and warm tongue dragging up and down his neck, Jude groaned when he felt her hands gently slide down his chest and hooked themselves onto the waistband of his unbuttoned jeans. He knew that they had to stop then. Slowly he broke their kiss, but she wasn't interested in taking a break; Samara continued trailing butterfly kisses along his jawline and neck.

He took a deep breath and gently coaxed her into looking at him.

"Samara, I need to tell you something. Before we...you need to know that I...I was..."

"Shhh," she stopped him. Pulling his face back to hers and then kissing him again, "I know everything that I need to know about you, Jude."

Taking his hands in hers, "It's late, let's go inside." she insisted, not waiting for his response.

Picking up his wet towel off the chaise, the pair made their way into her room.

****************

With his back to her as he closed the French doors, Jude felt his heart beating faster than it did, whenever he took one of his motor cycles out for a ride. He wasn't sure what would happen between them tonight but he knew that after the kisses they just shared he needed more of her.

 "Oh god, Jude..." Samara choked out, reaching to touch the scars on his back. Never in her worst nightmares could she begin to imagine what he suffered in his life and especially during the time he spent in prison.

Not turning around to meet her eyes, he knew that she spotted them. "Don't..." Jude rushed out, attempting to evade her touch.  He was so used to being alone at the beach house, he didn't think about grabbing a shirt on his way out the door. He hated that she found out about them this way.

Samara tried to ignore his request, but instead she wrapped her arms around him, resting her head against the scars etched into his skin. Jude froze at the contact but felt her warm tears drip on to his back as her hands moved along the hard smooth lines of his chest and stomach.

"They healed a long time ago; so don't shed tears over something that's buried in the past." He whispered, still facing the doors.

Over the years he had worked so hard to mask his emotions, but Samara was quickly changing that. Jude reached for her hands that were on his chest and stroked them tenderly. Her sob grew louder as her arms tighten around him.

He couldn't face her; not now. Not only didn't he want to seem weak in her eyes and for him those scars were a sign of just that, weakness. But he especially didn't want to see the pity that he knew would be in her eyes; or worse for her to see the tears that hovered on his own lids, at the sound of her crying. He felt Samara lean in closer to him and her nearness made his heart flutter.

Samara told herself that if it took all night, she would attempt to kiss away all the pain that she knew he still carried with each scar. He didn't deserve them or the hurt attached to them and he certainly shouldn't live like he was undeserving of someone's love and affection because of it.

He kept his feelings guarded from everyone for so long, Jude wasn't so sure how to express them or share them with her. When he felt her soft lips on his scars, Jude shivered at her touch; needing it more than he realized. He turned around to stop her from going any further but was so lost when he saw the tears streaming down her face.

His amber eyes gazed at her soft brown ones. Samara had only known him for a few short weeks, yet the emotion on her face was that of someone who had a vested interest in his wellbeing for much longer. It was a sad sort of comfort for him. Sad that she was in tears; but comforted that she was shedding tears for his pain.

Samara quickly slid her arms around Jude's waist and held him as tight as she could. "I am so sorry Jude." Samara cried harder and her body shook with each sob.

He wrapped his arms around her in return. "Don't be. It's all in the past." He breathed out. Still overcome by her emotional outburst and fighting his tears.

"Still; you live with this as a reminder every day and for that, I am so sorry." She choked out.

He didn't think it was possible to want her any more than he already did. But in that moment, hearing her sobs and seeing her tears for him, she had just earned another percent of his heart.

"Hey...no tears." Jude soothed, rubbing her back.

"I can't help it, Jude. I'm a crier."

"If you stop crying I'll buy you a pony." He teased, feeling her trembling subside a little. He had to get her to stop crying, for his sake more than hers.

"That only works if I'm five. And besides you gave me Legacy already, remember." She laughed softly. "I hate that you had to suffer through so much and most of it alone..."

"Don't think about that; I'm here with you now and I'm fine. I promise." He reassured her, kissing the top of her head and loving the way she felt in his arms.

"I should be the one comforting you," she smiled into his chest, "Yet you're the one holding me like the cry baby that I am."

"I'm not complaining; I like holding you close." He closed his eyes enjoying their closeness.

Samara wanted to comfort him. She wanted to say the words that would make all of his bad memories disappear; but the she couldn't think of the right words to say. She looked up at him and was happy to see that he was now looking at her. The sadness in his eyes touch something deep within her and knowing that he carried that pain everyday broke her heart; she took his hand in hers and led them to her bed.

Jude stopped short when she climbed in and waited for him to do the same. He knew where this was possibly headed. Though he wanted to, he was sincere when he told her that he didn't purposely plan to seduce her this weekend.

"Samara, I don't think..."

"Jude, will you hold me close; until I fall asleep?"

He looked at her and he knew that lying in bed holding her close would probably lead to other things. Jude was at war with himself over what to do; he was already harder than a quadratic equation and her nearness would only drive him insane. He had dreamed of this scenario a thousand times, since meeting her and never once did it involve simply holding her in his arms. Not that he didn't want to. But he wasn't sure if he trusted himself enough to simply lay there holding her.

"Just for a little while...please?"

**********************************

Jude laid there staring at the ceiling with Samara envelop in his right arm, as his fingers played in her hair. For him it was sweet torture having her draped across in chest but it felt so right lying there with her. With her left leg casually flung over his thighs, she softly stroked his arm; her head was just under his chin and the heat from their bodies was only slightly cooled by the gentle breeze sweeping in from the opened windows. The moon light poured into the room highlighting their cozy embrace and to anyone looking in, they would have thought that this was just another lazy summer night for a young couple in love.  

They had been talking about everything under the sun. From favorite movies to politics and all other topics in between and they were both enjoying this private time together.

Jude could only imagine one other pleasurable thing that could beat having Samara in his arms like this; and after what they shared tonight he was certain that it would happen in short order. He kept pushing that thought to the back his mind, otherwise as hard as he was moments ago she would know exactly what he was thinking.

There was something in way Jude touched her emotionally that made Samara want to share everything with him. She didn't think it was possible to find this type of tenderness with anyone other than Noah; but being with Jude now she knew that she was falling for him.

-------------------------

"The sound of the ocean reminds me of the summers that I used to spend with my grandparents in Virginia Beach. I couldn't wait for school to close; I loved it there." Samara smiled.

Jude listened as she talked about the fun she had over the summers with her family and rubbed her back when some of the memories grew sad. Samara even managed to get him to talk about his own adventures; she loved hearing about his summers in Savannah with Uncle Pete and all the trouble that he and Noah got into.

He laughed at all of her tales of her grandfather Rev. Harris. He wasn't sure if they were that funny or if it was because she was so animated when she told them; but he knew that he'd never laughed this much in a long time and he was enjoying having her to himself.

 "There was this festival every summer called the Sugar Coma and every year my grandpa and I would enter the team desert challenge, and it was a sad thing really; you had so many deserts to eat in, like a minute. When I was younger I was a real porker and worse I wore corrective lenses; this one summer my mom thought it would be cute to send me to the festival in a two piece; because eating the deserts could get so messy. Well I came out the door in my brand new swim suit and as soon as grampy saw me he yelled out ‘look at my little Fatty-Four-Eyes'; and from that day on that was his nickname for me."

Jude tried to hold back his laughter but couldn't, "I bet you look cute, though."

She continued her story over his laughter, "I'm not kidding, every summer he and I would enter that contest and we won five summers in a row. Everyone knew that Rev. Harris and Fatty Four Eyes was the team to beat."

"You're nuts...you know that right?" Jude cried in laughter when she made circles with her fingers and covered her eyes to show him what her coke bottle glasses looked like. He couldn't help the laughter that poured out of his body. 

"I swear that's how they looked...I have pictures, I'll show them to you when you come to Charleston." She teased.

"I like your laugh...it's genuine." Rubbing his arms and moving to look into his eyes, "You should do it more often. But not at my expense, of course."  

She was glad that she could make him laugh; the sound of his laughter warmed her heart and she was hopeful that this wouldn't be the last time she heard it. She could tell that he was embarrassed earlier that she saw his scars and her crying over them made him feel worst. That wasn't her intention; she wanted him to know that he never had to feel any shame with her.

"When are you going to take me to your cabin in Blue Ridge?" she asked, after their laughter died down to soft chuckles.

"When do you want to go?"

"I know that you're busy, Jude; I was just teasing you."

"I'd make time to take you; if you really want to go."

"You'd do that for me?" she perked up smiling.

"I'd do just about anything for you, Samara." Jude reached up to kiss her. The kiss was quick, gentle and promising.

She returned to lying on his chest and Jude continued combing his fingers through her hair.  He thought about what he's just said to her and he knew that he meant it. She was quickly becoming the owner of his heart.  But Jude knew for that to happen, he would have to let go of his pain that had become such a big part him and his life for all these years. It would probably be the hardest thing that he'd ever have to do. He would have to meet that challenge, because it was the only way that he would be ready to welcome in the love that was building for Samara.

-------------------------------

"What's your favorite song? And it can't be any of that awful crying country music or worse that depressing blues stuff."

"You don't like country or blues, this from a woman who grew up in the south?"

"No those musical genres are too whiny and depressing."

"Those songs are the stories taken from everyday life."

"Yeah well nobody's life can be that awful." She supposed.

Jude didn't say anything immediately; he thought about his awful life and shifted himself in the bed, to a sitting position.

"Well mine certainly was..."

Jude's movement surprised her and Samara stilled at his observation. His tone went from playful to serious and it caught her off guard. This was not the turn that she was expecting their conversation to take.

"Let me see... my father hated my guts from the day I was born, my mother told everyone that I had the eyes of a killer, I spent time in jail for a crime I didn't do, my uncle who encouraged me to go to college dies of a heart attack the day before my graduation, I have no family and...well except for the requisite dog reference in the country ditty and a cheating woman in the blues tune. Any one of those depressing songs could be an ode to my life."

"Jude, I'm sorry I didn't..." She sat up next to him and attempted to touch him but he stood up before she could. "I only meant..."

"Don't Samara; please I don't want your pity. I think I got my fill earlier." Jude started pacing the room, missing the way Samara cringed at his words.

"Pity? Is that what you thought that was? My heart broke for you, Jude. And you call my tears pity? I wouldn't do that to you." How could think that she asked herself. Tears were already building and before long they streamed down her face.

He stopped moving and his heart tighten when he heard her whimpers; looking over to her he saw her tears racing down her cheeks. Shit he'd managed to make her cry twice in one night. Her tears were quickly becoming his kryptonite.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to upset you." He apologized getting her a box of Kleenex.

Samara didn't respond or look up at him, she only took the tissues to dry her eyes; and that really made him feel like shit. He didn't know why he took her reference to sad music so personal, it was stupid and he was being overly sensitive.

"I know I over reacted just now; I don't know why it's so important to me Samara, but you're the one person I refuse to look weak in front of. And it feels like no matter what I do I come off that way; it's like a constant reminder that someone like you could do a lot better than being with someone like me."

He sat back down on the bed with his head handing down and reached for her hands. Samara took them and looked at him in disbelief.

"Don't do that, Jude; don't put me on a pedestal. I am just a regular person and you're wrong, everyone deserves to be with someone like you. I could never see you as being weak. Not when you're the strongest man I have ever met." His eyes shot up and met hers.

She was fighting tears and there was a quiver in her voice. She took a deep breath. Jude needed to hear just how special she thought he was.

"You spent time in prison for a crime you didn't commit. A weaker man would have let his time prison dictate his future, but not you. You've manage to build and an extremely successful business in a very short period of time."

 "Your uncle left you a repair garage and looked at what you've turned it into. You've earned your success with very little help from anyone else and you are not shy about sharing it with others. You give credit to everyone else for wins and take all the blame for the fails; you'll pitch in and help others become successful too, by supporting them in any way you can; even if they don't do the same for you. You are a multi-millionaire but you'd never know it because you are so humble in everything you do. A weaker man would make his way to the nearest camera if only to point out all of his accomplishments and material gains."

"You say you don't have any family but you're wrong. Millie and Russell have been there for you since you were a child. They love you and fuss over you as if their last names were Mathers. And you treat them as if they were your own parents. Though they technically work for you, you take care of everything for them, Russell's new truck, Millie's trips to California every year to see her sisters. Every Sunday your family shows up for dinner and fill your house with love and laughter. A weaker man wouldn't open his house so freely to others or pay for trips or anything else."

Moving to she straddle his lap, she locked eyes with him; fearing that he would flee if her words became too much for him to hear. Jude wanted to look away because her words were reaching his soul and he knew that he was at the apex of his own emotional awakening and he wasn't sure if he was ready to share that moment with anyone; not even her.

 "You are so generous with your money and never hesitate to use it if it can help others. Look at that kind thing you did for that elderly couple Thorn mentioned today. You saved them from financial ruin by purchasing their entire car collection for more than they were asking, because they needed the money.  You helped Eli start his business and refused any sort of repayment; you bought Lily's school the new playground equipment because they couldn't raise the money to cover the cost; you donate money to charities though you do it anonymously and you never seek praise for what you do; but a weaker man would need that recognition if only just to brag about it."

Hearing her talk about him so adoringly had him on the verge of tears. He tried to stare out onto the beach but she wouldn't let him. She fought to hold his gaze and it only made him want to hold her closer.

 "Your brother whom you've not seen in 10 years walks back into your life to ask you to forgive him, for sending you to jail for a crime that he committed. A weaker man would have snapped his neck in two the minute he saw him. But not you Jude; not only have you worked towards forgiving him, you've agreed to father a child for his wife so that he can die in peace knowing that he didn't leave her or you  alone without any family. A weaker man would have never even entertained the thought. But you, you are going to give me the baby I so desperately wanted."

Her voice broke at that last part and she watched him blinking back tears that now glisten in his eyes Jude buried his face in her neck and she felt him shudder. Samara felt his kisses there but it was immediately replaced by his tears.

"And as much as you want to make love to me tonight, you won't; your conscious won't allow you to because you have not cleared it with Noah. Not that you need his permission at this point, but because you don't want him to think that you were sneaking around with me behind his back. You still respect him as your big brother and you never want to do anything to hurt him.  A weaker man would have had me on my back hours ago and not give a damn about Noah's feelings."

Both Samara and Jude were in tears; his head was on her shoulders and her arms snaked around his neck; she rubbed his neck and kissed the sides of his face as his tears grew into heavy sobs. She encouraged him to cry and let go of his pain and reassured him that with her he never had to feel ashamed, weak or inferior.

He had never shared himself so intimately with another, and when Samara cradled him in her arms and whispered in his ears, "You do so many wonderful things for others and you never ask for anything in return. How could I ever see you as anything other than a tower of strength? Your heart is as big as that ocean outside and you may not believe it but, you are so easy to love that it's impossible not to love you. You deserve to be happy and you deserve to be loved; but you have to believe that before anyone else can." Jude lost it. His tears fell faster than rain and his arms locked her to his body.

Jude knew what she was saying was the truth and in his heart he truly wanted to feel love. But after being denied it for so long he wasn't sure if he received it, that he would know how to reciprocate. Samara said that he was easy to love but he knew that learning to give his love would be his challenge.

Samara continued to whisper loving words in his ear as he cried; though she was barely holding on herself, she was determined to help him through this, so that he could find the peace and love that he desperately wanted.

"You have to let it go Jude, let go of all that pain that's bottled up inside; it is holding you hostage."

"I can't," he whispered into her neck, ‘it's all I have."

"No it's not; you have me and pretty soon, you'll have our baby too." Placing his hands on her middle she held them there. "And we'll need you at 100 percent and ready to take care of us."

Jude's head immediately shot up and he met her eyes that was wet much like his own. He opened his mouth to speak but the words died on his lips before he could get them out.

Never had anyone's words have such a profound effect on him; and the warmth of her holding him in her arms like this melted his heart. When he felt Samara reached down and kiss the tears from his eyes, Jude knew that she had changed him in that moment and that his heart was forever hers.