“So what happened?” Rick asked Roy the next day as they prepared for maneuvers.

Roy Fokker, commander of the Skull Squadron, just smiled and said the words that Rick had never expected to come out of his friend’s lips, “I think I’ve fallen in love.”

I think I’ve fallen in love.

Fallen in love.

Those three words reverberated through Roy Fokker’s head with all the power of being slammed by major g-forces.

Fallen in love.  With Claudia Grant.

And he was going to see her tonight.

The hows or whys didn’t matter, merely the sensation of having his well-ordered universe turned completely upside down.

Roy Fokker had never been in love before, and the feeling was as confusing as it was elating.  In his world of war and bloodshed there simply hadn’t been the room for another human being, at least in that sense.  He’d had women aplenty, though he was honest enough to know that for most of them, it had been more about their ability to boast that they’d slept with Roy Fokker the war hero and leader of Skull Squadron, and less about Roy Fokker the man. At one point in time, the reasons wouldn’t have mattered in the least.  Everyone got what they wanted.  He got sexual release, they got bragging rights.

Until some sexy Lt. Commander with skin the color of warm moonlight and skin as smooth as satin captured his thoughts.  His fantasies had become so powerful at night that he awoke with sheets drenched in sweat and a cock so hard that even the merest touch was nearly painful.

He had never wanted a woman so badly, but never had he been so afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing.  He’d never been so aware of his feelings for another person.  More importantly, he’d never been so aware of his mortality, and the thought of dying before ever having truly lived no longer sat well with him.

Even Rick had expressed shock at the subtle changes in his best friend.

“Are you sure you’re not just infatuated, Roy?”  Rick asked him a few days later in the hangar after their shift.  “I mean she’s the only woman who basically told you to stuff it.  Most women can’t wait to jump your bones.”

The slight crudity of Rick’s speech didn’t faze him.  “I can’t explain it, little bro.  It’s like lightning or something.  I’m not even sure how it happened much less why.  All I know is that Claudia Grant is in my blood, and that she’s not going away anytime soon.”

Rick shrugged.  “Well whatever happens, I wish you the best.  Hopefully you won’t end up with as much drama as MinMei and me.”

Roy didn’t remember the rest of the conversation between the two of them; then again, there was nothing new to tell in Rick’s ongoing saga with the spoiled pop princess and former Miss Macross.  Their relationship was juvenile to the extreme, at least on her side it was.  It was as if Lynn MinMei didn’t know if she wanted a lover or a lap dog, though Roy was certain it was the latter.

Besides, he had more important things on his mind, like his date with Claudia Grant. 

What would she like, dinner and a movie?  Dancing?  A romantic walk in the park under the stars—or what passed for stars onboard a massive battle fortress?

Holding his battered acoustic in his lap, while strumming idly a familiar tune, he wondered if Claudia would like to hear him play.

***

 “I would like for us to run through attack simulation theta again, Lisa.  I think we were a bit slow to respond.”

Admiral Gloval casually observed his young and mostly female crew being put through their paces.  They’d performed exceedingly well in the real life and death situation, but it was always good to keep the edge sharp.

As Lisa set the simulation program to the desired scenario, she regarded Claudia quizzically, as she’d been doing the past several days since the night at ‘The Bridge’, the officer’s club several levels below them.  Claudia hadn’t mentioned much about what happened after she and Roy Fokker had left together, holding hands and looking less like friends and more like potential lovers. 

And of course, speculation surrounding the new couple ran riot on the bridge of the SDF-1. Lisa had to remind the bridge bunnies in no uncertain terms about spreading unfounded rumors, considering that they were in the midst of a war, but Claudia, lost in whatever personal memories she held, didn’t seem to care in the least.

***

Claudia just didn’t understand why people simply couldn’t mind their own business. 

Yes, she’d kissed Fokker and he kissed her back.  Yes, he asked her out and she agreed.  So what?  It wasn’t like the same situation wasn’t happening somewhere else in the universe. Then again what did she expect?  Fokker had a reputation as a ladies man, and if the look that one female junior officer gave her at the club was any indication, not everyone was thrilled about having the most eligible, if elusive bachelor, being taken out of circulation.  None of that took into account that the date might turn out disastrously. That Roy Fokker’s true colors would show, and that she’d have to send him packing.

But what if it didn’t?  What if Roy Fokker turned out to be the most incredible man she’d ever known? What then?

If anything, their date tonight would help her sort out the myriad feelings that had become a part of her life since.  She went from intense attraction to skittish wariness, sometimes both emotions in the same thought.  Still at night, he dominated her fantasies and it was almost painful to wake up, being torn from his spectral arms.

***

Captain Mika Indigo of Skull Squadron was sick and tired of the chatter, and though she didn’t know Claudia Grant, save that the woman was her superior officer, she was sick and tired of her too.

Don’t tell me that men don’t gossip as much as women, Mika thought sourly as she ran her fighter through its diagnostics.  She’d taken a minor hit in the last skirmish with the Zentraedi, and though it wasn’t serious, to ignore even a scratch could mean the difference between life and death.

She saw the hooded looks from her fellow pilots and even some of the mechanics.  She heard the whispers and the speculations and she was frankly tired of playing it off.  Mika knew that some of the less charitable figured that she’d finally gotten what she deserved; they wrongfully assumed that she’d slept with Roy Fokker in exchange for her position.

Of course, some of the male pilots were also jealous of Fokker’s prowess with women, and it had to irk them to no end that he’d managed to get his hands on one of the few females in the squadron.  Perhaps that was her own fault, for engaging in such a liaison in the first place, but she’d thought her situation to be different.  After all, she’d graduated from the academy in the top one-percent, and she’d demonstrated her leadership qualities many times during the Zentraedi onslaught.   She’d earned the right as well as the title and her personal life was nobody’s business.

Honestly though, it rankled a bit to have been superseded by a commanding officer.  The thought that perhaps Fokker’s attraction might be short lived was of small comfort.

It wasn’t as if she wasn’t beautiful enough to hold the interest of a man like Roy Fokker for any length of time.  Tall, slender, with lively blue-gray eyes and a radiant mane of fawn brown hair kissed with bronze highlights, she could hold her own even to a Lt. Commander.

Mika had never entertained the merest thought or ambition to be Mrs. Roy Fokker—life was too uncertain for anything that permanent.  But as far as she was concerned, she and Roy had come to a comfortable understanding. 

Maybe too comfortable.

Perhaps she should ask Roy what was going on, have it out face to face.  At least then she’d have some answers.

***

Nothing looked good.

That attitude was a far cry from several nights ago, when the only thing that stopped Claudia from wearing one of her more outré outfits was Lisa’s apparent disapproval.  This time, everything seemed to be sending the wrong signals.  She didn’t want—well she did want Roy to see her as enticing, but not sluttish.

Damn, I just don’t know what I want, she thought dejectedly, plopping down on her bed.  “Oh mommy, I wish you were right here.  You’d set me straight.”

And Vespasia Grant of the strong will and forthright opinions would have indeed helped her daughter make sense of it all.  It had been her mother who, in spite of the rest of the family’s stringent protests, enrolled Claudia in the academy, insisting that not only would their highly gifted child receive a top-notch education, but she would have more opportunities for advancement.  The Global Civil War had done near-irreplaceable damage to the world’s infrastructure, and many people were out of work, even talented scientists and teachers, such as Vespasia Grant, found themselves doing menial work just to make ends meet.

Her mother had been a loving, generous, if stern woman, who simply would say she trusted her daughter enough for her to make the right decisions, and Claudia always had.

Slightly buoyed by the positive thoughts, Claudia once again took up the task of deciding what to wear.

***

“We need to talk.”

Roy’s mind was forcibly brought back to the here and now by the sound of Mika’s chilly voice behind him.

Oh damn, he thought, having totally put his third-in-command out of his mind since Claudia entered it.

The two of them hadn’t exactly been an item, but Mika had been a steady presence in his world, and his bed, for the past year.  He knew what people said about her, and in all fairness, he went out of his way to prove to them that it had indeed been her talent as a leader, and not her talents between the sheets that had been the deciding factor in her promotion.  He owed her the grace of ending their relationship, but this just wasn’t the right time and he said so as tactfully as possible.

He should have counted on her trademark stubbornness.

“Actually, Fokker, this is a perfect time to discuss what’s going on here,” she said sweetly, her blue-gray eyes flashing angrily.

“Listen, Mika.  I was going to tell you, but it seems that gossip travels very fast around here.”

“I know that.  It still doesn’t explain why you couldn’t tell me yourself about you and Lt. Grant.  I’m the biggest laughingstock in the squadron right now, and I don’t like feeling foolish.”

Roy sighed deeply, knowing that he owed her an explanation.  “Look, I won’t lie to you.  Something’s happened to me, something that I haven’t the foggiest notion of how or why, but I just know that Claudia Grant has come to mean a lot to me.”

“That didn’t take long,” Mika sneered.  “And how could you possibly have developed feelings for a woman who blew you off on the dance floor three nights ago, unless the sex was that good?”

“Not that’s any of your business,” Roy replied archly, “But I haven’t slept with her.”

Mika’s eyebrows arched sardonically.  “That’s a shock.  Isn’t your standard operating procedure to fuck first, ask names later?”

“And if I remember correctly, that didn’t seem to bother you on our first date,” he retorted, just as sweetly venomous.  “It took you less than thirty seconds after saying hello before my cock was in your mouth.”

Point scored as he heard Mika’s indrawn breath.  He didn’t feel triumphant about having to resort to that type of cruelty, but again, since Claudia, nothing made much sense to him.  He felt the need to protect her from innuendo, even from people she didn’t know.

“I don’t get it, Fokker.  Is it true what everyone’s been telling me for the past year or so?  That you’re really planning to sleep your way up the chain of command?  If that’s the case, then what I feel for Lt. Grant isn’t jealousy, it’s pity.”

Mika spun on an elegant heel, turning her head over to peer at him over her shoulder, her hair brushing against her shoulder.  “You don’t know what love is, Fokker.  All you know about is living for the moment, just like I do.  And you don’t take pain very well.”

The door closed softly behind her and Roy let loose a string of epithets that would have shocked even the most hardened of soldiers.

It was hard to believe—that people actually thought of him in that way—an opportunist willing to use his body to get what he wanted.  He’d given much of his life, and a great deal of his blood to protect the earth during the days of the civil war, and here he was giving just as much against an enemy that vastly outnumbered the earth forces seven to one—and for what?  So jealous and petty people could insult his war record behind his back?

Worse, if this was a rumor that had been spreading unbeknownst to him for all this time, what must Claudia think?  Sinking his head into his hands, Roy Fokker, Commander of the valiant Skull Squadron, felt the weight of dejection set upon his shoulders.

***

Claudia tried not to stare at the digital clock on the wall.  Nine-thirty.

The plan had been for Roy to pick her up here at nine o’clock, and she couldn’t imagine him being so rude as not to call.

For the tenth time, she checked her appearance in the full-length mirror near her bedroom.  She chosen a simple, yet casual look of tailored cropped pants, madras plaid blouse and denim jacket, and on her feet were strappy, low-heeled sandals.  She’d added honey-brown highlights to her hair, and her eyes, accentuated with the faintest line of blue-green liner, gave her a subtle, sexy look.  Not that Fokker was here to enjoy the end result of nearly three hours worth of preparation, much of that spent figuring out what to wear.

At the best of times, Claudia was an even-tempered soul, and she had the ability to balance the personality extremes of her bridge mates, including the often taciturn Admiral Gloval.  But once her anger was roused, it took a lot more than counting to ten to bring it back under control.  Being stood up by Roy Fokker was testing the limits of her patience, and if he didn’t show up or call in the next five minutes, there would be some serious hell to pay.

Then again, was she really all that surprised?

“To hell with him anyway,” and she stormed out of her quarters in a rage.

***

No one noticed as she made her way to Roy’s quarters, remembering the directions he’d given her.  She didn’t want to take her anger out on anyone else save him, finding out what he meant by standing her up for their first—and last, date.  Then after she called him every name in the book, she’d take herself back to ‘The Bridge’ and get herself absolutely shitfaced.  If she was lucky, she wouldn’t be returning to her quarters alone.  It didn’t matter; if it took another man’s arms to make her forget all about Roy Fokker, so be it.

Emotions dictating her movements, she knocked once on the door.  She knocked again.

She was not ready for what opened the door.

His eyes were red-rimmed, and not from drinking.  His hair was mussed, and he looked less like the cocksure pilot and more like a man in soul-deep pain.

Anger faded quickly to concern.  “Oh my god, Roy, what is it?”

Claudia let herself into his quarters, closing the door behind her, as Roy just slid back into an easy chair and closed his eyes.  “Do you think I’m trying to sleep my way up the chain of command,” he asked his voice tight from the tears he couldn’t shed.

“Where the hell did that come from?  Talk to me, Roy.”

“I’ve just been accused by someone I thought I knew rather well, that people believe my ultimate goal is sleeping my way to Admiral Gloval’s command chair.”  His laughter was full of bitter irony.  “Apparently, my war record isn’t good enough.”

“And you believe that, right?”  Claudia’s arms were crossed in front of her, her eyes a mixture of empathy and anger.  “Listen to me, Roy Fokker, you might be the biggest gigolo in the universe, but you’re also one of the best soldiers we’ve got, and that kind of ability can’t be learned from between the sheets.”

A small smile curled on his lips, and the sight warmed her.  “Besides, if you were planning to sleep your way up the chain of command, you would have started with the ‘bridge bunnies’ first,” Claudia pointed out wryly. When he raised an eye at the unfamiliar moniker, she added, “Sammie, Vanessa and Kim.  That’s what Lisa and I call them, though I don’t think they know that.”

Roy grimaced the thought of any one of the cute but very immature ‘bridge bunnies’ as potential lovers.  Their high-pitched voices and endless chatter often set his teeth on edge, though he knew the three were more than competent officers.

 “Of course,” Claudia continued blithely, sensing that Roy was beginning to emerge from the cloud of his depression, “Once you made your way through those three, only then you’d get to sleep with me.”  She gave him a knowing wink.  “Of course, after you tired of me,” and again she winked at him, “You’d have a bit of a problem because to put it bluntly, Lisa can’t stand you.”

That wasn’t a surprise to Roy, was often at odds with the strong-willed First Officer.  Still to hear it from Claudia’s lips did little to boost his morale.

“That’s not to say that she doesn’t have any respect for you as a soldier and a leader, because she regards you highly in that respect.  It’s just that she doesn’t think much of you as a man.”

Having found his voice again, Roy asked her quietly, “And what do you think of me, Claudia?”

Tilting her head to one side, she gave him a warm smile.  “Soldier to soldier, you are the best we’ve got out there.  No one understands robotechnology better than you do, and you’re a damn fine leader.  I have to say that you do take a lot of unnecessary risks, but they seem to pay off in the end. As a man however, my jury is still out.”

“How do I tilt the jury in my favor then?”

“By not standing me up on our first date, Mr. Fokker,” she responded with mock seriousness.  “But since there are extenuating circumstances in this case, I won’t hold it against you.”

A comfortable silence fell between them as Claudia’s steadfast presence began to dissipate the last of his doubts.  She was an amazing woman, powerful yet compassionate.  No one had ever cared enough to be there for him in his darker moments, and while she could have told him to go straight to hell for flaking out on their date, she had put that aside, lending both a sympathetic ear and old-fashioned common sense.

“Will you stay with me tonight?”  In his tone as well as in his eyes was a vulnerability Claudia hadn’t known existed.  Truly there was a lot more to Roy Fokker than anyone knew.  Then again, it was more than likely a side he never let anyone else see.

Except for her.

“I just don’t think me being out in public is such a good idea, considering.  Right now, I just want to relax in good company and learn more about you.”

“That doesn’t sound like the playboy pilot I know,” Claudia joked, disguising the fact that her heart was racing out of control.  “Conventional wisdom has me flat on my back right now.”

The gaze he turned upon her was enough to scorch paint from the walls, and it made her weak.  For all his sensitivity, Roy Fokker was still a devastatingly virile man. 

“I won’t lie to you Claudia Grant, I would thoroughly enjoy making wild, passionate love to you, and I’ve dreamt of nothing else for the past few days, but you’ve come to mean a lot more to me than a way to get my rocks off.”

She took a deep breath to calm herself.  “Then I’d say we have a date.”

***

The rest of the evening passed companionably as the two of them shared stories of their lives, their families, their hopes and dreams.

“My favorite food is pineapple salad,” he told her offhandedly in one of their shared moments of candor.

Still, the undercurrent of passion surrounded them, making it difficult to remain unaffected.  They were both aware of the little signals—a light touch on the hand or the arm, or a shared smile.  And Roy used every excuse he could think of to touch her, to feel even for a second, that silky skin against his own roughened hands.

When Claudia saw the acoustic guitar perched against the wall, she asked him out of the blue, “Would you play me something?”

He never allowed anyone to hear him play, much less sing, but the look in her eyes allowed him to refuse her nothing.

The moment he struck the opening chords of a song he’d only written days ago—a song inspired by her—he was both lost in the moment, and in the image of her completely spellbound.  Her beautiful green eyes were soft, almost dreamy, and her body seemed to flow with the music.

She was amazed at how beautiful his singing voice was, like a mixture of whisky and caramel, husky yet smooth.  The thought of his voice in the dark as they made love—

God, she should leave now, but didn’t want to, nor could she force her limbs to move.  Whatever happened this night would happen, and life was too short and uncertain to worry about tomorrow.

The last traces of the song faded into her memory, insuring that she’d never forget it.  Their eyes met, saying everything that needed to be said.

“That was incredibly beautiful, Roy,” Claudia breathed.

“So are you,” and the kiss that they both had wanted finally came.

There was nothing about his skills in seduction that made kissing Claudia as heady and as intoxicating as any alcohol.  It was her honesty and her caring.  It was the fact that she didn’t judge him for his past, though she couldn’t absolve him of some of the baggage that came with it.  It was the fact that she chose to see him for the man he really was, rather than the man he’d hidden behind years of bravado.

He liked his true self far better than the persona.

Entwining his fingers in the crinkled silk curls of her hair, he deepened their kiss, tasting the velvet honey of her warm and welcoming mouth.  No woman had the right to taste so good, he thought dazedly as their tongues performed a gentle parry and riposte.  Fighting back the overwhelming urgency to strip her bare and bury himself deep inside of her, he nibbled gently on her lower lip until she groaned and brought his mouth back to hers.

She lay atop him, a comforting weight, her breasts crushed against his chest.  He swore he felt the hardened nubs of her nipples through her blouse, and he was more than certain she could feel the solid length of his arousal between her legs. He seared a path down the swan-like delicacy of her neck, lapping at the wildly beating pulse there. The intensity of their kiss was as exhilarating as being airborne, as he took sweet hostage of her mouth over and over.  Her breath became the only air that mattered.

No woman had ever felt so good in his arms.

And no woman had ever been worth waiting for.

Breaking the kiss, Roy looked deeply into her eyes, passion haze coloring his eyes a soft sky blue.  “I want you so badly, Claudia Grant.  My entire body is urging me to make love to you.”

“So why don’t you.”  Claudia’s own body felt languid and heavy with desire, his kiss still singing through her veins.

He kissed the tip of her nose.  “But I want more than that from you.  I want your regard, your friendship, and I want your love.”

Like a spray of icy water hitting her full on, shock coursed through Claudia.  She wanted to pull away, but the steel of Roy’s embrace held her fast. “It’s too soon for that, Roy.  I’ll be your friend, but love is something that’s going to take time.”

He nodded in understanding.  “I know that, which is why I’m going to deny my body one more time, though I know I’m going to pay for it.”  The tip of his finger stroked her cheek.  “You’re worth the wait.”

There was nothing else to say, so Claudia gave herself over to the sensation of their lips meeting once again, kissing him with a hunger that in spite of everything, she had never denied.

***

Sleep eluded both Claudia and Roy that night, caught as they were in the memory of their first night together.

And how the power of one small word—love—that could alter their lives forever.