Terri

“Well…?” Laila pressed.

I looked up at her and sighed. Why was it so hard for me to put my thoughts into words all of a sudden? When did I reach this point in my life where I find it extremely uncomfortable and hard to tell my supposed best friend stuff that best friends should already know?

“Well what?” I sarcastically replied.

“We’ve been sitting here for at least thirty minutes. I’m not trying to pressure you into saying something, but c’mon Ter…you’re the one who initiated this conversation.”

“True.”

“So go on?”

“I don’t know where to begin, to be honest, Lay. There’s so much shit bottled up inside me that I have nowhere to start. It’s all a mess.”

“Start off with telling me how things were when you were little? Even if it’s just your parents’ names. I’d love to hear about that stuff.”

“Their names are Katherine and Jeffery and I haven’t spoken to them in about ten years…”

“Why??”

“I don’t know. I’ve been so caught up with work and traveling that I sort of lost contact with them.”

“They’re your parents. How could you possibly forget about them? If you really wanted to talk to them, you would have made an effort.”

“You’re right. I guess I didn’t really care enough to keep them updated with my life. I changed my number, my address, and stopped talking to everyone from home altogether.”

“Seems to me like you made more of an effort to remove them from your life than to keep them in it. Why is that?”

“Because they were too nosy. They always wanted to know what I was up to. It was like I was living through them since they never got the chance to go to college or make something of themselves. I was so tired of having to call them up everyday and describe, in detail, every action I made during that particular day.”

“Did you ever consider the thought that maybe they cared about you and were worried about you being so far away from them? What I do know about you is that you’re their only child. That’s how my dad is with me. Especially since we’ve got this whole wealth thing going for us. I may not be aware of all the reasons to why you decided not to talk to them anymore, but judging by what you just said…I say you call them up one day. You need to know how they’re doing.”

“I can’t, Laila. My mom is so annoying!”

“All moms are annoying, but that’s just how they are. It’s because they love us so much and they’d hate to see us make a bad turn in life.”

“She hung the phone up on me when I told her I stopped going to church. Of all the things I’ve done right with my life, I chose to not be around the world’s biggest hypocrites and she gets pissed off. And that’s just one example. The woman was definitely not right in her head.”

“Right…so now that you’re looking back on that, do you regret it? You know, not talking to her because of that?”

“In some ways, yes; because I get so lonely…but I feel like that was something that needed to be done.”

“Since you’re trying to turn your life around and all that good stuff…I think the first step would be to reconcile with your parents. A lot of people feel super empty when they’re not in a good place with their parents. Another step you can take, which is completely irrelevant to your family…is to fuck the living hell out of Daniel Jones” she smirked.

I shot my head up and gave her a shocked expression. “Where the hell did that come from?”

“You knew it was inevitable. I just caught you two in a very compromising position. Did you think I was going to really forget that? Seriously?”

“Yeah, well. I’m not ready to talk about that right now because I’m still trying to wrap my own head around it.”

“I knew there was a spark between ya’ll! Tell the truth. How long has this been going on? Is he any good in bed?”

“Laila! No! I don’t know! Stop asking questions!” I shouted out. She began laughing in a teasing kind of way. The whole situation was too awkward for me to have to deal with but she deserved an explanation and I knew Daniel and I had to talk eventually. He deserved answers.

Laila rubbed my arm in an attempt to comfort me. “I’m excited because you could have a real chance at happiness. Daniel is bringing something out in you that I have never seen and he’s only known you for a short time. Give him a chance.”

“I’m not giving him anything. This isn’t some sort of fantasy. My job and life is on the line! He needs to go find someone his own age. I’m too complicated. Too damaged for him.”

“You can keep trying to make up excuses all you want, but trust me on this. There’s something there and if you fuck it up, you’ll be missing out on a once in a lifetime opportunity.”

Rolling my eyes, I unwrapped my arm from around her and scooted over to the other side of the couch.

“No pressure” Laila added with a short giggle.

Various thoughts began to pop up inside my head. A large majority of them had to do with my future. Where do I go from here?

Daniel

Sleep for that night did not come easy for me. What the hell was I thinking when I kissed Terri? The fact that she was my boss didn’t cross my mind once as I caressed every inch of her slim body. If Laila hadn’t made an entrance, only God knows what would have happened between us. The woman was like a piping hot stove burner and I was the curious little boy who wanted to find out what it was like to touch it. I could only dream about having a future with her. She didn’t seem like the future “type”. My determination to discover more about her was higher than ever.

The next couple of days were unusually miserable for me because it was obvious that Terri was hiding from me. It was good that I didn’t have to sign the contract, but I missed her. I wanted to see her. Laila avoided giving me any information each time I bought her up so I was frustrated. Alonzo Lopez would stop me every time he saw me and would say something to “convince” me that signing with him was the right choice.

Being that Terri was always on top of her game, I was scheduled for multiple photo shoots and group sessions. She kept me busy so that I had no real reason to bother her. After my last photo shoot for the week, I picked up some coffee and caught the bus over to Terri’s apartment. Not speaking to me was not going to cut it.

She answered the door with a pair of tight black shorts on and a loose fitting tank top. She was holding a red coffee cup and her hair was pulled back into a low bun. Sexy wasn’t even the word…

“What are you doing here?” She asked with a straight emotionless face.

I walked past her and into the apartment. “I bought coffee.”

Terri slowly swirled around to meet my gaze. “That definitely was not the answer to my question…”

“We need to talk. Again…and I promise it won’t end up like last time. I swear.”

She looked down and blushed. “I’m not ready to talk about that, Daniel.”

“I can do most of the talking or whatever you want me to do but we can’t pretend like that didn’t happen. There’s no way we can avoid this.”

I watched her as she closed the door and grabbed the coffees out of my hand. “Have a seat.”

She put the cups down on the table and sat down in the couch directly across from me. I sat down and took notice of her nervousness. Terri must have crossed and uncrossed her legs at least five or six times. It was cute.

“Say what you have to say and leave.”

“Harsh much?” I joked.

“Nothing’s changed.”

“Right. Okay…so, what do we do from here?”

“If I had the overriding choice in the matter, I’d say we ignore it and go about our daily lives…but-“ She paused and shook her head.

“But?”

“I’m trying to change.”

“Because?”

“I don’t think I’m a good person” she shrugged. “And you know what’s funny about this whole thing? I’ve never openly admitted it. I’ve never opened up to anyone.”

“Why are you choosing to do it now?”

“I blame you.”

“Me?” I pointed to myself.

Terri smirked and brought her legs up to her chest, resting her chin on her knees. “It’s something about you that makes me so…vulnerable. It’s like I feel helplessly emotional around you and I hate it.”

“Of course you hate it. No one, especially someone as independent and strong as you, likes to feel weak and powerless. Like I said before, you’ve got to let people in. You can’t be strong forever.”

“True. Look, what happened between us last night was inappropriate and I wish I could say that I hope it never happens again, but I enjoyed myself way too much” she smiled. The sight of her flashing a genuine smile made my heart dropped. I had to clench my chest and pick up my breathing pattern in order to alleviate the uncomfortable feeling. “I don’t know if that spurred from me being a little…rusty…in my love life” Terri cleared her throat, signaling slight embarrassment. “Or…”

I lifted myself out of my spot on the sofa and made my way over to her. She looked up at me with innocent eyes and did a semi-pout. Before she could protest, I bent down and pulled her up out of the tan colored antique looking chair. “How long has it been?”

“How long as what been?” she quietly asked.

I gently tugged her closer to me and placed my left arm around her waist as my right arm was wrapped around her upper back. We were standing in a hug in the middle of her living room. “Since you’ve been with a man, Terri…” I whispered.

Terri shuddered between my arms and began to avoid contact. “I don’t believe that’s any of your business.”

“Do you ever get tired of telling people that? Don’t you think they know it’s none of their business since they’re asking you a personal question in the first place? Has it ever occurred to you that they want to know more about you? Everyone isn’t out there to hurt you.”

I could feel her pushing away from me. Like it came natural for her to push away anyone who wanted to get emotionally close to her.  I pulled her closer. “Tell me. I’m not going anywhere until you tell me.”

She whimpered as I tenderly grabbed her chin and forced her to make eye contact with me.  “Why do you need to know this?”

“I care about you. I want to see you happy because you deserve it. Everyone deserves to have something or someone that makes them look forward to getting up in the morning.”

“What makes you think I don’t have that?” she stared into my eyes as her lips quivered.

Caressing her soft cheek, I bent down closer to her face. “You walk around with great power, but you look sad. You look like you’re mentally crying out for help. You want someone to come along and show you that life is worth living. You need excitement. Someone who completes you and understands you.”

“Fuck you. You don’t know anything about me” Terri spat out.

“Ah, yet another overused statement from you” I pulled her closer. So close that our lips were practically touching. “I don’t run away easily so you’ll really have to try in order for me to even budge.”

Tears were threatening to stream from her eyes but something was holding them back. That’s when I began to wonder about how long it’s been since the woman cried.

“You’re right. I know nothing about you. Absolutely nothing! But you know what? I’m making an effort to know you. I want to know everything about you because like I’ve stated before…I care about you! Is it so hard for you to believe that someone gives a fuck about you? For God’s sake! You have Laila, you’ve got me…you’ve got your family-“

“I don’t have anybody!!” she cried out. “Which is fine. I don’t deserve to be close to anyone. The only person that can save me is myself.”

“Save you from what?”

“Myself, Daniel. I’m the one who causes all of the isolation and coldness in my heart. It’s all on me! You…or Laila can’t help me. Okay? Now leave me alone.” This time she was strong enough to shrug herself out of my arms. Terri stormed into the kitchen and proceeded to pour herself a glass of wine.

The next ten minutes passed in silence. I sat on one of the four barstools and observed her. She was nervously tapping her fingers on the countertop as she downed her third glass of merlot. “Are you trying to get yourself drunk?” I murmured.

“If that makes you leave, then yes. I am trying to get drunk. Drunk enough so I won’t have to remember any of this” Terri harshly responded.

I got up, walked around the counter, and over to her. She quietly looked up at me as I removed the glass from her hand and placed it on the countertop. “You do know I’m not leaving until we talk, right? I don’t have anything planned for tomorrow so I suggest you start talking unless you’d enjoy having a sleepover.”

Terri continued to stare at me until she was defeated. “It’s been seventeen years.”

“Seventeen years?!” I exclaimed with wide eyes. What the hell? How?! What? Damn! How could a woman this beautiful go this many years without having sex? `

“Yeah” she bowed, clearly ashamed of herself. “I have my reasons. And you better not tell this to anybody. Laila doesn’t even know…”

“I won’t.”

More seconds passed.

“What are your reasons?”

“Why were you homeless?”

“Not the response I was looking for…but if you must know, it’s because the career path I was looking to launch didn’t turn out in my favor.”

“How so?” she cocked her head to the side and crossed her arms over her chest.

“I came to Hollywood like any other gullible hopeful college student and got my hopes up. I quit my studies to run after my dream.”

“How did you get homeless from that? Couldn’t you simply have gotten a regular job and worked to afford a place to live?”

“I looked into all of that, trust me. No one wanted to hire me due to my lack of previous work experience. My parents decided to not support me so there I was. All alone in this huge city without a pot to piss in.”

“How long were you on the streets?”

“Almost a year. And then you and Laila came along. I considered the two of you to be my angels. You saved me.”

“You considered me to be an angel after I treated you like the scum of the earth?”

“Yes. I knew you meant well.”

“Right.”

“How old are you?”

Terri sighed and took a step closer to me. “Might’ve well tell you since I’ve been telling you everything else about myself, huh?”

I nodded my head and pulled her closer to me.

“I’m thirty-nine. Fortieth birthday’s in a month. I love anything that has strawberries in it. I’m a spiritual person but far from religious…and I secretly listen to rock music.”

“See? Now was that so hard?” I chuckled. “Also, you don’t look a day over thirty.”

“Thanks.”

When she was finally in my arms, I began placing small kisses along the line of her collarbone and neck. Terri let out a low moan and automatically pulled me closer to her. Once I reached her soft and inviting lips, I closed my mouth over hers and gave her a sensual kiss. She sighed against my lips and wrapped her arms around the back of my neck. My fingers crawled from the bottom of her back and up into her tank top, coming in contact with the smoothness of her brown skin. As I felt the tip of her tongue seductively make its way into my mouth, I growled. The kiss deepened into one of those hungry, starved ones. Terri’s hands framed both sides of my face and I could feel her tongue gently massaging mines. She grinded her pelvis up against mines giving me an immediate hard-on. I blushed at the sensation. 

Unable to control myself, my hands found themselves grabbing her tight little ass and giving it a semi-hard slap. Terri reacted instantly by giggling against my lips and tugging my hair as she nibbled on my bottom lip. My hands eventually slid themselves up past her slim waist and to her perky breasts. She let out a loud whimper as I cupped them in my hands and gave them a slight squeeze.

The kiss ended with Terri forcefully pushing herself away from me. She licked her lips and began to breathe heavily. “What are we doing?” she asked breathlessly.

“Making out…”

“No. We can’t. I need for you to sign that contract.”

I pulled her back towards me by grabbing her shirt and looking deep into her brown eyes. “I’m not signing that damn contract. I want you to manage my career. Not some jackass that only sees me as his meal ticket.”

“Daniel…”

“Terri. Baby.”

She sighed and closed her eyes out of frustration. “Don’t be difficult.”

“I’m not trying to be difficult. I want you in so many more ways than one. Just because we’re getting to know each other on another level does not mean you have to force me away. “

“You signing with Alonzo is the best thing for the both of us. I like to think about the consequences of every action I make and I like to think about how the future will be if I make a certain decision. If we continue whatever the hell this is…it’ll only end badly. You know how I can get. I’m very professional and I want you to have a great career. Doing this will only get in the way…no matter how much we want each other.”

“You’re right” I continued to hold her close to me.

“I am?”

“Yes…but I’m still not signing that contract. You like to play safe and it’s hard for you to take a chance at something unless you know for sure that you have control over the whole situation.”

“Please?” she whispered almost desperately.

“No and that’s my final answer.”

Terri

“I’ve been asking him for the last two weeks, Alonzo. He doesn’t want to sign with you so stop bothering me about it.”

Alonzo and I were sitting beside each other at a fashion show in New York City waiting for Daniel to make his debut appearance as a runway model. I was sandwiched between him and the overly ecstatic Laila. Jocelyn, the runway coach, sat behind me nervously tapping her foot against the ground while biting her fingernails. I had scored this gig at the last minute. One of the photographers from our many photo shoots recommended Daniel to a designer and the designer begged me to let him use my model. I have a strong belief that this will put him somewhere on the map and tomorrow I shall be expecting a ton of phone calls.

The runway was set up in a luxurious hotel in the middle of Manhattan. Hundreds were in attendance and there was a good vibe circulating within the building. Since both genders were participating in the fashion show, we got a good look at a few of the up and coming models of 2013. Each model had to showcase four different outfits from the designer’s new collection. Before the show started, Jocelyn coached Daniel as hard as she could on what not to do out there and how to save himself from embarrassment.

It all became surreal as Daniel stepped his first foot on the platform and began walking to the beat of the music. Jocelyn grabbed me and dug her short fingernails into my shoulder as she looked onward at the stage. “Here he is!” she shouted. “Oh God, I think I’m gonna throw up…”

Completely ignoring her, I focused my eyes on Daniel. Damn it if he didn’t look fine as hell in that outfit. He was dressed in a pair of fitted khakis, a black V-neck shirt, and an olive green military style jacket. He had on a pair of untied black combat boots as well. And he was working the shit out of that runway. Spectators were staring at him in awe and wanting to know who he was.

In that moment, I felt like a proud mother. Laila wrapped her arm around me and let out a low signature squeal. “He’s doing so great, Terri. If you let Alonzo sign him I will kill the both of you with my bare hands!”

“I’m not letting him do anything” I whispered to her. “He’s mine.”  After taking another look at Daniel as he began walking back to the beginning of the catwalk, I leaned over and whispered to her again. “All mines…”