Part II

August 1988

"I don't know what went wrong, but I bet you Annalisa said something."

"Said what?"

"I don't know...something.  I just know one day we were cool and everything was great, and now he wants to break up with me.  She said she could break us up.  I believe it was something she said."

"I think it's the shock talking."  Yolanda sat on the edge of her seat.   Her sister Em, was losing all sense of reality.   The breakup with Bryton had done her in.   She was a mess, accusing her best friend of sabotaging her relationship and now she wanted to leave college and move to Chicago-a change of scenery.

Yolanda's ears were bent to the last grandiose idea, amidst suffering her own shocking breakup.   What was it about the summer and how it made young men lose their minds?  But Emogene and Bryton were like a fairytale.  He was a true boyfriend-picked her up for work when her car was down; he even took her to dinner, the movies, concerts-nothing at all like Cris, Yolanda's so-called boyfriend, who was only as good as a placeholder anyhow.  Her heart belonged to Laku, and she couldn't wait until the end of the summer so she'd finally be kissing distance from her true love.  

"So you're going to just leave...no plan, nothing.   Just let some guy because you throw your future away because he's in the drop zone?"

"What?"

"The drop zone-passed the honeymoon phase and into the drop zone, where they start to have regrets about you.  Drop Zone."  Yolanda repeated as if the second time she said it further illustrated the point.  Em wasn't listening due the sound her heart shattering beneath her chest.  

"I'm calling Uncle Lee, and see if I can come."

"Wow...you're really going to do this?  Well, maybe it'll be good for you.   Just don't lose sight of your goals ok?  I'm a freshman, and the last thing you want is to have me matching you in credits come sophomore year.  Got it?"

"Yeah, I got it."

It was times like these where they were close enough to share heartbreaks, that Yolanda and Emogene were on the same plane, where two years apart had become simply ‘eighteen months'.   Less than a year ago, Em had chicken pox she'd contracted from her nephew and her face was so stark to the normal flawless texture that called on Yolanda to run out to the store for her.  

---

March 1991

"Just stay in the Liberal Arts College, pick a program that is ‘business', I mean it's not like you have much of a choice now, is there."  Yolanda pedaled on stationary bike, wiping her brow.  

"But my major is Business Administration.   Everyone I started college had graduated already." Emogene cried as if the world was coming to an end because she'd been denied entry to the School of Business because of a low grade point average.   Little did she know, Yolanda had taken a break as well, going on a year now, as she'd failed to meet the requirements for the School of Social Work-lemons make fabulous lemonade, there was no point of wasting her worth when she wasn't really sure anymore if the job market for Social Workers would guarantee her employment. 

"So what!  Don't worry about them.  Just do you.   Which classes do you like more?" Sipping water, to stave off her thirst, she'd done two miles and her legs felt like jelly.  

"Economics, I guess."  Em admitted, glancing over the University Course Bulletin.

"There you go, pick Econ as your major.   Problem solved, now on to something really hard like World Peace." The younger sister joked, reflecting briefly of how Emogene could make a huge deal out of something so small.

"H mm, and then just major in Business at the grad level? Thanks YoYo."

"No problem.   I have to go.  There's a Lakota Sioux trying to swim in my soup."

"You're so silly."

"Bye!"

August 1996

"Laku!  Em!  What the hell?" Yolanda screamed at the sight-her drunken sister groping her husband.

"It's not what you think YoYo..."  Laku tried to explain what must have looked like he was engrossed in an adulterous delight with her sister who just stood there trying to keep her body vertical.   Laku wiped his lips free of the gloss Em had lathered there. 

"So you finally had to do it huh?"  Yolanda screamed.   "You slut!"

"I'm sorry Yolanda...I'm sorry."

"Go to hell!  Both of you."  Yolanda grabbed her coat.  Her pregnant belly protruding outwards as she tried shoving her arms into the sleeves.   She tore from the room as if she'd laid eyes on a ghost, Laku ran to catch up to her.

"Yolanda, wait, baby.   She tried to kiss me."

"Fucking liar.   You're such a liar!"  She pulled out from his grasp and missed the top step, tumbling down the swirled staircase, landing with a loud thud at the bottom.

"Yolanda...Yolanda!"

---

"Don't talk me.  Don't touch me!"  Yolanda's right elbow, left hip and knee were bruised and sore, and dizzy from her head bumping against the wall.   "Ow..." she cried for the pain to stop.

"Baby, let me help you." Laku reached for her.

"Yeah, YoYo let us help." Emogene stood at the bottom of the steps, alcohol wafting from her breath.

"Shut up, just shut up Em, and leave me the hell alone, both of you!"   Yolanda shouted.   "I don't need your help!"  She rolled over to her knees, trying to stand to her feet.  Her legs gave way, and Laku was there to catch her.   He scooped her into his arms and placed her on the sofa.  

"Call 911."

"What happened?"  A few family members and friends came to sounds of screams and the loud thud of a body tumbling.  

***

Present, February 2001

"You need to rest Em, you've just had major surgery for crying out loud."  Annalisa, nurse and best friend to Emogene wedged herself between Emogene and the door where she was determined to escape through.

"She doesn't want to see me does she?" She cried.

"I wouldn't worry about that now.   You need to rest. Now get back into bed.   Don't force me to have you restrained."

"But she's my baby sister Anna...and she just saved my life."

"Which is why you need to be storing your strength...I know you want to see her, but I promise you that you will be of no use to her when she comes through this crisis and you're flat on your back.  She gave you a kidney.   Honor that, by keeping your promise to take care of it."  Annalisa was finally able to stoke Em's need to spoil her own recovery by running around the hospital searching for her sister.

"Will you go see her, no one will tell me anything.   But I'll believe you if you tell me the truth.   Don't spare me Anna, I want to know the truth."

"I promise."  Anna tucked the sheet, and lowered the bed.   "Rest.   It's almost dinner time."

"Oh great, applesauce and chicken broth, sounds yummy."  Em frowned.

***

Thanksgiving, 2001

"I'm hungry Mama!"  Chenoa, the eldest of the two girls tugged at her mother's dress.

"Here sweetie, have a bite of my granola." Yolanda handed her daughter a snack from her purse.

"You aren't spoiling that child's dinner, are you Yolanda?"  Her mother, Beverly questioned pretending as if she weren't aware of the reason a snack was needed.   The kids, like every adult was hungry.   Who in the world has a scheduled dinner and holds the entire holiday up for one person?

"Dinner was supposed to be at 3.   And here we are waiting for Em to arrive, like always."  Yolanda groaned.   Laku hoisted the youngest of his girls Cherikha into his arms.  

"Well, if she's not here in five more minutes, we'll bless the table and get on with it."  Beverly fussed at the dining table.    Her other children and grandchildren were all set for dinner, and had been chatting and playing catch up, awaiting the diva's arrival.   Nine months since the surgery, and everyone thought she of all people had so much to be grateful for.   How could she hold dinner up this way?   It was so typical of her to make everything all about her.   "Call her again.  Maybe something happened."

Sure, nothing had happened.   This was the norm for Emogene.   She was probably in Vegas or Atlantic City somewhere, pulling slots, all the while holding up Thanksgiving Dinner from everyone else.

---

"Hey...everybody!"  Emogene stumbled in the door way after falling into Barry's chest.   Her brother caught her in his arms, righting her gait.   She'd been drinking all day, probably all night.

"Wow!  Just wow!  I give you a kidney and this is how you repay me?  This is ridiculous!   Can we bless this table, and get on to dinner."  Yolanda frowned.  Everyone simply stared at the Em, as she staggered to the table.  

"Hello to you too baby sis."  Emogene sputtered in a drunken haze.   "Happy Thanksgiving!"

Yolanda didn't bother to respond.    It was pointless, wishing that the day would just end.   She knew this wasn't a good idea from the start.   But Laku insisted that it was time for her and Em to clear the air and try to repair the damage of their relationship.

"What?  Little sister, you not speaking today?   Well, damn!"  Em rocked back and forth, toe to heel.

"Please Em, can we just get through the dinner."  Yolanda negotiated plates while her husband Laku kept the girls entertained, along with their cousins at the child's table.

"Did I ever say thank you?"   Em warbled.

"Not now...don't ruin holiday anymore than you already have."

"What do you mean, I just want to say thank you to my baby sister.  You don't want to accept my thanks?"

"You thanked me ok Em, numerous times.   It's no big deal."

"It is a fucking big deal!"  She yelled.   Everyone turned to the sound of Em's voice blaring over the sound of the football game on the television and talk of what was wanted for Christmas.

"Em, come sit.  I'll fix your plate."

"No...I want to know why my sister hates me so much!   And I wanna know now!"  She hiccupped.

"Come on Em, the kids.   Just have a seat.   Tell me what you want; I'll fix it for you."   Barry seated her as everyone else looked at her in awe and shame.  They were embarrassed over her tirade but dare not upset Beverly by ganging up on her, at least that was how Beverly would record it.

"Please, can you talk to me?"   Em cried.   Laku kept one eye on his kids and the other on the festering fight across the room.   He wondered just when he should make a move to run interference, though it seemed Barry had everything under control. 

---

"Just rest..."  Yolanda tucked her sister in.   

"Wait...don't go YoYo."

"You need to sleep it off."  The bucket at her side, in case she needed to empty again.   No one else cared if she couldn't hold her liquor.   They'd been saying for years now that she needed an intervention, and still after she showed up drunk, new kidney in tow, they still pretended that it was nothing.    "When you wake up, then we can talk."

---

"Laku, I want you to take the kids to the hotel.   They don't need to be here to see this."

"What are you going to do?"  He asked his wife as she dressed the girls.

"I can do it Mama.   I can do it."  Chenoa stressed her independence.   Yolanda backed off and switched to her little sister who lay asleep on her daddy's shoulder.  

"Mama, no.  I go with you.   I go with you."  Cherikha cried, reaching for her mom.

"I'll drive over, get them to bed.  But I'm coming back.  We need to take care of this tonight.   My sister is going into rehab tonight, or I'm finished with this entire enabling family."

---

Emogene was awake; now empty she was thirsty for water, stirring about in the kitchen looking for a clean glass.   Most of the dishes were rinsed now and seated in the dishwasher.   Their oldest sister Carmelita had set the washer and it was in the last cycle.  

"You ok baby?"  Beverly asked.   "I bet it was that turkey probably wasn't cooked all the way through."

"I'm fine Mom."

"I tell you, girl you work too hard.   You think you've caught that flu?"

"No...it's not a flu."  Em waved her mother's hand from her forehead.   "And I have to work to support myself.   I don't have a husband to take care of me."

"And that is the reason why you're drinking your life away?"  Emogene had come into the house unannounced using her old key.   A few of their nine siblings remained; the others blew the ice cream stand.   They'd been at this juncture before with Emogene and nothing resulted.   It took Yolanda to be the one to say it.   Their sister, Ms. in Control was a functioning alcoholic and needed help.   As much as she knew she'd wind up being the support person de facto, it didn't matter if the mail man was.   Her sister needed help.  This wasn't about keeping the donor kidney functioning.   If Emogene continued this way, she'd be dead.   Something needed to be done and fast!  "...I have a husband, kids.   And that is your problem?  The reason you are killing yourself with that poison?"

"Yolanda!"

"No, mother stay out of this.   You need to go into rehab tonight Em."

"Yolanda!"

"You're right."

"What?"  Yolanda couldn't believe Em was going along with it.   She expected a fight, an all out assault, a takedown.   She wasn't prepared for this show.

"You're absolutely right.   I was late today, because I couldn't get out of my bed.   Merck suspended me with pay, said I need to take a leave, get myself together.   Or I'd..."

"...And instead of doing that, you decided to drink."  Yolanda interrupted, pointin at the obvious.  

"So that's it.   Awe, honey I tell you that job doesn't appreciate you."  Beverly's denial was gaining new heights.

"No mom, it's me.   I did this.   I'm the one that did this, no one to blame but me."  Em gulped a mouthful of water.   "I want to say thank you Yolanda, for everything you've done for me.   You've always been there, no matter how shitty I know I've been to you.   How you can be in the same room with me is beyond me."

"You're my sister Em, if it's help you want, I'm going to be there for you, I love you."

"I know I need to do this.  And if you will, I need you to be my support person.   I don't think I can get through this without you." 

The words were there.   And now this was step one.  She was admitting she had a problem.  And no amount of denial was going to fix that.   Beverly was the reason everything went to hell. 

"Sweetie, all you need is rest.   You're stressed out.   I keep telling you..."

"No.  Mom that's what you want to believe.   I've got more than enough problems and drinking isn't making it any better.   I'm tired of this cycle I'm in.   I need help and I'm going tonight.   Will you take me YoYo?"

"Sure, of course I'll come with you, I'm your mother."  Beverly laid the kitchen towel down on the counter, headed for her coat and purse.   She was the mother of the bunch, and Yolanda had a family to attend to.   In a few days, she'd be on her way back home to her life in Arkansas.    Em, she thought, needed her mom.   Yolanda rolled her eyes, waiting to see if Em would call her back.

"No Mom, I think it's best that you don't."  Em pressed her hand to her mother's cheek.   "I love you Mom, but I need to do this my way.   Well, YoYo what do you say, we go right now?"

"I'd be honored to.   I'm ready when you are."  Yolanda sighed.   For the first time in over ten years, she could see growth in her sister, and there was no fight, no tears, and no pointed accusations at others.  

---

Everyone watched as Yolanda climbed into the driver's seat of Emogene's Mercedes Benz SUV closing the seat belt.   She'd never driven a vehicle with this many gadgets before.   Pausing to do a dry run of the dash, she tested every button for reaction.  

"What's wrong?"  Em asked her sister.

"Nothing...nothing.   I'm so proud of you.   I thought this was going to be a fight to the death."

"No.   I'm tired of fighting.   I can't stand to lose another thing.   No one wants to be around me.   I can't even show appreciation for the gift you've given me.   I just keep messing things up.    I want to stop. You're the only person I can count on, the only one who's there for me without fail.   I know I'm not the easiest person to get along with either.   But I want to be a better person.   I don't like what I see when I look at myself, so I know I must be repulsive to everyone else.   Mom's in denial.   Everyone else just looks at me like they feel sorry for me..."

"I feel sorry for you too Em..."

"Yeah, but you have no problem pointing out my faults to me...and I know it's not the most receptive thing to hear.   But at least you have the strength to do it, and no care about the fallout."

"Tonight, I just want you get a good night's sleep.   Take this one day at a time, ok.   Don't try to go in there and fix yourself.    Let them give you the tools you need, let the light shine in Em."

"Take the car.   I want you to drive it back to the hotel.  I may need a few things from the condo..."

"Just make a list.  I'll take care of it."   Yolanda cut the engine in front of East Village Transitions. 

"I never meant to hurt you YoYo.  You were always so much stronger than me...and I..."

"Not tonight Em..."

"No, I need to say this, please."  She sobbed.   "I need you to know that I know I've been shitty to you, and I'm not a nice person.  But I am going to fix me.   You've got such a beautiful family.   I wish I had that..."

"You're not in the grave Em, you can still have it, all of it.   Maybe not everything at one time, I mean who the hell wants to really juggle all of those plates.   But you need to let yourself feel pain and then work through it.   You've always ran, hid, and it makes things so much worse.   And the second step is right on the other side of those doors."  Yolanda opened the door, and Em walked through.   It was a tough road ahead, but at least Em had the one person she could count on to see her through it.

"Will you pray for me?"

"I've never stopped praying for you Em."

-The End-