Melanie drove down Memorial Boulevard admiring the beauty of Providence on this late December afternoon. The sun was setting over the city casting a faint glow through thin grey clouds. She loved growing up in Providence Rhode Island which led to her not going to New York to study design but staying home to attend The Rhode Island School of Design where she obtained her degree in Interior Architecture. Truthfully, the main reason that she went to RISD was that she and Seth both agreed to stay local. They never wanted to be far from each other. Going to different schools in the same city left them the ability to concentrate on their studies with a sense of independence while always being within reach. Seth went to the University of Rhode Island where he majored in Biology.

Immediately after college Melanie obtained a job as an assistant to internationally known furniture designer that resided locally in Providence. She was able to learn the ins and outs of the industry as well as support herself financially. This fueled her desire for her own interior design firm which she was eventually able to start. Design Within Reach is Melanie’s baby. The business is going much better than she had anticipated. Lauren was great about passing along her business cards to clients that she worked with in Real Estate. Melanie focused on making interior design available to everyone. She wanted to get rid of the notion that it was only for the wealthy or a privileged few. Melanie clicked her wireless earpiece.

“This is Melanie.”

“Hi Sweetheart, how are you?”

Melanie hesitated…should she tell him the truth? Should she tell Tyler she feels like she walked through an episode of the Twilight Zone? Melanie could hear Lauren’s warning of not telling Tyler right away would be a secret that could easily come back to bite her right square in the ass or should she just put today away as a happenstance to be forgotten.

“I am good. Just finishing up some errands for our big day.” Carefully uttering her words not to give any hint of the strain from this afternoon.

“Mrs. Melanie Roberts…I like the sound of that…my wife. It has a nice ring to it.” Melanie knew that Tyler was all smiles on the other end of the phone. A twinge of guilt pierced her heart at the thought of not telling Tyler.

“I like the sound of it too….The next two weeks can’t come fast enough.”

“Is someone getting a little nervous?”

“No just anxious for it to happen…hey how about we elope?” Melanie liked the idea the more she thought about it.

“Let’s just run away…tonight. We could hop a flight to Vegas…have a wedding and honeymoon all in one.” She has never been to Vegas and always wanted to go.

“What??? Are you serious?” Tyler removed the phone from his face to actually look at it. He had a hard time Melanie really wanted to scrap all the plans that they made to just run off and elope at some cheesy chapel with Elvis and a bunch of strangers.

“Yes, I am dead serious. Tonight…married…me and you.”

“What has gotten into you?” Tyler was beginning to think Melanie was serious, if he agreed to it she would happily jump on a red-eye to Vegas to say I do.

“Oh nothing, I just thought that it would be fun…something spontaneous…irresponsible even.” Now that Melanie thought about it…has she ever done anything spontaneous? She had a hard time trying to think of one single time.

“There is no way I am not going to stand at the altar and watch you walk through those church doors on the arm of you father with our family and friends all there to share this day with us. Mel you are just stressed out. I know what you need…something to take your mind off of things. We will kick back and relax tonight over some drinks. How about Capital Grille?”

Melanie sighed thinking that was the end of her bright idea. All of their problems solved…well her problem named Seth Gallagher.

There was no way she was going back to Capital Grille after running into Seth there this afternoon. The last thing she wanted to do was take the chance that he still may be there or anywhere in the surrounding vicinity. It is true what they say that the guilty always return to the scene of the crime.

Melanie closed her eyes at the thought of Tyler and Seth being in the same place at the same time. Tyler was all too familiar with her relationship with Seth. Despite being a small city Providence had the feel of a small town. If you didn’t know most people by name; you knew someone that they were related to or at the least recognized their face.

“How about McFadden’s? I could go some hot wings and a cold beer.” Melanie knew Tyler could not resist McFadden’s buffalo wings.

“Sounds good to me. I am running a little late. I am finishing up editing a story I am working on. I will there as soon as I can.”

“I can’t wait. I will see you there.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Melanie pressed the button on her ear piece ending the call frustrated for not mentioning what happened today. Was she really being honest with herself about not admitting the truth to Tyler? Was it because she really thought of it as something so miniscule it was not worth mentioning or was it something more?

“I am going to tell Tyler about Seth today.” Melanie told herself as she turned on Fountain Drive heading towards McFadden’s.

Seth wasn’t expecting the warmest welcome from Lauren, but her warning to stay away from Melanie hit him harder than he thought. He was sure that the rest of her family felt the same way. Even his own mother was happy for Melanie. Helene Gallagher undoubtedly carried some of the guilt for Seth’s unpredictable and irresponsible actions. His mother and Camille Price were friends the entire time they were dating. Their break-up but some strain on their friendship, but they have managed to stay cordial to each other; with no thanks to Seth.

Seth walked into McFadden’s with every intent to finish what he started this afternoon with his good friend Johnny Walker Black. The comfort of the burn as it slid down his throat eased the pain of knowing that he took for granted the love of his life. His mistake of being careless with life and love made the good fortune for the man that would soon be her husband. Seth thought of Lauren’s question ‘why here…why now?’  No one would believe him if he told them that is intent is not to hurt Melanie. He would easily offer his own life rather than to hurt her any more than he already has. Seth knew this statement was contradictory because his mere presence here back home was already a source of tension and discomfort for Melanie and her family…especially now right before her wedding.

Seth just wants for her to understand why he left those years ago. He needs her to forgive him. They both need closure. He could feel the energy pass between them earlier this afternoon. He could see the hurt and confusion in her eyes as he held her hand. Melanie was no more over him than he was over her.

Seth reasoned to himself the fact that she was engaged to be married to someone else was just repercussions that he would have to deal with…accept no….deal with…yes.

Anyone can move on if the person is completely out of their lives. The true test is seeing that person and still being able to move on. This was a cold hard fact that Seth knew too well. The distance that he placed between himself and Melanie didn’t make him feel whole. The theory that he was losing his identity in Melanie was a lie. He rationalized his moving away with the arguments of ‘we have been together since we were 16. I don’t know who I am as a man. I don’t know what I want or who I want to be.’  What an idiot. All he learned was that the life that he lived without Mel was cold and bland…without meaning.

“Charlie love sucks.” Seth slurred as he tapped his glass on the bar indicating to the bartender Charlie that he needed a refill.

“Seth…how about I get you a nice black cup of java?” Charlie was a tall beefy guy with a bald head and two arms with more blue ink than skin. He had a very intimidating look, but was one of the nicest guys around.

“I need a refill of what I have been drinking is what I need.”

“This is your last one. After this I am going to have to flag you. You have had enough for today.”

“See that’s where you are wrong. I am just getting started.” Please Come Home for Christmas was playing in the background. The bluesy version; everyone knew that Charlie loved the blues. Surprisingly the Blues never depressed Seth the Blues actually made him feel good. This reminded him of Mel’s favorite Christmas song Merry Christmas Baby.  Maybe he could convince Charlie to play it for him for old time’s sake.

“Getting drunk is not going to bring Mel back.” Charlie has seen this scene more times than he can count. Charlie knows both Mel and Seth from their days of coming here their senior year of college and meeting friends here on Friday night for happy hour.

“Does everybody in this town freakin know???”

“This is Providence Seth…there is no such thing as personal business in these parts. Plus Mel and Tyler come in pretty frequently. I know you don’t want to here this but he’s a good guy. She seems happy. Mel deserves that.” Charlie whipped the towel from over his shoulder and proceeded to wipe down his mahogany bar. The tattoo of a voluptuous woman prominently displayed on both his forearms.  “Speak of the devil.”

“Tyler? What kind of idiot is named Tyler?” Seth tilted his head back finishing the shot in one gulp. He remembered how he taught Melanie how to drink shots. He told her she had to learn out to take it to the neck; lean her head all the way back take a deep breath and swallow…voila. The perfect shot. Seth smiled knowing that Mel could drink him under the table. She was petite but powerful. He teased her about having a wooden leg to store all the alcohol she consumed in. Melanie could out drink a line-backer.

Seth turned around to see Mel walk through the door.  Melanie tilted her head to the side as she started laughing. This can not be happening… she thought to herself.

“This can not be freaking happening!” Looking directly at Seth obviously inebriated at the bar.

“You have got to be kidding me right?” Melanie looked at Charlie in amazement.

“Mel if you don’t call him a cab; I am going to have to take his keys. He has been here all afternoon. He is in no condition to drive.” Charlie threw his dish towel over his shoulder.

“How long has he been here?”

“Since a little after four. He is depressing my customers. He’s costing me business.”

Charlie winked at Mel knowing he was giving Seth a well deserved hard time. What do you expect from a small town Melanie thought to herself as she took her seat at the bar. Who in this town didn’t know the two of them and both their families?

“I’ll take care of him…I mean...it. I will take care of it.” Melanie turned to Seth seeing the guilt in his eyes and pain on his face. She convinced herself that she was not going to feel sorry for him; though it was getting increasingly hard.

“What are you doing Seth?” Melanie took off her scarf and let her coat fall across the back of the barstool. She took the glass out of his hand setting on the bar at arms length out of his reach. She and Seth have both gotten drunk before, but she has never seen Seth this drunk or sullen.

“Just having a drink with friends…oh that’s right I don’t have any friends.”

“So what am I suppose to do? Pat you on the back and tell you everything will be ok Seth. I will be your friend. All is forgiven and right with the world. Is that what you want?”

“I can’t have what I want.” He looked at Melanie directly in her eyes slowly lowering them gazing at her breast moving them down over her stomach and stopping at her jeans. Melanie closed her leather blazer and crossed her legs not enjoying the memories of what Seth’s gaze brought up.

“Stop brooding. You are being pathetic coming back here now. What did you think I was going to do Seth? Take one look at you and call the whole thing off. Am I supposed to just forget the past four years? How you just walked out on me? No compromise-not trying to make it work-nothing?  What the hell did you think was going to happen when you came back here?”

“I know sorry is not enough. I didn’t know how to explain that it wasn’t you but me. I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted. I was young and immature. We set ourselves into a routine so young. I felt lost in you. Mel you always knew what you were going to do and be. Me…I was just floating along. I didn’t know how to say that I needed to grow up and be on my own. I didn’t want to hurt you and in the end that is exactly what I did. Not just you but my parents and your family. The more time passed the harder it got to come to terms with what I did and how I handled it. I just need you to forgive me…please…forgive me.”

“I forgave you a long time ago. I wouldn’t have been able to move on to let love in my life if I was still holding on to anger and resentment.” Melanie knew that Seth had to realize and come to terms with the fact that she was with someone else. That in two weeks she would be Tyler’s wife.

“I need to know that you don’t hate me.”

Melanie could feel the sincerity in Seth plea. She could feel the well of hot tears forming. She reached up to catch them before they fell. Melanie’s emotions were a confusing mass of hurt, anger and disappointment. Breaking through those feelings was a sense of relief. Relief in the knowledge that it was not something she did or that Seth didn’t love her anymore. She could finally put to rest the endless speculation of there being someone else or wanting to play the field. Though all was not forgotten; the burden of not knowing had finally been lifted.

Seth’s face suddenly turned an ashen white from being a blushed rosy color a few seconds ago. Seth could feel the room spinning as a wave of heat mixed with nausea ran through him.

“I think I am going to be sick.” Seth leaned over holding his stomach.

Melanie jumped off her chair. She slung Seth arm over her shoulders supporting him with her opposite arm around his waist. She helped him out the door directly to the side alley next to the dumpster. As soon as they reached the side of the dumpster she removed herself from under Seth’s arm. It was weird being so close to him after all this time it felt familiar at the same time as feeling new to her. He smelled of soap and sandalwood. She stood to the side as Seth bent over. She screamed as she jumped back as Seth vomited next to the back end of the dumpster. Seth reached out his hand against the brick wall lowering himself closer to the ground. Seth felt a slight pressure, was that her hand on his back?

He felt like a complete idiot. ‘Good going moron not eating before you down a half of bottle of whiskey.’ Seth chided himself not only did he get sick from drinking too much but he did it in front of Mel.

He didn’t even hear her walk away. He slowly leaned up as Melanie returned with a bucket of steaming hot water and a cold white towel.

“Compliments of Charlie.” She said as she smiled at him. Melanie leaned the bucket down in an attempt to wash away the vomit. Seth took the bucket from her.

“I can clean up my own mess. It seems as though I am doing that a lot lately.” He sheepishly smiled at her knowing he was speaking of what happened between them years ago.  “I don’t want you near this.”

Melanie stepped back as she let Seth wash the remains away. She handed him the towel. It felt like heaven to him. He covered his face with the towel. The fresh cold air brought him back to reality…even if it was one he had not come to accept.

He could see past her to the street as a fluffy blanket of snow covered the street. Really looking at Mel he could see she hasn’t changed all that much in four years. Her eyes were still warm; her smile still contagiously beautiful. Those lips…he called them his gateway to heaven. He always joked with Mel he would tell Ms. Price the things her daughter could do with those lips. The places she could take him. She was wearing her favorite color Cabernet it was a deep, dark red that gave her a sultry look. He knew she probably chose that color for Tyler. Melanie didn’t look older, but he could feel a sense of maturity…maybe strength that he never noticed before. It felt good just being around her.

“Put the towel on your neck. It will make you feel better….I am afraid to ask what brought this on. You probably haven’t eaten all day.” Melanie rebuked herself…there she was taking care of him.

Seth placed the towel around his neck and could feel his body instantly cool down.

Melanie slid both her hands into her back jean’s pockets. She felt awkward being around him while he was obviously hurting and vulnerable.

Melanie could see the cab pull up from the side of the alley. If you would have told Melanie that she would be standing in an alley cleaning up vomit with her old boyfriend she would have asked you what planet you flew in from. This is the last place she thought she would be; with the last person on earth she would be helping.

“I called that cab for you. It’s time for you to go home and sleep that off. ”

Seth knew by her tone that it was not an offer. Was that a sympathy or disappointment he saw in her eyes? He knew the mental and physical state he was in that he was not in a position to argue with her. The fact that she was here helping him was more than he deserved. He handed Melanie the towel and bucket as he walked pass her to the cab.

“I am sorry…about everything.” Seth sat down in the back of the cab and rolled the window down. “Thank you for tonight.”

“I don’t hate you Seth. Why don’t you try forgiving yourself…let what happened between us go.”

“I can’t. I won’t.” Seth leaned back in the cab rolling up the window.

The driver pulled off down Fountain Drive as the snow fell around her casting a beautiful glow from the street lights above her.

Melanie walked back into McFadden’s handing Charlie the bucket and towel.

“Thanks for that Charlie. Could you make sure he gets his jacket when he comes back to pick up his car?” As she leaned over the counter.

“Anything for you Mel.”

“Flirting when I am not around I see?” Charlie and Tyler shook hands.

Melanie turned around to see Tyler sliding down into the stool next to her. Melanie leaned in to hug Tyler. She held on longer and tighter than usual. Melanie didn’t know how to explain how she felt. The closest description to the emotion that she felt was – scared.

“Hey Beautiful.”

“What’s wrong?”

Melanie inwardly fought with herself on what to do. Does she tell Tyler? How will he re-act to the news? Will he get worked up about nothing? Is there anything to tell? The one thing that Melanie did not want was for this to come back to haunt her, but to bring up a run in with Seth in such a small town as Providence is crazy. And if he is moving back here it is bound to happen again. Melanie had to ask herself is this town big enough for the three of us?

Melanie rationalized that it was pointless to bring up Seth. She didn’t want Tyler to know how bad Seth was taking the news. It almost seemed like rubbing it in to tell Tyler how hurt about everything Seth was. Seth’s drunkenness tonight was his own way of coming to terms and dealing with the fact that Melanie had moved on and was getting married. So why bring up Seth? On top of it, there was no need to rub Seth in Tyler’s face.

She met Tyler a few months after Seth left for medical school. Melanie was in no shape to be friends with him, they started out as mere acquaintances; but Tyler ended up being a good friend. Over the past 2 years their friendship blossomed into a relationship that Melanie has come to respect and appreciate.

Tyler was good for her and she for him. Melanie decided not to inject Seth in between them. She was determined to enjoy her evening with her fiancé despite the bizarre day she had.

“Nothing babe…I could use a stiff drink.” Melanie turned and smiled “I missed you today.”

Melanie and Tyler’s evening went on to be a good time despite how it may have started out. She enjoyed Tyler’s company. He always made her laugh and put her at ease. He always had a funny story about something that happened at work. Tyler was an up and coming news reporter for the local NBC channel. He was still a street reporter with his eye on the anchor seat. The behind the scene antics of the television news room never ceased to amaze her. He had an early call for the morning, these are the times that she regretted moving home, but after ‘shacking up’ with Seth as her mother so politely puts it, Melanie made spending the night over Tyler’s far and few between. Another mundane routine before a commitment is a path that she was going to avoid.

She loved being with Tyler just being near him wrapped up in his arms made her feel safe. Melanie loved how he loved her. Tyler was so attentive and charming. He was a good solid man that was sure of himself and what he wants and that is Melanie. She proceeded to bring him up to date on the last minute details of the wedding.

On her ride home back to her parents, she checked her voicemail seeing she had 3 messages from Lauren. She couldn’t even hear her phone over the loud music.

Lauren told her about selling the house to Seth earlier and Melanie told her about McFadden’s and Seth vomiting from being drunk.

“You should have taken your foot and pushed him over into the pool of his own vomit.”

Melanie burst out laughing. Lauren could say what she thought and how she felt and didn’t care what others felt about it. There was definitely freedom in speaking you mind that Melanie has come to accept from Lauren.

“You are so bad.”

“What in the hell did he mean by ‘he can’t…he won’t?’ Huh…does he mean he can’t forgive himself or does he mean we won’t give up on trying to pick up where the two of you left off?”

“I honestly don’t know.”

“Well, I sure as hell would like to know what he meant by that. He has got another thing coming if he thinks he is going to bring some drama up in here…up in here.”

“Seth won’t be any trouble. He’s harmless. He is just going to have to deal with it….I know him. He is not going to purposefully cause trouble. Helene and Joseph would kill him.”

“I wouldn’t count on that if I were you.”

“I am in front of my house. I am going straight to bed. I will call you tomorrow as always.”

“Think about what I said.”

“Good-bye.”

“Bye.”

Melanie pulled up to the front of her house thinking over the day and how her past and future came to an intersection at this point in time. She looked at her house and tried to count how many birthday, Thanksgiving dinners and Christmas mornings she had shared with her family and Seth. If you had asked Melanie four years ago what else did she want; she would have easily said nothing. She grew up with loving parents and a good life. Melanie always thought that she was lucky to find the love of her life at 16. She was content to spend the rest of her life with Seth. Everyone told them they were young. Melanie’s father always told her to take a break from Seth in college to date other people, but she wouldn’t hear of it. Maybe her father was right?

One thing was certain that there would be no more dwelling on the past…her future was two weeks away. Tyler was her future. The life and love that Melanie is building will be as Tyler’s wife and one another’s families. She owed him to concentrate on their commitment to each other. More importantly, he owed that to herself.