Reviews For The Ace of Spades
Title: II

Teen romance is typically not my cup of tea. I read this story because of the rating. I thought it was an adult story with teen characters. 

Physical descriptions of the characters are vague. I was kind of excited when Chanel was eyeing Jonah as he stood in line at the food court. I thought, "Finally a description of what he looks like." Jonah's physical appearance can be a bit vague for now because Chanel is in her own world but I was expecting a more detailed description of Chanel since she is the object of Jonah's affection. There were a ton of details about the characters' clothing but next to none about their physical appearance.

The writing is fine.

Keep writing.



Author's Response:

Thanks! Honestly, I wasn't even thinking about describing their skin color and whatnot while I was writing until someone pointed it out in an earlier desciption and I was like 'Oh... oops.' Thanks for reading :)

Reviewer: JFJD Signed [Report This]
Date: October 07 2014 04:24 pm

Title: I

He really is; honestly I kind of hate that. And there'll be some self discovery coming from Chanel later in the book, so I hope you stick around to see her stop acting like she runs the world. Thank you for reading and commenting 8)

Reviewer: cinnamonsugar Signed [Report This]
Date: October 07 2014 04:48 am

Title: II

I don't know why but I can't stand Chanel. I hope her attitude changes. Jonah seems like a love sick puppy chasing Chanel at her heels.

Author's Response:

He really is; honestly I kind of hate that. And there'll be some self discovery coming from Chanel later in the book, so I hope you stick around to see her stop acting like she runs the world. Thank you for reading and commenting 8)

Reviewer: Dreamingofalifetime Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: October 07 2014 04:43 am

Title: I

HEY!!! Think this is pretty interesting :) and I think u should definitely continue writing this. It has a lot of potential.

I think u should continue writing this. Sometimes its gotta be the other way around, its gets tiring to hear about bad boy popular boy who gets to sleep with anybody he wants with cute innocent perfect girl. At times u gotta switch it up make it different which of course brings in creativity.Right the story the way you envision ed it in your mind because that's the only way you'll enjoy writing this story. Don't let anything deter u, write this story the way u pictured it.



Author's Response:

Thank you very much. I'll definitely be writing the story the way I envision it going. You don't have to tell me twice lmao :D. Thanks for reading and giving me a boost of confidence.

Reviewer: FreshBreath Signed [Report This]
Date: October 05 2014 02:18 pm

Title: I

In regards to the I relatable, Chanel is upper classed obviously spoiled. That's pointed out throughout the chapter. Most people aren't accustomed to that lifestyle and the privileges it brings. So it's very easy to dislike her--as rich, spoiled, popular, and rude often have negative connotations. It's simply easier to make her the "bad guy" from the get go. Much like in other fiction if the guy is a crass butthole and the girl is sweet and longsuffering we make her the hero. It's nothing terrible, it just helps develop the story and teach readers that everything that glitters isn't gold. 

 

I won't continue reading because the characters don't appeal to me. Of course it's nothing personal, I really don't like high school fiction. So it's not personal that I'm stopping, hence why I made it clear that I love your style of writing, I hope you continue with more fiction because I know you're going to be amazing. 

 

Thank you for seeing my review as constructive, I find that it's hard to actually leave criticism these days. Usually I reserve it for authors who refer to their tales as books because I've been reading interracial fiction via Kindle lately and a lot of it is repetitive trash. That's another reason why physicalities are so important. I don't know if you indulge as well, but typically the women all look the same and the men too. It gets frustrating and boring. So when I click on a new story I'm almost immediately consumed with wondering if the female lead is going to have caramel hued skin (or whatever the hell chocolate is now a days) with light eyes and a body to die for. I know that in the case of the most popular girl in school some stereotype, if not most, is expected...but I digress. I can go on forever (and I know it's a touchy subject, I've seem plenty of authors and reviewers reamed for such talk). 

 

Thank you for taking the time to reply! I hope I cleared some things up:) 



Author's Response:

You definitely did clear things up. 

Thank you for checking out this story in the first place. :)

Reviewer: J Anonymous [Report This]
Date: October 05 2014 04:40 am

Title: I

1. I think what the reviewer meant by physical description is skin tone and shade for all characters or at least the main ones. Just like you consider big boobs important some readers want to know if there is caramel skin partnered with long burgundy hair or of she's the color of rich earth with wide hips. We want to know how they look, perhaps not in full context, but it's nice to have something to run with. It's simple to say "decide for yourself how the characters look" rather than present morals of the story that didn't  really do much. When I read that review it came off as rude and off-putting. I hope it wasn't your intention, but the reader was just asking for character clarification. For instance, as a reader I typically don't read stories where the woman isn't darker brown, it's a personal fiction "study", but it's important to me. 

 

2. As much as I enjoy your writing style, I've seen this layout plenty of times. Love Don't Cost a Thing? She's All That? Even Clueless. Similar premise. I truly hope you have some uber original stuff to throw in because the rich girl/guy need girl/guy is a cult classic, but we've seen it all. I'm not sure if I'm going to continue reading; but I hope for the best for you and this tricky topic. 

 

3. I believe we are socialized to not like women like Chanel. Rich, snobbish, self-absorbed, with little apparent depth. So even mentioning that she comes from money and treats her peers like dirt is grounds for a reader to dislike her. I disliked her from the first mention. It's not hard to. Instead, we covet the pseudo-strong female leads who rose from ashes into a beautiful Phoenix (but of course they don't know because while they're obviously perfect they have no clue). We, as women, are taught to cherish the delicate ensembles of womanhood rather than acknowledge that sometimes we can be crude bitches. We choose to read about sweet southern dolls and insecure plus sized beauties so that we feel more relatable. It's easier to put yourself in shoes that feel more like your own rather than walk in some rich girls Chanel heels (I actually don't know if Chanel sales shoes). So it might not be true disdain, it could be the shroud of the cards we are all dealt as women. There is no relation when there is no glaringly obvious insecurity. As women we are bred to be insecure. I don't know if this makes sense. 

There might be typos but it's hard to tell from my phone. I would apologize but I'm taking a sorry not sorry campaign where I don't apologize for things I'm not truly sorry about. 

Happy writing and I wish you the best! 




Author's Response:

I agree with you- after reading my review response, it did sound really rude and I didn't mean for it to sound that way and I apologize [to the reviewer] for that. You've made really good points and your criticism is some that I can take with me. I've had much of the book written for a while and the skin colour [and everything else] is actually coming in the next two chapters more one than the other. Even if you do stop reading it's okay, I understand. I agree with the thought 'everything's' been done, it's totally true. The only way I can make this topic work is if I just make it original and that's what I'm trying to do. But it's really unbelieveable that you said Chanel is unrelateable. So maybe you can't relate to her lifestyle, but you're only two chapters in. You haven't read about any of her personal problems, yet. She's still a woman so she's going to encounter the same insecurities as the rest of us. I'm not just going to toss all of the problems in the open in the first chapter and have them overcome them throughout the story- that's not what the book is about. There's other conflicts that aren't personal that will be taken care of because it goes with the plot; the personal problems will be solved on the side. 

This being said, I'm totally taking everything you said as constructive criticism. Thank you for reading and again I'll totally understand if you don't want to continue reading. Although I couldn't tell the exact reason why you would discontinue reading. Is it because I cam off rude in the response, or is it because you like my writing, you just don't like what I'm writing? Thanks for reading :)



Author's Response:

I agree with you- after reading my review response, it did sound really rude and I didn't mean for it to sound that way and I apologize [to the reviewer] for that. You've made really good points and your criticism is some that I can take with me. I've had much of the book written for a while and the skin colour [and everything else] is actually coming in the next two chapters more one than the other. Even if you do stop reading it's okay, I understand. I agree with the thought 'everything's' been done, it's totally true. The only way I can make this topic work is if I just make it original and that's what I'm trying to do. But it's really unbelieveable that you said Chanel is unrelateable. So maybe you can't relate to her lifestyle, but you're only two chapters in. You haven't read about any of her personal problems, yet. She's still a woman so she's going to encounter the same insecurities as the rest of us. I'm not just going to toss all of the problems in the open in the first chapter and have them overcome them throughout the story- that's not what the book is about. There's other conflicts that aren't personal that will be taken care of because it goes with the plot; the personal problems will be solved on the side. 

This being said, I'm totally taking everything you said as constructive criticism. Thank you for reading and again I'll totally understand if you don't want to continue reading. Although I couldn't tell the exact reason why you would discontinue reading. Is it because I cam off rude in the response, or is it because you like my writing, you just don't like what I'm writing? Thanks for reading :)

Reviewer: J Anonymous [Report This]
Date: October 05 2014 03:37 am

Title: II

Oooo, I'm interested.



Author's Response:

:) fun to come. Thanks for reading and reviewing.

Reviewer: Bajerie Signed [Report This]
Date: October 05 2014 03:05 am

Title: II

That was a sweet little encounter tha they ahd.. Wonder who this Michael Sands is??



Author's Response:

He'll be introduced next chapter. Yay! And that at the cafe was cute between them now. Thanks for reading and reviewing. 

Reviewer: Jesslove3205 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 05 2014 02:51 am

Title: II

I can't stand Chanel and this chapter sealed that fact even more. Jonah is sweetheart but his taste in girls needs some work.



Author's Response:

Wow I'm actually really surprised that no one likes Chanel. I didn't think I really wrote her to be so bitchy but I guess when she was insulting him so much right before they made the deal in the library, that might be when I wrote her meanness in. I feel like she's pretty normal in chapter one, but in chapter two, I actually started writing her attitude in when she was talking with the teacher. But I didn't really see anything she said prior to the library scene as unlikeable. But this is actually good that no one likes her; I can actually run with this. I'd rather you not like her because she's a bitch than dislike her because she's stupid and 'typical'. Thanks for sharing your opinion it really opened a new door for me. 

Reviewer: pmgayles Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 05 2014 01:13 am

Title: II

Any physical description of the characters??



Author's Response:

In chapter one, I described Chanel's burgundy color hair when she was getting ready for her party, I also described her friends looks, too. In chapter two, I mentioned what colour hair Jonah has when he was trying a new style before they met at the mall. Now I know that hair colour blah blah blah isn't everything, so I also described his broad shoulders when Chanel was checking him out when he was getting their food at the cafe. At the beginning of chapter one, when Jonah was ogling Chanel, I also said that she had big boobs, that's something worth mentioning [in my opinion]. We know Chanel has brown eyes. The moral of the story: I've put physical description of the characters in the book. Thanks for reading.

Reviewer: Anon Anonymous [Report This]
Date: October 04 2014 11:25 pm

Title: I

I love this! A breath of fresh air.



Author's Response:

Thanks! I totally agree. I was just reading a typical shy girl/popular guy book, getting bored and wondering why nobody did anything different, like switch it up. Then I remembered; "Oh yeah, I write." I literally said out loud and I dragged myself out of bed, did some clicking and typing on the computer, and a new concept was born. Anyways, thank you very much for reading my book, I appreaciate the feedback. 

Reviewer: leah Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 04 2014 09:07 pm

Title: I

Very interesting start, I like the build up.. Please continue, I can't wait for the next post :D



Author's Response:

Thank you! I'm currently polishing the next chapter. I appreaciate you reading and reviewing!

Reviewer: sweetlooking218 Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 04 2014 01:32 pm

Title: I

Can't wait to see where this goes !!!!!



Author's Response:

The next chapter has a lot more action than this one- I mean, obviously this one has a lot of action: Jonah decides to attend her party and he goes and just kisses her, totally out of character for him. I'm really excited to show you guys where this story is going to go and can't wait to get chapter II up [it's a work in progress, clean up the edges and add more detail] and let the rocket fly! Thanks for taking the time to read and review!

Reviewer: Jesslove3205 Signed starstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: October 04 2014 02:47 am

Title: I

I'm totally in !!! I love their personalities, I can't wait to see how they'll blossom. I prefer it when the female character is the outgoing one, it's really refreshing. I'm eager to read more about them !!



Author's Response:

I think Jonah is such a cutie and his personality is some type of guy just waiting to be released from his nerd cocoon. I also prefer it when the female lead is actually confident and outgoing, it's a nice break from the 'hot nerd girl'. I'm already working on the next chapter and giving you more insight on who they are as people. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

Reviewer: Peanut Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 04 2014 01:36 am

Title: I

Chanel is not  a nice person, Jonah. Don't like Chanel at all. Jonah, I like!!



Author's Response:

Lol. Chanel is a special kind of mean- at least that's where I'm trying to go, I'm not totally sure it's working though. I'm waiting to develop her character more- I can't wait till we get to the bright side of her personality! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!

 

Reviewer: pmgayles Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 04 2014 12:56 am



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