“Why am I here?”

“We both know why…”

And so their conversation had began as the last rays of the sun were started to drift under the blue horizon. As the hours ticked by a battle had raged within her as to whether she should meet him by the pier or not. Matilda promised to cover for her absence and had also advised that she mustn’t take the affair between them too seriously.

In two months he would go back to England to marry Emilie and you can go on with Will. 

Matilda was right of course but her heart was sending off blaring alarm bells. Yet she stood with her back turned away clutching her black shawl tightly.

Only for a little while longer could he go on with this game. Ever since his arrival inside the pimento hut she had retreated from his grasp refusing to look at him squarely.

“So how were you able to escape Emilie’s hold?”

“I’ve always had my way and you know that to be true.”

“A way to get what you want…”

“And what I desperately need…,” he said seductively. “I love the way your hair looks,” slowly he was creeping by where her feet stood firmly planted.

“It’s unlike your fiancée’s long, flowing, black hair.”

“Do you believe that beauty is judged by the hair…the skin…?” She could hardly breathe as he invaded her personal space intentionally playing with some of her wayward strands which hung loosely around her shoulders.

“The English judge beauty differently than others do,” she swallowed and then looked past his shoulder at the purling river. Dependent on the tide its color would change from dark blue, to green or dark brown.

Maybe it was being out here with the Brodie Estate within striking distance or her early morning quarrel with Ms. Diana but Eliza’s behavior was unlike the woman from the night before.

“Come with me,” he said caressing her neck.

“Where are you going to take me?” Ah those chocolate, brown eyes were finally staring back at him although with a questioning glare. He meant to keep their gaze but he had to respond.

“Once again you need to trust me.”

He took her by hand and helped her over the side of the boat. It rocked a little and she fell back against his body. She was in his arms and he hoped that it wouldn’t be for the last time that evening. Reluctantly he let her go and took his place at the helm of the boat – they had to reach their destination before the darkness of the night was upon them.

The river was an integral fabric of the Bay, without it the forestry industry would have failed a longtime ago. James and his Uncle Arthur had taught him from an early age how to navigate its murky waterway filled with debris from floating mahogany and sprouting mangroves.

“Are you ok?” She was being far too silent sitting behind him.

“It’s like you are taken me into a fantasy from years past,” she said trying to secure some of her flailing hair behind her ear. He smiled at her deduction – she knew exactly where he was taken her.

It was to a house that his father had built many years ago and his mother had outwardly rejected fearing it was too far away from town. James hated that he had to leave it unoccupied so he employed Mr. Edward and his wife Ms. Selene to be its caretakers. The couple lived on an adjoining property but made sure that the residence was kept in proper order…one never knew when Mr. Brodie might appear for a quick visit.

Drake often wondered why his father held the property so dear. It was a smaller-scaled version of the Brodie Estate and could have been sold many times at different prices but James refused all offers. His father held many other properties but this plot seemed to be his most prized possession.

Drake could count the amount of times he had been taken there and Eliza remembered that she had been there three times in her life. She had marveled at the gardens. It reminded her of scenes from some of the books that Drake had read to her.

The land that Mr. Edward and his wife lived on was gifted to him by Mr. Brodie as a reward for taking care of his property so dutifully. He was the only black man she knew that was able to own and farm his own plot of land.

“Mr. Drake Brodie, glad to see you made it back safely.” A tall man with broad shoulders and a gapped tooth grin shook Drake’s hand warmly.

So he had been here earlier…Eliza was carefully hidden by the bow of the boat.

“I told you that I would return.”

“Mr. Edward, if my father asks, tell him that I was never here. You know how he can be about anyone of us visiting this place alone.”

“This place is very dear to your father’s heart. It was his dream and your mother’s nightmare.” Mr. Edward paused then asked. “Drake how is your mother?”

“Sadly, she’s still the same.”

“Indeed that is very sad. Well I’m off to bed. Selene has already prepared everything so I believe you’ll be very comfortable.”

“I thank you and your wife very much.”

“Mr. Edward, when have you ever stayed up later than usual?”

“My wedding night…for obvious reasons,” he chuckled as he walked away.

“You may come now,” he motioned to Eliza.

“These gardens are still as beautiful as I remembered them…just look at those roses and the hibiscuses and look at that huge Zericote tree.” She reminisced one time in her earlier years when she ran through the endless rows of flowers.

Drake grabbed her hand as she walked past him pulling her into a kiss.

“Do you not notice me?”

“Far too often these days,” she said returning his kiss. Now this was the Eliza he wanted. “I see that being on the island has given you back the color I recall so well.” His skin was exhibiting a nice golden brown hue.

“Finally she notices. I did it all for you.”

“I wonder what else you may have done for me this evening.”

“You’ll see once we go inside.”

First stop on their walk through was the candle lit dining room where a bowl of hearty beef and vegetable stew awaited along with a glass and a bottle of red wine.

“One has to eat before proceeding to other delights.”

“I’ve noticed that there is only one place setting. I cannot see myself obtaining another spoon and awaiting my turn,” Eliza complained.

“Women’s minds can be so circular in thought. Eliza there’s only going to be one spoon available.”

“Oh…so you intend to feed me or is it the other way around.”

“Whatever is your pleasure, my lady,” he bowed kissing the back of her hand. Being there and Drake’s mannerisms made her feel giggly.

“I’m famished and it will be my pleasure if you would feed me.”

“Do request another wine glass as well.”

“Given your service towards me one wine glass will serve the purpose.”

“Your wish is my command,” he whispered as his hands encircled her waist and they kissed.

15 minutes later…  

“Hmmm…this is very palatable. All the flavors blend together so delightfully.”

“Real English cooking doesn’t compare to this experience.”

“I wonder what you will do when you return.”

“Who knows I may never return,” he said sipping his wine as he gazed at her intently. “Do you recall when I asked you one day what you really wanted most in the world?”

“You couldn’t possibly be speaking about…” Drake nodded his head. “We were just children and I didn’t believe that you would actually obtain it for me.”

“You asked for a doll exactly like Sara’s little Ms. Ann doll.”

“I really loved its blue and white dress and matching bonnet. I was totally surprised when I actually received the same dolly. And why was this so Mr. Brodie?” her eyes twinkled as she took a sip of his wine.

“Because It may have been Sara’s after all,” he shrugged, “I loved the way she threw a tantrum when she found that it was missing. If I had asked father about buying me a doll he would have wondered if something was wrong with me so I had to do the next best thing.” They both giggled. “Do you still have it?”

“It’s tucked amongst my precious little treasures.” Then she quickly remembered. “I’m so sorry Drake,” she sighed, “I lost the locket that you gave to me.”

“Eliza you didn’t lose it. I found it last night.”

“Then why didn’t you say something earlier,” she smacked him playfully.

“Ouch…that stings…,” he chuckled. “I’ll give it back to you once it’s repaired.”

“You have no idea how my heart ached over losing it.”

“Then I’ll tell your heart to be still. There are better things for your heart to ache over.” 

The mood was beginning to change as they took their last bites.

“Eliza since our last conversation I feared that we wouldn’t be talking like this again. I love being around and talking to you. You place my mind at ease. It is only around you that I can be my true self.”

“Then why did you stay away so long? I missed you terribly. You were my escape from the doldrums of endless servitude.”

If he really thought about it there really wasn’t a very good explanation for his long absence but he would try.

“It was an error that I promise never to repeat again,” he said clasping her hands, “life in the Bay functions at a slower pace than in England. Regretfully I got caught in trying to establish my situation.”

“And other matters…”

“Yes and other matters,” he said rising from the table. “I couldn’t believe my eyes when I first saw you again.”

“Why?” she asked as he pulled out her chair. She turned and placed her arms around his neck. His arms in turn encompassed her curvy thighs.

“You had changed a great deal…maturing into an alluring woman.”

“You are a rather handsome looking gentleman yourself.”

“There are times that I can behave quite gentlemanly,” he whispered teasing her lips with his. He squeezed her thighs and she felt his manhood steadily rising. “And then there are times that I just want to take a woman to passion’s peak.”

Eliza’s mind was lost. With eyes closed she delighted in his tongue caressing her neck and his fingers playing with her erect areoles hidden beneath her dress.

He heard her moan as he grounded his sex against her center. “I delight in giving you pleasure.”

“I delight in receiving that pleasure,” she sighed feeling a wetness coating her inner thighs.

This foreplay was meant to continue upstairs so with candle in hand he led her to the bedroom.

Whether it was his or not she did not know but it looked very elegant and dreamy illuminated by the light of the full moon hovering outside their window. The bed, with its carved uprights and soft bedding was surrounded by sheer mosquito netting.

Slowly they undressed and she gazed into his eyes asking, “Am I in a dream?”

“If it is a dream then it will be many hours before you are awaken,” he said capturing her lips.

When passion’s flames burn brightly the passage of time is inconsequential. It has no bearing when love overtakes the heart and soul.

What more could he do to express his feelings but through touch and words that she had never heard a man speak towards her. He whispered words of her beauty; of his longing to be close to her…moving inside of her...together as one. As she reached her desired climax, for a moment, she felt that he belonged to her completely. It took great effort for him to pull away from her as he reached his own zenith. His sweat covered body plopped down beside her as they both fought to recover normal breathing.

“Eliza…my Eliza…are you still dreaming?”

“I’m wide awake still feeling you inside of me.”

After tender moments passed… 

The candle that was once new had burned down to half its length. Drake lied on his stomach watching a peaceful Eliza who rested on her side gazing back at him.

“You do realize that there is more to us than just a physical attraction.”

It would come to this and she was fearful of where it might lead.

“It’s because we are also close friends.”

“And much more Eliza…,” he whispered softly, “Will you allow me to say it?”

“Drake please I don’t want to hear it. It is better that things remain as they are.”

“I understand your fear…”

“Do you…really…” He could see the pain in her eyes. “Until you walk around in this skin you will never understand my fear.”

“I know that you do not fault me for the color of my skin and being who I am. I truly do not understand your anger towards me.”

 “The world always revolves around Drake Brodie and damn the rest of us!”

“Eliza have I ever done anything to intentionally hurt you?!”

“No but you are going to hurt me…unintentional though it may be.”

“Therefore I’m hurting you by saying that I’m falling in love with you.”

What did he just say? She gazed deeply into those blue eyes and judged him to be sincere. She still didn’t want to believe it…this couldn’t be happening…

“What is so wrong with me loving you?” he asked…hurt.

“Everything…it can never be,” she said shaking her head. He had to hear the truth and not allow this fantasy to continue although she felt awful hurting him as she was.

“Could you love me Eliza?”

“If we were the same I could easily love you. Society allows us to carry on affairs but not to develop any sort of emotional connection.”

“I don’t care about society and how they view us as being different people. I care about you and me. As we lie here and on the bonds of our friendship, Eliza, do you love me?”

“I really don’t know how to respond to your question Drake.”

He could see it in her eyes. He was forcing his own need upon her and it wasn’t fair to Eliza. He let out a breath and loving caressed her arm. “I didn’t bring you here to cause you any further distress.” She smiled and held his hand kissing it sweetly. “Regardless of your feelings towards me we will forever remain friends.”

Their discourse and his sincere words of love had caused her firm stand to weaken. Of course he had the courage to tell her about his love for her but what were her true feelings towards him. She had to search her soul and there she found the answer.

“We are far beyond friendship.” Drake’s body stiffened as he anxiously awaited her next utterance. “With everything that is within me…I do love you Drake Brodie.”

“My Love!”

Eager tongues battled to gain control of a kiss that started off passionately and ended romantic.

“The first time my eyes came across your beautiful face in the kitchen, I fell in love with you.”

“Those are the scariest words that I have ever spoken.”

“I know you are afraid. I’m scared too. I didn’t plan on coming back home and falling in love with another woman.”

“Oh no…Will…”

“You are not still planning on marrying him?” he asked in a jealous tone.

“He doesn’t deserve to be put aside.”

“And neither does Emilie but I cannot live my life pretending that I love her when I obviously I do not!”

“What happened to love and practicality? We cannot build anything on our love…only unattainable dreams.”

“Unattainable Dreams…” Her words struck his heart deeply. “Everything that has occurred between us is just a fantasy to you.”

“You are not a fantasy to me.”

“I might as well be. I pour out my heart to you and I express my love for you and yet…” He turned away and quickly arose from the bed unable to face her hurt as he felt. “I believe it’s best that we never speak to one another again.”

“I thought that we would forever remain friends,” she said dejected.

“I told you an untruth. How do you expect me to react when the woman I love is going to marry someone else? You may be willing to see me with Emilie but I’m unwilling to see you in another man’s arms.”

“You’ll still have my heart,” she pleaded.

“It’s not enough. I want you. I want us to be together.”

“We had better leave this place before we hurt each other further.”

“It’s best for the both of us,” she agreed.

They bathed and dressed separately. Eliza wanted to cry but she wasn’t going to allow him to see any tears being shed. Why couldn’t he understand that even though they were in love that it would be ill-fated? Drake could be stubborn when he wanted to and so could she.

Homeward Bound… 

The moon hung in the sky above and the forest animals could be heard in the background but neither cared. Their burgeoning love affair had quickly ended and all that remained was hurt emotions. Drake skillfully steered the boat and soon he arrived at the back of the estate where he helped her disembark. He bade her goodnight and they glared at each other momentarily…then he was gone. Now she could cry. 

She walked slowly to the house feeling numb and foolish.

“I should have followed Matilda’s advice and not allowed it to go so far and now where am I…”

Entering the kitchen she saw Matilda drumming her fingers on the table awaiting her return. Matilda would have scolded for her late arrival but seeing her despondency she quickly changed her approach.

“Eliza what wrong?” When she didn’t answer Matilda saw her fragile condition. She went to her side and held her. “Come on I’ll take you to your room.”

Upon arrival to her room Eliza crawled into her bed curling up against her pillow.

“If you don’t want to talk then you don’t have to.”

“Matilda I’ve lost him,” she said sadly.

“You lost Drake? Where? That why you were crying?”

“I never follow your advice.” Eliza touched her heart illustrating what she really meant.

“Oh…you two had a fight.”

“He loves me.”

“He what?”

“And I love him…”

“You what?” This was too much information for Matilda to handle all at once and she decided to lie down next to her. “Never know you two so heavily involved like that but I do see the problem.”

“He doesn’t want to see that we can’t be together and now he don’t even want to be my friend. I guess it all for the best.”

“What will you do when you see him again?”

“I don’t know…probably nothing…just turn me head and go on bout me business I guess.”

“And when he be with Emilie?”

“Matilda he was never mine. He was always Emilie’s,” she cried.

“Dear…dear Eliza,” she said patting her shoulder.

“I hate feeling this way. I just really hate feeling so lost and confused.”

“I no understand…why you two end up fighting in the first place?”

“Because of Will...,” she said quietly. “I told him that I will still marry Will.”

“A man in love no want hear bout another man.”

“Will was my man before he come back,” she defended. “I can’t break Will’s heart like that.”

Matilda had to admit that Eliza’s situation had gotten far too complicated for her to offer any sage words to assist her friend.

“Eliza this is something that you have to figure out on your own. I can’t really advise you.”

“I know Matilda but I have dealt with nuff in me life. Drake is the least of me troubles. I can get past this unhappiness. When Will comes back Drake would be gone already and life will get back to normal.”

“I just have a feeling that Mr. Drake no will make this slide so easy.”

“I don’t care what he do. I know what I have to do even if it hurt.”

Verandah…

Robert and Gloria were sitting outside on the verandah enjoying the cool of the evening.

“Robert I can’t believe I haven’t seen that witch Eliza around lately.”

“Why you care so much about Eliza?”

“It’s none of your business,” she responded irritated.

“Then don’t ask me about her again.”

“Robert I’m sorry,” she softened. “I’m a bit stressed having to deal with all our guests.”

“And all your extra work.”

Gloria chose to ignore his comment. “I was very happy when Mr. James took everyone to St. George’s.”

“Gloria, what do you want now?”

“Hmmm…nothing really but since you asked…I just want you to take me to Ms. Abigail.”

“Gloria, you crazy!” He looked at her in disbelief.

“I need her to do something for me.”

“You know once you deal with the devil he expect payback.”

“I can handle that as long as I get what I want.”

“What do you want Gloria? Eliza gone…Drake in your bed…”

“I could slap you Robert for saying such things but I still need your help. So will you take me or not?”

“I’ll take you but you must do something for me this time.”

“I’ll do anything.”