Caleb was just finishing up his lunch when Casey walked into Della’s. He waved her over and she happily sat down in the empty seat in front of him. He always enjoyed her company and often felt guilty about the way Reed treated her. From the day he met her, he regarded her as his sister, that’s why watching Reed walk all over her feelings hurt him as well.

“Look at you.” Casey beamed his way. “You look terrific Caleb. Keep doing what you’re doing.”

“I’m trying.” Was Caleb’s honest response. “And how are you Casey?”

Casey thought about that for half a second and then offered, “I’m good.”

Caleb looked at her and he could see the veiled attempt at forced happiness. He knew her better than to accept the fake smile on her face.

“But you could be better, right?” she smiled a weak smile at him. It always came to this, “Casey, You are an incredible person and I am so glad that my brother has you in his corner. But I hate to see you like this. I would much prefer to see you happy, really happy; even if that means, no Reed. I hate to be the one to say this, because I love him too, but, he’ll probably never be what you need him to be.”

She was still holding on to her silly teenaged fantasy of Reed. “I know,” Casey whispered softy. “Tell that to my heart.”

No matter what happened between her and Reed she could always confide in Caleb. They had become brother and sister almost instantly, when she moved into the lodge. He helped her with Reece without hesitation and he was always there with his shoulders or tissues whenever she needed it. Casey valued his opinions and sought his council on all things Reed. Today he was being honest with her, in the past he would have danced around the obvious, she needed to move on.

Casey sat back into the booth’s vinyl and sighed. “I have this wonderful new man in my life who wants to move on to the next step in our relationship and I can’t let go of the past. My brain is screaming that I give Brian a chance but my heart; my heart won’t let Reed go. I’ve tried so hard to forget about him but I just can’t.”

“I know how you feel. I love him too, but since I’ve been home these past few months, I’ve realized that I need to distance myself from him, at least until he cleans up. It’s hard, he’s my best friend.” Caleb offered; understanding exactly what Casey was feeling.

Reed had them both under his spell. “I keep waiting for the day when he says enough is enough and that he wants to get clean for good, for you and Reece and for him too. I hope that it would have happened by now, but... ”

“I guess Reed has made us both fools in love, huh?” Casey joked.

“Yeah, I guess so.” Caleb thought wistfully.

“Enough about Reed. What about you Caleb. You deserve to be happy too?” Casey reached for his hands for comfort. “In all of the years that I’ve known you, you’ve never really had anyone special in your life. Why is that?”

“I guess, I never really saw myself as anything special; so I never had a need to share my life with anyone else.”

“Are you kidding? You’re a great catch. You are sweet and caring. Children love you. You have your own business and if that isn’t enough just, one look into those baby blues of yours can melt any woman on the spot. There aren’t too many women I know would say no to you if you looked their way.”

Caleb stared at her blankly for half a second, then burst into a thunderous laugh at Casey’s words.

“I mean it, you’re gorgeous.” Caleb continued to laugh as Casey relayed all of the whisperings of his handsomeness by female onlookers whenever he was around. “I’m serious; all the women at church think so too. The ladies at the bank, Wal-Mart…”

“Really?” Caleb grinned, “I mean I know that I’m not an ogre or anything but gorgeous…” he shook his head in disbelief.

“It’s true. You’ve been describe as devastatingly beautiful, for a man.” Casey teased and smiled when she saw Caleb blush.

“Wow…ok.” was all Caleb could manage for a response.

“Caleb, despite all of your life’s obstacles, you are still the sweetest, most considerate person I know, you should be sharing your life with someone. You’ve taken on Reed’s problem as your own, but you don’t have to anymore, you deserve to have your own life and not worry about his struggles.”

Casey stopped herself. She didn’t want to talk about Reed anymore. And she certainly didn’t want to get emotional in front of him. Caleb had seen it enough times; and every time he told her if that’s what she needed to get over his brother, so be it. “Without your friendship, I don’t know where I would be right now. I just want you to have a happy life too…”

The one thing that Casey had come to value in the past years was the kindness that Ernest and Caleb showed her. They loved her; she had no doubts about that. And it pained them too, to watch her sunshine wither away waiting for Reed to come around. Caleb gave her hand a light squeeze and told her that he felt the same about her.

“Oh and don’t get me started on that voice…the ladies go nuts over it.” She joked, attempting to lighten both of their moods, “Which reminds me I need a partner for the Festival of Saints in a few weeks.”

“No, oh no…” Caleb protested, his church singing days were over.

“Come on Caleb, you are the best duet partner that I’ve ever sang with.”

“No. you can go pour all that sugar on someone else, you conned me into doing it that twice already...never again.”

Casey smiled; she was trying to butter him up. She always said that he had natural talent. “You have to admit, we did sound pretty amazing.”

He smiled, remembering that Sunday evening service. “Yes, we did.”

Caleb noticed the sparkle return to her eyes as she talked about signing and hoped that Casey could find a way to be truly happy, without Reed. Sitting there watching her it hit him. He wanted what Reed had. He wanted a family of his own. He sat and listened to Casey prattle on about Reece and her adventures and was comforted when her whole demeanor changed at the mention of her daughter.

“You should smile more, it looks great on you.”

“Thanks. I’ll smile all you want if you agree to sing with me at the festival.” She bargained in a sing song voice.

Caleb laughed, “You’re good. Just for you…I’ll think about it.”

Casey couldn't help but jump up and hug him over the table. They could both use a little joyful noise in their lives.

The pair sat and chatted for a while, each thinking that is was such a wonderful feeling to be able to sit and it have a light hearted conversation with someone else. It was well into the late afternoon before they parted company; but not before agreeing that they should check in with each other more often and if their schedules allowed, they would meet for either lunch or dinner.

*******************************

Casey put the last batch of cookies in the plastic containers and put the last set of cupcake in the refrigerator before turning off the kitchen lights. Dance classes ran later than usual, forcing her to stay up and finish the treats that Reece wanted to take to school tomorrow.

Setting the alarm, Casey’s hands brushed against the picture of Reed holding Reece right after her delivery. He was such a nervous dad that it was too cute for words. The nurses found it endearing and all rushed to give him a crash course on all things newborn. She smiled thinking back, how he instantly went into protector mode after that morning. She couldn’t help but smile at the picture, taken nearly 8 years ago. That moment seemed like a life time ago.

As Casey was walking to turn out the lights in the living room, another image caught her eye. The picture that was propped up next to a more recent picture of Reece was one that she had not seen in a very long time.

‘How did this get down here?’ Probably Ms. Nosey Rosy Reece she laughed to her herself. It was an old photo of her dressed to the nines as Miss Georgia. Crown, sash and at least 20 pounds lighter. That was her first and only official photo taken, before she resigned her crown and started her new life in this small town. She sighed as she remembered the night she was crowned. She was ready to take on the world. Little did she know how much her life was really about to change. Her life here wasn’t bad; it just wasn’t what she ever expected it to be.

For starters, she expected that she and Reed would have married, many years ago. He told her they could get married they day she moved in with him, but she wanted to wait until after Reece was born. In retrospect she had yet to decide if that in itself was a blessing or a curse. Because the Reed she interacted with now, was not the Reed she fell in love with and a marriage to him, would be nothing short of devastation. So why after eight years of hoping and wishing and constantly being disappointed by Reed, did she never pack up and move away? It was simple her heart wouldn’t allow her to give up on Reed.

She thought about what Caleb said earlier about finding happiness without Reed. He had some valid points. The years were rolling by and she was perpetually on hold waiting for him. Why?

Casey knew that there was nothing really keeping her here, in Perry County, she had full custody of their daughter, she had completed her degree and she had saved enough money to Atlanta or anywhere else with Reece and could do whatever she wanted. Brian pointed out much the same tonight and asked her to consider moving with him to Savannah, as his wife.

To say she was stunned by his proposal was an understatement; they had been friends for nearly four years but had only been dating for about 9 months. She felt that is was too soon for such a big step, especially considering that she loved Brian but she was not in love with him. She never hid that fact from him, Casey knew better than anyone how it felt to love someone who didn’t love you back. But Brian wasn’t deterred by her confession; he insisted that he had enough love in his heart for the both of them.

Those were the sweetest words she’d heard in a long time, and it had her thinking. Maybe it was time to move on from Reed and this place; and to finally share her life with someone who loved her. Yes, Reece would miss her daddy, papa and Uncle Caleb, but perhaps a new start in a new place with Brian would give Casey a chance at having true happiness. Besides, what was the point of pining away for a man who went out of his way to avoid her?

**************************

Caleb watched as Reed dragged the last of the timber to the staging area for transport. Pop still insisted that the cabins were mostly built at the lodge and then reassembled at the homeowner’s site. It was twice as much work to do so. But that was always the way EJ Manning Custom Builds did it. Reed told him that it was something Pop did because when he was first starting out he hated to be gone too long away from his family, working on a custom build. Reassembling a completed structure only took a few days to complete in comparison to a custom build on site which could take weeks or months. Family had always been important to both Pop and his mother and that’s why he still continued the practice today. It allowed his work crew to only be away from their family for a few days.

“Hey, need some help?” Caleb asked as he began stacking logs based on the color coding method they used.

“Yeah, sure.” Reed replied without looking to his brother.

Caleb tried to engage Reed is small talk in an attempt to get a feeling for his mood. He was treading lightly with his brother, but he needed to also speak his piece. He knew better than to think Reed would actually engage him in the conversation about his habit, but Caleb was hoping that he would at least listen to his concerns and that was all he could ask for, right now.

“I noticed that you didn’t come home last night again. Are you on, again?” Caleb asked, though he already knew the answer to his question.

“Not today, Caleb I’ve got a lot of shit on my mind and a lot of work to do.”

Reed fixed his gaze to wander over the lake behind Caleb. He wasn’t in the mood for this. He loved his brother dearly, but he didn’t want to hear about how he needed to get his shit together for the people he loved. He already knew that, he already wanted that. He just had difficulty getting there.

“Listen, just hear me out ok.”

“Fuck…you want to do this right now?” Reed yelled, “What do you want to say, Caleb? Tell me something that I haven’t heard already. ‘Cause I’ve heard it all before. ‘Put that stuff down’, ‘we love you’. ‘Your life doesn’t have to be this screwed up.’”

Reed continued to ramble as Caleb stood with his mouth agape. “What? Am I close? Listen I’m glad you got that shit outta your life...”

“Reed” Caleb shouted cutting his brother off in the middle of his tirade. “I’m not here to tell you what you should do with your life, but I am here to tell you that I can’t watch you destroy yourself anymore.”

Caleb watched his brother for some type of reaction, a change in facial expression, relaxed posture, a sound, anything. But Reed stood still staring at the lake and seemed to be unaware that his brother was still talking. Caleb wasn’t sure if Reed was still listening to him, but he knew that he couldn’t give up just yet.

“I have no idea what eats at you so much, that the only way that you can cope is by using. I don’t know what plagues your thoughts, because you’ve never shared it. But I can tell you, I’m here waiting on you to make the smart decision, the right decision for our family and I want to help you, just tell me what you need.”

At Caleb’s last statement, Reed did react to his brother’s words. He ran a hand over his stubbled face then turned to walk to the edge of the lake, where he sat down on the moist ground. He fished in his pocket for his cigarettes and quickly lit one. He didn’t want to think about this today.

“I need you to just leave me alone. I need everyone to just leave me alone. Can you do that?”

For Reed getting clean was much more than checking into rehab or working a 12 step program. He’d already done that, more than once. This was about finally finding the courage to face his demons and let go of the pain that had been griping his soul for as long as he could remember.

Caleb followed his brother and hoped that his words were reaching Reed. “You know I can’t do that. My concern is not only for you but it is also for Reece and Casey.”

He was right. At the mention of Casey and Reece’s names Reed shoulders slumped and he hung his head. Caleb was there by his side with his arm around his brother in an instant.

“I know how much you love them, bro; but you gotta see that fighting you for your love is draining Casey. It’s sucking the life out of her. And I know that you don’t want that. You’ve gotta beat this, not just for you. But for them too.”

********************************

Reed stared at the house that he bought for him and Casey two years after Reece was born. Sitting in his truck, Reed surveyed the neighborhood. The house was a quaint 3 bedroom bungalow that sat in the garden district of their quiet small town. It was an old historic home that he got for a steal with Pop’s help. He thought it that it would be the perfect house for Reece to grow up in, with its big back yard that was perfect to fill with every playground toy, gizmo and gadget he could find. After growing up on the lake, with trees and greenery, Reed knew that Reece would love an expanse space to run around and explore.

Though he knew that Casey and Reece would have preferred to be living at the lodge house with him, Pop and Caleb, like they did when Reece was first born, he thought it best that they have their own space.

In truth, he didn’t want Casey and Reece around when he was truly at his worst and she didn’t fight him on it. It broke her heart to see him so messed up and no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t let go of his habit. Not even for them.

The conversation between him and Caleb had been working overtime in his head. What Caleb said wasn’t new to his ears but the words pierce his soul just the same. He just needed some more time to straighten out his life.

Caleb asked him, how could he still want to hang around all of those skanky girls, he was always with, when he had such a wonderful person waiting for him at home. He wanted to tell his brother that being with those women was easy; they were interchangeable, he wasn’t vested in any of them. But his Star, was just that a star. A bright luminous point in his otherwise dark existence, leading him, guiding him to the life he wanted. Whether she realized it or not, knowing that she was there for him helped him get through many difficult days. For him, she was everything, yet he treated her like nothing. How was that possible? Reed didn’t want to explore it, every time he did, he hated himself even more.

Checking the time on his cell phone, Reed debated whether to call her or not. Call her and say what he asked himself as he sat in his truck that was parked one house over. He had developed this crazy little habit of driving past the house at night, sometimes stopping and watching for hours from his truck. It was just to make sure that Casey and Reece were safe at home; at least that’s what he kept telling himself.

10:15. He knew that Casey was probably still awake. Brian had dropped her off not that long ago. He wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but the fact that she was dating Brian bothered him. He didn’t have a right to feel that way, not after everything that he put her through; but still knowing that she was no longer his, left him feeling anxious and sad.

Our life wasn’t supposed to be like this. But what else what would it be like? Reed argued with himself. We were supposed to be married and happy. But she wanted to wait. Yes, but only until after Reece was born. Reece is almost 8. Why would she marry you now, when all you do is push her away? I don’t always push her away. No, you’re right. The few times when you aren’t stoned, you are at least polite to her. I just…I can’t let her and my daughter, see me like this. So stop it; stop hurting them. That sounded so easy to his ears, if only his will was as compliant.

************************

Caleb closed the door quietly knowing that any slight sound from the heavy pine doors would disturb Ernest. But to his surprise Pop was still sitting behind the desk in his home office. Files and spreadsheets where strewn everywhere and Pop was looking at his computer, scratching his head.

“Pop, what are you still doing up?”

“Still working on the stupid books. I have to meet with Leland for our quarterly meeting, in a few days. And he is one CPA who is a stickler for the rules.”

“I told you a long time ago that you needed help. It’s too much for you now. The business is much bigger than it was when you first started out, Pop. Hire someone to do that stuff.”

“I know, I need to. Casey usually helps me out but I hate to have her comer over when Reed…..”

“I know what you mean.” Caleb stated.

“Well let me at least try to help you.” Caleb grabbed the manila folders that were strewn about tried to make sense of his father’s system.

“Thanks, son.” Ernest replied, surprised that Caleb was just now heading to bed. “And why are you still up. It’s not like you be up after midnight.”

“I just started carving and I was on a roll. When it flows…”

Pop smiled at him in understanding, “Which reminds me, Julius Lindy wants to see your portfolio before he leaves on Friday.”

“What!” Caleb screamed. “Julius Lindy, the music guy?”

“Yes sir, the same one. Judging from the look on your face, I guess I forgot to tell you this, huh?”

“Yes, you did.”

Pop shrugged his shoulders and went back to his spreadsheet. “Apparently he is friends with Lyle Eshebrooke and saw some your pieces in one of Lyle’s mountain retreats and wants to commission several pieces for his lodge.”

Caleb’s thoughts were going a mile a minute about the possibility of designing for Julius Lindy. “Damn, I don’t have a portfolio.”

“Well you better put one together; he is coming down to see the work on his cabin, Friday morning.”

“I guess I need to call Casey and ask for her help with that too.” Caleb laughed to himself; he knew exactly what her help was going to cost him. He made a mental note to call Casey in the morning, but not before he ran down a list of songs that he would agree to sing with her, in his head.

“That would be smart,” Pop laughed, but his manner quickly changed to serious. “Caleb, this is a great opportunity for you. Don’t blow it.”

“I won’t.” Caleb promised sifting through another file.

*********************

Casey jumped at the sound that invaded her sleep. It sounded like steps coming down the hallway; she opened her eyes, slightly alarmed and was surprised to see him sitting in the chair next to bed.

“Reed? What are you doing here?”

Reed didn’t answer her; he sat and stared at her reclined form. Without saying a word, he pulled off his shirt and crawled into bed next to her. Planting a soft tentative kiss on her lips, he murmured into the darkness, “I…I miss you.”

Casey didn’t move. She was in shock, it was dark and she couldn’t tell if Reed was high or not. “How did you get in?”

“My key.” The key that you may have used twice in 5 years? Casey wanted to ask him but didn’t. “You never use that key, you always knock on the door; like everyone else.”

“I didn’t want to wake Reece up.”

“And the alarm code?”

“The day we met.” Reed wasn’t high, he was very aware of what he was doing. She had never given him the alarm code. He propped himself on one arm and ran his hands down Casey’s body.

“Don’t…don’t do that.”

“Why?”

“Just don’t...ok”

“Are you sleeping with him?”

“What?”

“That clown Brian, are you sleeping with him.” Reed asked, his eyes never leaving hers. He desperately needed to hear the truth.

“That isn’t any of your business…” Casey countered, surprised by his question.

“Not my business….everything about you is my business, Star.” Reed shouted, forgetting that it was so late and their daughter was in the next room asleep.

“Ssh, before you wake Reece up…”

“Answer me…”

“You really shouldn’t be in here.” Casey evaded, “If she wakes up and sees you here it will send her the wrong message.”

“What wrong message? That her parents love each other?” Reed asked pulling Casey closer to him.

Kissing Casey’s neck, Reed nudged her legs wider. “Reed…”Casey warned, when she felt his fingers caress the inside of her thighs.

“Damn it Star…why? Why do you do this to me? Why do you make me so crazy, baby?”

“Me?” Casey wanted to scream as she sat up, pushing Reed off her body. She blew out a breath in frustration.

“How can you say that to me, after everything that you’ve put me through?” Casey reminded, “You have some nerve…get out.”

“Why are you torturing me, baby? I hate seeing you with him.” Casey stopped fighting his movements and stilled to look into Reed’s eyes. Was he out of it? No. He wasn’t high, he was serious.

“And I hate seeing you with your cheap sluts, but that has never stopped you. Not once.” Casey replied, wishing her tears away.

Reed eased his body on top of Casey, kissing the tracks of tears that rolled down her cheeks. “Look at me Star, there is no one else for me except you, no one.”

Casey wanted to tell him to stop, just go away, leave her alone and stop tormenting her. She knew her limits and it would be hard to stop Reed from lighting the flame that she was so sure had burned out between them years ago.

“I lose my mind thinking about him holding you and kissing. When all I want to do is to hold you and kiss you, myself.” Reed’s lips hovered over her face, moving closer to her, he began kissing around her jawline and ear. “It drives me crazy, when I see you with him.”

“Don’t Reed. Don’t tease me like this….why are you here?” she asked swatting his hands away from her face.

“I miss us, Star.” Reed replied simply as his lips descended on hers, covering her mouth in a thousand kisses.

His warm body crushed into of hers and she readily accepted his long overdue tenderness. Against her better judgment, Casey relaxed into his warmth and was hypnotized by the look in his pale blue eyes. This was her Reed; the one who held her as she cried over the positive results of her pregnancy tests and pledged his love and support forever. This was the man she had been waiting on all these years. Had been? Then it hit her.

“Reed we can’t do this, Brian...”

Reed wasn’t hearing her. He swallowed her words with his lips, as he began kissing her full lips and teasing her tongue with his. “Forget about him Casey.”

Casey moaned as she felt his mouth and tongue massaging hers. He was dominating her, owning her and after years of wishing for just that, her body quickly yielded to Reed’s touch. She felt his long slender fingers brush against her already moist center and before she could stop his roaming hands, she was lost to all the sensations he was producing. But just as quickly as she was lost in the moment, she suddenly found herself pulling away and attempting to push Reed off of her.

“Stop! He, he asked me to marry him…he wants Reece and I to move to Savannah with him. I, I told him that I would think about it, but I am going to tell him, yes.”

Reed stilled his movements and stared into her wet eyes. She was crying and so was he, on the inside. Star had no idea the hell that she had just ushered him into by revealing that Brian wanted to marry her. It hurt him. But in a way he deserved it. It was his payback for everything that he put her through. He could never find the words to tell her what she and Reece meant to him. But worse he couldn’t stop using, long enough to show her.

He pulled her face forward and kissed her; really kissed her. The way he did, when they were younger. Reed hated to see the sadness and hurt that lingered in her beautiful brown eyes, knowing that he was the source of such pain. Why couldn’t he love her and make her happy the way they both wanted him to? Reed held her tightly and fought his own aching feelings, as he felt her wet face lodged into his neck. He let her have her cry for what seemed like an eternity, but was no longer than a few minutes. He couldn’t accept her marrying someone else or his family moving away; he couldn’t take that.

“I love you Star, please don’t…leave me baby.” He blurted out, surprising them both. Reed had not told Casey he loved her in a long time.

“Reed…I…”

“Please, don’t leave me, Star. I promise, I’ll do better.” Reed cried. Casey was shocked to see the tears in his eyes. He cared, his tears told her so. Reed was never emotional and she didn’t know how to respond to it. His soft kisses landed all over her neck and face and the sensations of their feathered touch sent a shiver though her body.

“Don’t go, if you and Reece left me…I’ll just die.” Reed confessed, looking into her eyes.

“Don’t talk like that.” A scared Casey sobbed, as she stared back at Reed.

“I know I will. You’re the only reasons why I haven’t killed myself, yet.” Casey was so shocked to see the pain that was in his eyes, and to hear the agony in his words; it frightened her.

“Oh god Reed, don’t say that…” Casey cried, feeling the sobs moving through his body. “Don’t even think that.” She begged, pulling him closer to her.

“It’s true baby, if you and Reece leave me…”

‘We won’t…” Casey cut off. “I promise you, we won’t leave you.” She kissed his wet face and held him close to her heart. They held each other that way for the rest of the night without further words and only their tears exchanged between them.

--------------

Reed didn’t sleep. When he wasn’t in bed holding Casey close to him, he was watching Reece sleep. When Casey told him that that other man wanted to take his place in their lives, the possessiveness he felt over his girls nearly overpowered his good sense. There was no way he was going to let some other man claim his family.

His feelings for Casey had always scared him; and as scared as her was over those feelings, his hope to be her great love again somehow trumped it. With the dawn of a new day, he knew that he had to make the right decisions that would keep his family here with him. He wouldn’t last another day without them, not anymore.

------------------------

As her body eased awake, Casey’s eyes fluttered open as she searched the room for Reed. She ran her and over the empty space next to her finding that the sheets were cool; which meant he’d left some time ago.

Her heart sank as she pulled the sheet higher to cover her trembling body. Burning tears of frustration hovered on her eye lids and she willed them away. Why did she have to be so weak when it came to Reed? No more. She would be weak for him no more.