Penname: Bredreaway [Contact]

Real name: LaDawn

Member Since: January 30 2011

Membership status: Member

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Reviews by Bredreaway


Welcome to the Family by philipa1234
Rated: 17 and older
starstarstarstarhalf-star
[Reviews - 439]
Summary:

banner

 

Ellie finds herself living the life that she could only imagine in her dreams. She has graduated from college with a degree in accounting, she is with the man she loves who is just as succesful, if not more than her, and he has just asked her to marry him. What more could a girl ask for? What could go wrong? Everything begins to change once she meets his family and realizes they dont like her. Can this break up their relationship? What is she to do? What about their "family" business? Will their marraige go on? After being on top the only place left to go is down, and Ellie is sure on her way there.



Table of Contents
Categories: Original Fiction
Characters: Original Character(s)
Classification: General
Genre: Comedy , Drama, Family, Friendship, Romance
Story Status: None
Pairings: None
Warnings: Drugs/Drug Use, Extreme Language, Original Characters, Racism, Work in Progress
Series: Mafioso Series
Chapters: 28
Completed:No
Word count: 50333
Read Count: 89293
Published: May 20 2011
Updated: May 28 2014

[Report This]

Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 3

great job...please do not let elli become argumentive, unsure of herself and/or the person she was in the last chapter..

Update as much as you like



Author's Response:

Thank you! I dont think she will. Despite how mean his family is she really does want them to like her so no matter what she is going to try and be the best version of herself when she is around them. 

Thanks again for reading!

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed
Date: May 26 2011
Title: Chapter 19: Chapter 13

love it

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: April 25 2012
Title: Chapter 20: Chapter 14

love it

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: April 25 2012
Title: Chapter 21: Chapter 21

please, please update soon.   I want to say how proud of you, is see the improvement in your writing skill

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: April 25 2012
Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 5

Thank ypu for the update....Your story is coming together very nicely and I beginning enjoy the characters internal and external makeup.

 

Great Job

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: May 27 2011
Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 4

philipa1234, I really enjoyed this chapter because Ellie took the growup why of talking with nick, instead of getting drunk and throwing a fit. 

The thing thst preplex me is that women want change a man's entire life, if this going the direction I think its going,let her except the family business and make her a stronger women.  Make her stronger than Nick's mom...Just a thought.

 

Excellent Chapter, please update soon

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: May 27 2011
Title: Chapter 1: Prologue

The opening paragraphs has me wanting more

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: May 21 2011
Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 1

I am really enjoying your story and the vagueness of the city and the people.

great job

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: May 23 2011
Title: Chapter 3: Character photos

I like the pics

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: May 24 2011
Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 2

I am speechless but it is a good chapter

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstar
Date: May 25 2011
Title: Welcome to the Family

I have always stated that you are amazing writer but you have taken the predictable path in the last two chapters or basically this chapter.

1.  She mad at her man for losing the baby, why not the person that did the shooting

2. She leaves her man because the lose of the baby and because of his profession.  Why does she need to be weak?  Why can't she be strong and expect her man's life?

3. Why not give her backbone that somewhat matches Nick but softer version.  Have her say "Hey, if this relationship is going to work, you need to let me into your mind, life, world and no secrets."  But do not let her be a predictable character by making him choose between his family business and her. She can be part of his world as the strong silent partner with a pair balls to matches his mother's caustic attitude.

Do not become predictable, take it to whole new level.  Again, you are an amazing writer.

Just my thoughts



Author's Response:

I know i was thinking that it was getting predictable as I wrote it but dont worry I think that will end soon. Right now i need her to be the way she is so that she can grow and change through the story otherwise the story would end up being about a dull couple that is so in love and all about how in love they are and I hate stories like that because they are just too predictable for my liking. Thank you so much for your comment! i was worried it was coming off predictable. I'm going to try and take that out for the coming chapters. From your comment I think you are going to like the direction the story will eventually take :) 

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarhalf-star
Date: June 13 2011
Title: Chapter 17: Chapter 12

I feel that you are amazing writer and you draw me into your character which is amazing. However, the storyline has become predictable which I hoping it would not because the story started off so good.

Predictable parts: She is weak (something tragic happens, she runs): wants the Italan man she loves to his change profession but she does not change.  Why?

Why can't she not be the stronger half of him? stand up to his mother, make him respect her, and push is buttons in positive not whinny.

I know this is your vision, your story and you have a clear path for the story ending but please make differnt it from other stories with the same theme.

You are truly talented writer, keep the good work and update soon

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: July 07 2011
Title: Chapter 25: Chapter 25

What?  I am so confused by this story that it is driving me crazy.  It started of wonderful but somewhere along the way I got lost.

why would he marry a woman he does not want?

I am just lost

 

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarhalf-star
Date: October 22 2012
Title: Chapter 20: Chapter 14

nice update

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: March 13 2012
Title: Chapter 23: Chapter 23

wait, what! it was just getting interesting.  nice update

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarhalf-star
Date: July 23 2012
Title: Chapter 24: Chapter 24

nice update

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: July 31 2012
Title: Chapter 28: Chapter 28

I am glad your back.  Wonderful update

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: May 28 2014
Title: Chapter 1: Prologue

Sometime I wonder how us women think....good chapter, however shhe needs to rethink her pland...She needs to be strong  woman

 

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: May 14 2013
BIG! by readlover
Rated: 17 and older
starstarstarstarstar
[Reviews - 40]
Summary:

stories/1212/images/big-exhibit-logo.jpg

 

 A symbol of satisfaction plus the embodiment of attraction…..  Just like age aint nothing but a number, theses five women will learn that size is nothing, but a number through the situations they endure to find their happily ever after.

 

 



Table of Contents
Categories: Books, Original Fiction
Characters: None
Classification: General
Genre: Action-Adventure , Comedy , Drama, Family, Friendship, Inspirational, Poetry, Romance, Suspense
Story Status: None
Pairings: None
Warnings: Original Characters, Sexual Content , Strong Sexual Content , Threesome+, Work in Progress
Series: None
Chapters: 9
Completed:No
Word count: 19410
Read Count: 12015
Published: May 25 2011
Updated: January 08 2012

[Report This]

Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 5

more please, this is a great story



Author's Response:

Thank  you!!! glad you like it 

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: September 14 2011
Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 3

love it



Author's Response:

Thanks!!!

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: September 14 2011
Title: Chapter 5: Chapter 4

more please



Author's Response:

THANK  YOU!!!  

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: September 14 2011
Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 3

very good



Author's Response:

Thank you :)

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: August 30 2011
Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 1

I cannot wait for the nex update



Author's Response:

Thank you!!! 

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: June 10 2011
Retired
Bouquet de Fleurs (Bouquet of Flowers) by tpeezy22
Rated: 17 and older
starstarstarstarstar
[Reviews - 275]
Summary:

Six months after being attacked, Grace moved to Paris with her boyfriend, Henri. Once there, she must overcome adjusting to French life, working with her crazy new boss, and move on with her life. Henri is trying to find the right time to propose to Grace, but will her pride and his family get the better of her?

 

Sequel to Floraison d'Amour (Blossoming Love)



Table of Contents
Categories: Original Fiction
Characters: None
Classification: None
Genre: Comedy , Drama, Family, Romance
Story Status: None
Pairings: None
Warnings: Adult Situations, Extreme Language, Fluff, Original Characters, Racism, Sexual Content
Series: None
Chapters: 50
Completed:Yes
Word count: 90875
Read Count: 33721
Published: May 25 2011
Updated: September 15 2014

[Report This]

Title: Chapter 9: Chapter 9

great chapter

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: July 31 2011
Title: Chapter 41: Chapter 41

Wonderful update.

 Reviewer: Bredreaway Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: December 04 2013

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.