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The Next Day 

Chapter 1

Day 1

The scene is John’s office when Evangeline reveals her feelings for him.

“Can’t you see that I’m falling in love with you?”

“I thought we banished words like ‘love’ from our vocabulary.”

“Yes, I probably said that.”

“What you’re asking for I don’t know if I’m capable of that anymore but if anyone can change it, it’s you.”

“If that ever happens, let me know.”

The next day at the courthouse Antonio is exonerated in Tico Santi’s murder and John Doe’s hearing is scheduled to take place.  The DNA test results have returned and John will soon receive them.

Before the John Doe hearing John asks Evangeline to be patient with him.  After the hearing she sees John in his office and they agree to give their relationship another try. 

Still in her heart, Evangeline knows that John does not love her the way that she loves him.  In order to protect her heart she writes him a letter.  She knows that if she sees him he will try to convince her not to give up on them but she feels that she has to step away now before she drowns in this sea of doubt.

The letter reads:

John, I know that I said that I would give our relationship time to grow but I can’t. Yes I do love you and that much is true.  You say that you ‘could’ love me but I know that at this point in time you do not.  I can’t put my life on hold for a ‘maybe’. It is clear that your feelings are conflicted.  Your need to always be there for someone else does not allow you to be here for me and that is not fair to either of us.  

It hurts me to say this but I can’t be with you the way things are.  You are not free to love me with the restrictions that you have placed on your heart. Sure we started out in a casual relationship that morphed into something much more.  As I said to you, I can’t keep putting myself out here without knowing how you feel.  Now I know and I must protect my heart against any further hurt.  It’s kind of funny that I’m the one who suggested we have this casual thing and banish words like ‘love’ and ‘relationship’ from our vocabulary.  Who could have guessed that I would be the one professing love?  Well I did and now I must cut my losses and move on.  No, I don’t want to be friends John.  After having been intimate with you I don’t think that I can just put all of that ‘back in the bottle’ and act like nothing happened.  

I’m more upset with myself than anything.  I thought that I could handle a casual fling after my disaster with RJ but evidently I was wrong.  Once again my heart betrayed me.  Perhaps I’ll take a page out of your book ‘I’m not capable of love anymore’. It seems to work for you, to be detached only allowing the pleasure of the physical but keeping the heart totally out of the equation.  But right now I will simply retreat to my neutral corner, lick my wounds, and live to fight another day.  One thing for sure is that I will definitely take a break from romance. 

Have a good life John.  Unfortunately I won’t be a part of it.

Evangeline